


The Tearoom

by sugarplumsenpai



Series: The Tearoom [1]
Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Adult Eren, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Carla Lives, Cooking, Domestic Fluff, Eren is so sweet you get Diabetes from reading, Fluff, Fluff and Smut, Honestly Beware of the Fluff, Humor, Levi likes his tea (almost as much as he likes Eren), Light Angst, M/M, Older Characters, POV Eren Yeager, POV Levi (Shingeki no Kyojin), Side Jeanmarco, Side Springles, Side YumiKuri, Smut, Tea, Ymir is an adorable badass, levi has a cat, side reibert, …well so is Hanji
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-02
Updated: 2016-01-23
Packaged: 2018-05-11 05:57:50
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 32
Words: 82,173
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5616256
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sugarplumsenpai/pseuds/sugarplumsenpai
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Levi is an "old and grumpy" Englishman who likes high quality tea and does not know how to ask his most favourite vendor out on a date.</p><p>Eren co-runs a tea shop and happens to have a major crush on a certain customer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> This started out as a planned oneshot fan fiction, just an idea popping up in my mind, and at first only a writing experiment. It got out of control very quickly though, with me falling for writing the characters, introducing supporting characters and not wanting to let any of them go, so…voilà! Thus happened 31 chapters that became longer and fluffier during the process of the story.
> 
> Since I’m not the grand master H. I. I don’t own SnK.
> 
> English is not my native language, so it was a great and challenging experience writing this. I’ve read and corrected it over and over by now—adding, deleting, and polishing the sentences—and hope it is clear of most of the misspellings etc. If you happen to find any mistakes please let me know so I can do my best in correcting them as soon as possible. 
> 
> And before we start: Thanks to [my lovely cinnamon roll kneesocksenpai on tumblr](http://kneesocksenpai.tumblr.com/) who encouraged me to start writing, continue, and finally uploading this whole story. She keeps on inspiring me with all those lovely otaku trash sessions every day and provides me with the best fan fiction links one can find. I abosutely adore you, girl! Praise the internet and SnK (and anime in general) for bringing us together!
> 
> I also have a [tumblr](http://sugarplum-senpai.tumblr.com/) if you want to take a peek.
> 
> You might want to listen to Belle & Sebastian’s wonderful music [ (especially this song) ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=rmClYjK1CgA)that they listen to at the Tearoom; it could add a little to the atmosphere. 
> 
> I hope you'll enjoy it!

I relax as soon as I stand in front of it: A tiny, little shop in the centre of this town. You have to use a brief staircase next to the sign “Tearoom”, just three steps down, to enter. Outside there is the Union Jack, welcoming everybody who walks by. “Come in,” it says with a lazy wave. “Make yourself at home”. It is also a promise for every English man in Trost, Germany, who is a little home sick. I always am.

 

The shop itself is bright, as you never would imagine from the outside, looking through the old building’s windows into a room that is almost underground. But it is bright in here. Warm colours greet you and big-patterned wallpapers with ornaments in gold, turquoise, and black on white ground that would make the set designers of “Sherlock” very proud. English china is on display everywhere and adds its flair to the comfy room with white shelves. Left to the entrance there’s a counter with scales and a wall with labelled tea containers behind, spreading to the right with the register on a second counter with a coppery surface and where an empty door frame leads to the personnel department. 

 

The shelves next to the counter are neatly decorated with tea and England themed gifts. A solar Queen waves with never ending enthusiasm. Next to it there is another room with more china, various tea pots and goods, mostly tea, too, and an obviously Asian themed corner. A wonderful scent of all different kinds of dried herbs lulls you in and forms a compelling flavour that clings to the air and always makes me feel at ease somehow. And god—how much do I need to feel at ease from time to time. 

 

My entry is announced by a small bell that rings cheerily. I take a deep breath into my scarf and a wonderful warmth settles around me. Finally I can take off this damn coat!

 

I loathe winter. I hate the coats, the gloves that cover my fingertips. The cold. I despise how everybody seems to be sick or at least close to a serious flu. Everybody sneezes or coughs and if that alone weren’t enough, there is that goddamn snow. It may look pretty at first, but actually it’s an evil bastard. The streets are covered with it and first white and fluffy it quickly get’s muddy and grey and nasty. It is wet and freezing and seems to be everywhere. It brings ice and ice means salt and salt means dirt… I sigh. _No, let’s not drift away to those thoughts._

 

Before I can take my coat off completely Mikasa comes out behind the register and greets me friendly, leaving a—what seems to be—cheerful talk behind in the back of the shop. 

 

“Levi, how nice to see you.” Her English reminds me of home and relaxes me instantly. “We just brewed a Darjeeling first flush for the afternoon. Would you like me to pour you a cup?”

 

“Yes, definitely. Thanks,” I sigh, relieved to have an opportunity to fall back into my native tongue, and take a seat at the counter. She smiles happily, almost as if her day just got a little brighter, and moves to a steaming tea pot in front of me. 

 

As she puts one very tacky pink cup with gold ornaments in front of me with a mischievous grin I frown at her a little. But she just winks and tells me to help myself with the biscuits, before she starts weighing tea amounts in bags and humming to Belle and Sebastian’s relaxing sound coming out of two speakers in the corner of the shop. That’s what I like about Mikasa. She can handle my moods. At least now she can. 

 

I glance at the etagere on the counter to my left, it matches the china in this shop. Shortbread is out to taste today—my favourite—and I can not help myself and sigh again. Not this heavy this time, but way more relaxed. 

 

Yes, there is more than one reason for me to come here instead of just ordering my tea online. And I take it all in. The quiet, atmospheric music. Mikasa humming along with it. The scent of tea in the air, the porcelain cup in my hand, steam rising up against my palm and warming it. The sweet biscuits in front of me. The calming sound of English words still echoing from the back and washing over me…

 

My hand moves on its own, on its search for the most perfect one of the last three pieces of shortbread, completely ignoring the chocolate biscuits next to it. Who needs chocolate when there is shortbread, right? I already know how it will taste like: buttery, crumbly, just the tiniest bit of sweet. Like Heaven on earth and I let it soak up a bit of my tea before I eat it. Yes, like fucking Heaven, indeed. I sigh again. It seems to become an annoying habit of mine and I ask myself how it could have come this far. 

 

“Rough day at work?” Mikasa asks mildly. 

 

I answer with a casual shrug of my shoulders. “No, but the last weeks are catching up with me, I guess,” and I take a sip of the tea. It is delicious. As always. The floral scent hits my nose first and then the warm flavours fill my mouth. A welcome new taste and the caffeine immediately spreads through my veins, and right into my head. “This is amazing! Is it new?” 

 

Mikasa’s smile gets wider now. “Yes, we just got it this year. Armin made the deal.” 

 

As if this was his call, Armin shows up behind me, carrying a tray with freshly washed up cups to store them on the shelf next to the counter where I sit. “Hey, man,” he cheers. 

 

“Hi,” I respond. The tea is really starting to take effect already, warming and comforting me. 

 

“You like the new Darjeeling?”

 

“Yes, indeed. It’s delicious. Good choice, Armin!”

 

He beams at me. “Anything we can get you? Haven’t seen you around in a while.”

 

“Work has been piling up. Yes, 100 g of this one please.” I lift my cup, feeling the hot steam against my palm once more. It is calming me down, and I take another relaxing sip. 

 

“Sure. Anything else?” He has already moved to the canisters on the wall, gets a bag from under the counter, and adds mischievously “we’ve got new biscuits…?”

 

“Better not,” I chuckle. “But I’m completely out of tea at home. Something for evening hours would be nice as well. Is there anything with a little less caffeine that you can recommend?”

 

Armin wrinkles his nose as he keeps on weighing the Darjeeling into the bag. He always seems to do that when he is thinking. 

 

Just now I notice small little packages, clipped to a red ribbon that had been knotted to hooks on the ceiling. It makes its waves all across the main room and the packages go from obvious bags with tea to Christmas crackers, and some box-shapes pieces that probably contain biscuits or chocolate. Every package has an adhesive label with a number on it…their annual Advent calendar that usually the first customer of the day may loot for the daily parcel. Such a nice idea.

 

“We’ve got a new range of herbal infusions,” Mikasa adds mildly to our conversation, pointing to her left with an empty ladle. “I think you don’t know them yet. They’re quite good, actually.”

 

“That’s right, they just came in last month,” Armin adds. “You’ve definitely got to try those.” 

 

The door opens with the ringing of the bell to let in a small group of new customers. They tend to come in here in groups. Friends bringing friends and then more friends or family to show and share this little place of delicious tranquility. The word about this wonderful shop keeps on spreading and I am happy for them. It is well deserved. They only have the best stuff here and know and love their business.

 

“Hi Mikasa, hi Armin”, they greet, and nod at me with a friendly smile, before starting to talk to Mikasa instantly. 

 

It is always kind of funny how new customers immediately become a part of the ‘shop family’ if you might want to call it that way. Everybody seems to be on good terms with each other and quickly adapts to the conversation. Tea to taste is poured and very soon you don’t feel like a stranger anymore. The uncomfortable newness fades and makes place for bright laughter and philosophies about tea and sometimes even food. 

 

And soon you don’t even notice how the spoken languages in this shop keep on switching back and forth. A lot of customers speak English, and with the owners being from London it is always a constant mix-up of English and German words and sentences. 

 

The group moves to the counter to sit down and I politely make space for them, picking up my coat from the chair next to me, whilst listening to the calming chatter before I turn to Armin again. 

 

“So. Herbal tea, huh?”

 

“Actually, they’re called infusions,” Armin responds as he closes my bag of Darjeeling with a grin. 

 

“Tch. Thanks for clearing that up, mister smarty-pants!”

 

He doesn’t give in to my bickering and just winks. “Yeah, we’ve met a woman with a herb garden and she supplies us now. All plants are grown organic and the flavour is amazing. She also mixes them for us. It’s a real treat. Would you like to try one?”

 

“Of course. Which one would you suggest first?” The door opens again to let in more shoppers and I completely move away from the counter now, offering my seat to stand next to Armin. Sitting so close to the tempting biscuits is too much of a diabolic danger anyway. 

 

I instantly find myself in an enthusiastic lecture about herbal infusions and am happy that I can hide my small grin behind a cup. Armin is taking to it like a duck to water. With his widened blue eyes glowing with passion and the blond hair flipping around his head he almost reminds me of an euphoric kid. Even though this kid is grown up and bigger than me, if only by a few centimetres. He opens a few canisters, not stopping in his lively speech, to let me smell and look at the colourful dried content. I must admit to be hooked. 

 

“And this one is my favourite,” he announces, obviously spell-bound. “It has rose petals in it, and lavender, and–”

 

“Forcing your precious tea on poor customers again, Armin?” he gets interrupted with a chuckle and I feel myself tensing up at once, while goosebumps are creeping up my back, where I can feel his gaze. 

 

“He was asking for it.” 

 

“If it is that good, I’d actually like to take a bag, please. 50 grams for starters?” 

 

“Sure thing.” 

 

I turn around, facing the man that some day, I’m sure, will be my downfall. “Hello Eren.” And damn it, he looks good again today. He’s standing behind the register, in this olive green shirt that suits his big, almost turquoise green eyes, twinkling from teasing his friend. His brown hair is ruffled as always, his long arms are folded, and his slender figure leans against the door frame that leads to the personnel department in the back. 

 

He nods at me with an almost too intense gaze. I’m doing my best holding it whilst clinging to my cup. Thank god that this one has a saucer, so both of my hands have something to hold on to. I am too worked out right now to resist him without some kind of safety net. 

 

“Actually, Armin’s right. The new herbal range really is good and the Relax infusion is one of the best in it. You’ll like it,” he simply states and now it is my turn to nod. 

 

“Looking forward to it.” _Ok. One more piece of shortbread?_ Carbs and fat are always good for calming the nerves… I give in and am grateful as the first group of customers moves to the register to pay. Their jolly chit-chat goes on and I thank them silently for their interruption. 

 

“So. How’s the business these days?” What a bad change of topic. I’m so smooth. But Mikasa doesn’t seem to mind. Or she just doesn’t notice. It’s hard to tell with her.

 

“Quite good, actually,” she responds. “Thanks for asking! Christmas is around the corner and people love tea in winter. It’s nice.” 

 

_Damn these biscuits!_ I reach for the third and last one now and know that I’ll be going home with more despite good reason. 

 

Mikasa keeps on weighing tea in bags, labelling them and packing them up to small bundles. “Yesterday was a little quiet but today we’ve just been having a few moments to ourselves before you came in. A busy day.” As if this needed more proof the door opens again and another group of people begins to fill the shop. It is getting cosy in here. 

 

My hint to go. 

 

Taking my two bags of tea and leaving my now empty cup on the counter I make my dreaded walk to the register, stopping on the way to pick up one box of this vicious shortbread. Somehow one box becomes two, and then three as I spot my second favourite biscuits—shortpastry again with lemon and white chocolate. I give a defeated sigh. Keeping weight my arse! 

 

Before the three boxes have the chance to increase even further I place everything in front of Eren. He smirks at the biscuits and suddenly I’m glad about winter time and the welcome distraction of having to slip into my coat. 

 

I pay, take my bag and leave with a wave of my hand. The cold hits me again as soon as I open the door and my lungs need a moment to adapt. _Fuck this shit!_ I think to myself as a small snow drift falls down and right into my neck and I hurry back home. 


	2. Chapter 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Meeting Levi’s somewhat poor excuse of a family.

Of course the first box of shortbread doesn’t even survive one evening. 

 

Arriving back home I shudder and gladly remove my coat, my wet shoes, and this damn ice water soaked scarf. Before I can step into the already forming puddles of melted snow and salt from the streets I get a cloth and wipe them away. 

 

Three months till spring. Three months! Not a hundred days… What a nightmare! 

 

Lizzy greets me with a gentle _“miaow”_ and immediately pokes along my feet, before she curiously inspects the stuff I brought with me. She purrs and nudges the paper bag, sniffling at the content, whilst letting me pat her had. 

  
“I’m back home,” I tell her, pick up the bag and take it into the kitchen. “Did you have a nice time spying on the birds?” She follows me eagerly, still purring. It is so nice to come back home to someone…even if it is ‘just a cat’. 

 

We talk a bit with my hand stroking her almost too soft black fur—okay, I do the talking, but I swear, she gets everything— as a kettle with water heats up on the stove. My mind wanders away, wants to linger at much too bright eyes a few streets away, but I try not to let it. This is so not a good place to go to right now. 

 

The water boils and soon a pot of freshly brewed Darjeeling sits on my desk, a steaming cup in front of me, next to my computer. Time to check my mails. A message from Hanji…of course. 

 

**From: Hanji  
Hey, scowling old man! Wanna hang out this evening?**

 

_Blimey, this tea is good! Bless Armin and his instincts._ While I type my response Lizzy jumps on my lap, silently begging for attention. Of course I give in. What kind of sad monster would you be to be able to resist that?

 

**From: Levi  
With you? Never.**

 

Her response is quick as always.  


 

**From: Hanji  
Thought so. 8 pm sound good?**

 

**From: Levi  
My place? Got some new tea. **

 

**From: Hanji  
Sweet. My place is a dump right now. Want me to bring food? **

 

**From: Levi  
Sushi, please. When you bring food it always ends up being cold, anyway. Also, weather is a bitch right now.**

 

Hanji is brilliant, but cooking and keeping her place clean are not her strength and sometimes she even forgets to eat completely over her work. Fortunately there are a lot of takeaway places in our neighbourhood. Without that and me checking on her downstairs from time to time, I’m sure she would have accidentally starved a few years back. Usually I would love to cook for us on my own but the last few weeks have left me tired and I feel slack. Luckily the holidays are in the foreseeable future. When I lose interest in cooking things truly are bad…

 

**From: Hanji  
Aww! You’re saying such nice things.**

 

“Guess we’ll be having a guests later,” I tell the black ball of fur in my lap. The ball stretches slightly, leans into my hand, snuggles up closer, and slowly drifts away into a warm slumber. Enviable. 

 

I drink more tea, allowing my thoughts to drift off for just a bit, and finally go back to my work with Air’s Moon Safari playing gently in the background. 

 

With Christmas just sneaking up on us it has become a little quiet right now. The printers have their hands full these days, but the graphic department is already slowing down due to the Holiday season. Just a few tiny projects left to to do, mostly Christmas cards and the first projects for spring like product catalogues and newsletters. Most of my clients are on Christmas break already…lucky for me. 

 

October and November have been awfully busy this year again. Not that I complain; I love my work. Still it is always funny how suddenly Christmas keeps on sneaking up on us every year and everybody goes nuts on their projects that come in all way too rapidly. For me this means extra hours—extra nights even—, cranky phone calls, and lots of pressure so I am grateful about the calming down of things now. 

 

My mobile phone lightens up and the snickering elf from “Lemony Snicket’s A Series Of Unfortunate Events” announces a new text message.

 

**From: Hanji  
Okay, if I bring a DVD?**

 

She will bring it anyways.

 

**From: Levi  
Whatever.**

 

Lizzy yawns in my lap and outstretches her fore-paws, pinching my trousers with her pedalling claws before going back to sleep, imitating a soft, cuddly log. All of my trousers look like terry cloth on the thigh part because of her, but I don’t mind. It’s worth it and I wouldn’t trade it for anything. She snores cutely.

 

I immerse myself back into the product catalogue, arranging texts and picture boxes while sipping tea, and I’m almost done when Hanji knocks at the door. I don’t even bother thinking about opening the door for her. We have the keys to each other’s apartment and she, not minding boundaries at all, is already letting herself in. As always.

 

“Take off your shoes in the entrance or I swear to god, I’ll murder you with the disposable chopsticks. And I will make it hurt!” 

 

She just snorts in return, but nevertheless listens. Making her clean up after herself the last time may have something to do with that. Lizzy is already on her way to eagerly sniff at the two new hands to pet her and this makes me free to stand up myself. 

 

I stretch and pick up the bags with our food while Hanji still struggles with her coat and her fogging glasses. Her hair has entangled into her scarf somehow and makes it difficult for her to move. She finally frees herself and almost stumbles out of nowhere. Her brain might be a powerful weapon but sometimes I wonder how she manages pure life. 

 

She drops her coat on the floor—hell, that woman’s a mess!—and reaches down to greet Lizzy. “Hello stinky toes,” Hanji coos and tickles Lizzy chin. 

 

“Look who’s talking!” I just earn a laugh and she follows me out of the wardrobe. Hanji gets us some plates and starts unpacking the sushi, California rolls with shrimp, lots of salmon maki, a few egg rolls and eel, as always, while I prepare another pot of tea. The herbal mix this time. 

 

It looks pretty, even before brewing, and it smells like a warm summer’s evening. As soon as I pour the hot water over the leaves it turns golden and the sweet, pleasant scent of chamomile, combined with something more, hits the room. This might indeed be nice. 

 

I empty my cup with the rest of the Darjeeling, get a clean one for Hanji and join her at the table where she already is inhaling her part of the sushi as if there was no tomorrow. I roll my eyes, estimating how long ago her last meal might have been, and help myself to some salmon and egg maki. Sushi wants to be savoured. For Hanji, however, it is too late for that, so it would be pointless for me to even mention it. 

 

The timer for the tea is beeping and I get the leaves out of the pot before pouring us each one cup. Hanji smiles, her mouth filled with rice and fish, and nods approvingly after her first gulp. “Is that the new one you were talking about? It is delicious!” 

 

I try it myself and can not hide a smile. Yes. It truly is. Armin definitely knows his stuff. “Actually, I got two new ones, but yes.” 

 

“So, you’ve been there today. Everything alright with them?” 

 

“Seems so.” I dip the salmon roll into a bit of soy sauce and make my first bite. Sushi was a good choice for today. 

 

She stares at me. Her eyeballs big behind those glasses and burning a hole right into my head, if they could, her whole face turning into a knowing snicker. 

 

_Crap. Not again. She’ll pester me with questions now…_

 

The good thing about being friends since forever is having a person that knows you well enough to notice if something is up. The bad thing about that, and especially in smart-ass Hanji’s case, is that they can smell shit like sharks can smell blood. And her in particular likes to bury her nose deep into that, very much to my annoyance.

 

“How’s Eren?” Yup, like I said. 

 

“Looking good.” 

 

“Uh-huh. Tell me something I don’t know, mister! What I meant was: Did you have some lovey-dovey eye contact today? Was it hot? Have you two finally decided on a wedding date yet?” 

 

And she is even enjoying herself! Luckily I seem to be saved by my cat who, in a heroic attempt to distract my nosy friend, jumps up onto her lap, meowing and curiously looking at the food. 

 

“Do you want to eat something nice, too?” I ask her, her nose already sniffling curiously at a California roll in front of her. 

 

Hanji laughs. “Should I give her something? I’m stuffed for now anyway.” 

 

She and her power eating skills. “Please. There must still be some bags of her favourite in the usual drawer.” Leaving her plate and trash on the table (why am I not surprised?) she scuffles into the kitchen and scoops out the cat food for Lizzy. 

 

“So…what kind of film did you bring?” I ask as soon as I hear the munching sounds of a monster that apparently has been close to starvation. What a greedy, little minx. But Hanji got distracted for the moment, so I owe her every little crump of delicious happiness that she can get. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Again some music you could listen to. [Air](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=99myH1orbs4) always is a good choice for background tunes while working.
> 
> [This is the snickering elf](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=4kd5ev6Xlx4) Levi has as a ringtone.
> 
> UPDATE: I drew the ground plot of Levi's flat and put it into an [additional chapter](http://archiveofourown.org/works/5616256/chapters/13357411) at the end of this fan fiction. If you are curious.


	3. Chapter 3

I wave at the last shoppers for today and turn over the 'open' sign on our door. It is always a delight to close after a busy day instead of a calm one with almost no customers at all. Relief washes over me: We managed yet another day. And quite a good one of that. I quickly step out into the cold to get down the Union Jack and almost slip on a frozen puddle of ice. 

 

Back inside I shake off the small fright from nearly having my face kiss the freezing ground, and a few snow flakes fall out of my hair before I store away the flag for the next day. 

 

I can hear Mikasa and Armin in the back, giggling over something, and I hurry over to join their discussion. How nice it is to work with a family like this! 

 

We’ve been together since childhood, Mikasa being some kind of a sister to me, since my parents adopted her when she was very little, and Armin living right across the street. We went to school together and when things became very bad with the health of Armin’s grandfather during secondary school he mostly stayed at our place, too. Sooner or later we were inseparable and until this day I guess we somehow still are. We even came all the way to Germany together and have been sharing an apartment to split rent and avoid to suddenly live alone. 

 

Some might find it odd for three almost-thirty-year-olds to share their whole life, flat and work included. For us it has always been natural this way. Each of us has their own room and we are used to live with one another. We care about each other, sometimes even more than other families seem to do, so why not ending up as we did? 

 

“Hey, would you like to go to the cinema tonight?” Armin asks. “It has been a while since we last went out after work.”

 

“Sure. I would like that.” I reply and we wrap up in our winter clothes before heading out. 

 

We stop at a crêpe place nearby to eat something warm and I cherish mine with a chocolate cream filling that can only be described as ‘sinful’. Armin and Mikasa start talking about the day at the shop. We got to meet a few new customers today that already seem to become new regulars. 

 

You see it on their faces when they step in and receive their cup up tea to taste. It is like a spark, accompanied by a silent smile and easy conversation. We love to meet new people, one of the many reasons we decided to open the shop back then. Has it already been two years since then? Time flies. 

 

“Ymir bought another new cup today,” Mikasa laughs. 

 

“Oh no, not again!” Armin moans and I chuckle into the last bites of my crêpe. “How many did she break already?”

 

“Well, I don’t know,” I add. “But if she keeps on doing this we’ll be able to live on it. She’s lucky they are still making those, these are her favourite.”

 

“Should we start giving her discount on the china?” Armin again. He honestly is one of the nicest guys I’ve ever known.

 

Mikasa shakes her head. “No, not yet. And who knows? Maybe she’ll learn?” 

 

“Yeah, right!” I giggle. 

 

I like Ymir. But she is some kind of a chaos freak most of the time. Mayhem follows her wherever she goes and so do broken things. Like her most favourite pink Royal Albert cup with little flowers on the inside and golden ornaments around the edges. Ymir might be tough as a rock, but she has a weakness for tacky and cute things. They are her kryptonite. Yes, when she saw the cups in our shop for the very first time, it was squeaky-happy love at first sight and although she keeps on breaking them, she sheds tears over every single casualty and directly comes to us, blurred mascara running all over her freckles, crying hiccups and everything, to buy supplies. 

 

“How did it happen this time?” I ask.

 

“According to her it’s Marco’s fault,” Mikasa sais into her red scarf. “He came to visit for afternoon tea apparently, made her laugh, and that’s when she stumbled and crushed against the table which threw it on the floor. She said the cup was still warm when it fell.” 

 

Armin snickers out of pity. He has a weakness for Ymir, too. We all have. You can’t just not like her soft core, if you happen to spot it once, even if it is deeply hidden behind thick layers of sarcasm and her obvious badass attitude.

 

“It still seems to me as if she accomplished it all on her own, though.” 

 

“Anyway. Christa is coming home from her business trip. Ymir asked if we would like to have an early Christmas dinner with them and the other guys in two weeks.” 

 

“Oh, how lovely,” Armin says and I agree. “We haven’t seen each other for so long.”

 

“I’ll tell her we’ll be there.” 

 

My crêpe is finished, way too soon, and I pinch a bite from Mikasa’s apple sauce and cinnamon filled one. She never minds and even leaves me another bite before finishing it completely today. I wrap my left arm around her shoulders and we three keep on walking towards the cinema. 

 

One happy little family of tea fanatic dorks.

 

\- - - 

 

We decide on a Blockbuster, the biggest box of salty popcorn we can get, and a huge coke. They are already letting us in and we snuggle into our seats, Armin in the middle, holding the popcorn and the coke. 

 

Yes, we share food, too. 

 

Mikasa still has her scarf wrapped around her. I have to smile and think about how much has happened since I gave it to her when we still were children. She always wears it…even during the summer. The fabric must be almost worn out by now. _Maybe I should get her a new one for Christmas_ I wonder; I don’t want her to be cold. I on the other hand am relieved as I free myself from my scarf and winter jacket.

 

“Did you notice the look on Levi’s face today?” Armin suddenly asks in concern. “He looked so tired.”

 

_Damn!_ Not that topic, please. Not now! I just finally managed to get him out of my head for one second. I already went to the loo a minute ago and can not escape. No customers around, no sudden distraction I can come up with… 

 

“Hard to tell with that grumpy face of his,” I reply shortly, glad that the lights are dimmed and my face is still a little pink from the cold outside. Still, Armin is right. He did look terribly tired and grim today. Even more than usual. Is it creepy for me to have a thing for the weary dark circles under his eyes and his dark gaze, that constantly make me worried if he is okay…?

 

“Yeah, but today it was bad, man. I hope, he is okay.”

 

“I’m sure it is just the Christmas work piling up, Armin.” Mikasa throws in. “He always has his hands full in November and is awfully worn out by December. The last years were exactly the same. It’s not like he is in our business where you have Christmas shopping right to the last minute. Most of his work for this year surely has to be finished by now. ” 

 

My hands become sweaty in the following silence while I do my best to act totally natural and inconspicuous. 

 

Armin seems relieved. “It felt strange to not have him around every other week. It’s good to have him back. I knew he would love that Darjeeling though. It is perfect for him.” He seems a little smug and an almost too confident grin appears on his features.

 

I reach out to him to get a big hand full of crispy popcorn. It is still warm. SCORE! Nevertheless I throw one small hand full at him. 

 

“What was that for?” he chuckles.

 

“To wipe that hideous self-satisfied grin off your face. Blowing one’s own horn doesn’t sound good, you know.”

 

He sticks his tongue out at me and both of us blast out in laughter at the same time. 

 

“Still. I am happy he likes it.” If you ask me, Armin indeed is sweet. “By the way I’m very sorry I stole your thunder with the herbal infusions, mate!” …but sometimes he can be really annoying at the same time. He winks at me and I hope my eyes do not glare as much as I would like to let them to. They would burn him to ashes right here and now. “But as a matter of fact: He honestly asked,” he finally concludes. Still grinning. 

 

“Yeah, yeah.” I try to stay casual but his words made my mind go into overdrive mode already. _How much does Armin know?_ I decide to carefully poke at it. “He is the one who had to listen to your obnoxious rambling about it, isn't he? So why should I care?” 

 

See? Casual as hell.

 

Now they are both looking at me in disbelief. “Oh, come on Eren.” 

 

Great. I seem to have awakened the big fat bear in winter hibernation. And he is fixing his terrifying stare on me. Fuck! I grind my teeth in resignation, knowing there is no way for me to talk myself out of this one. Not now anyways.

 

Armin finally lets me off the hook with another cheerful chuckle. “Man, you both got it so bad.”

 

I’m sure my head is so red by now, that it must be glowing. Instead of trying to come up with a smart thing to say I simply stuff more popcorn into my mouth. The curtain opens at last to release me from the teasing glares of my family, and they turn to face the screen again. But not without obviously rolling their eyes at me first. 

 

As the advertisement starts and we make stupid jokes at the spots like we always do a deep sigh escapes my chest. I miss the good old Marlboro advertisements with the cowboys. What they show us these days is rubbish compared to that.

 

We sit through the teasers and trailers and as the film starts to roll my mind has already sailed off far away. To a very fascinating man with the most beautiful voice one could ever hear. Just thinking about it sends shivering waves all over my body.

 

Armin is right. I’ve got it so bad.  Of course I’ve been noticing his evasive stares as well and know what they mean. I can feel them consuming me, burning my skin. But I always thought he would make the first move. And if I am totally honest with myself, I am not sure if I am cut out to endure yet another year like this, waiting and longing. Fantasizing. Doing nothing more.

 

I have absolutely no idea what happens on the screen. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The china Ymir adores and sadly seems to break all the time is [this one](http://www.royalalbert.eu/shop/by-collection/rose-confetti/rose-confetti-vintage-teacup-and-saucer)…just if you’re curious.


	4. Chapter 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Going down memory lane.

It must have been quite around the time we opened our shop when we first met. Everything in the Tearoom was still new. The paint was still breathing out its freshness, the floor was spotless, and we were still a bit nervous about everything. Correction: intensely nervous. On my part at least.

 

Would everything go well? Would we survive for even one year? Did we do everything properly with the public authorities? Would we even get one customer a week? Or a day? Does Trost even have any interest in tea at all? Or is it a town full of tea haters that just wait for poor English vendors to open a lovely shop just to stomp it down to the ground and make fun of us afterwards?

 

At first everything was a little slow, of course. Pedestrians peeking through the windows from outside, wondering about coming in or not. Seeing three crazy-eyed people at the counter, eagerly waving at every potential customer who showed just the tiniest bit of interest, might not actually have helped our cause. But well. We only did that for about a week. 

 

Okay… maybe a considerable while longer. 

 

Some people actually stepped in and were pleasantly surprised when we greeted them with a cup of tea and the offer to join us at the counter for a little chat. And, as it always is, the word spread slowly but still, it spread. The people loved how ‘authentic’ we were with our waving solar queen in the corner, the British interior and our honest interest in tea. They learned we actually do know what we are talking about and shyness was soon washed away to make space for wonderful discussions. 

 

After a while we recognised the first faces coming back from time to time and we were ecstatic about our first regular customers. 

 

One of those were Christa and Ymir. They came in one sunny day, the tall, dark, and discontent-looking Ymir being dragged into our shop by tiny, cheerful, blond girl with friendly, lively eyes. They sat down at the counter, Christa as fresh as a daisy and happily telling us that she heard about us from a friend. That was about when Ymir, first awfully quiet, was handed a cup of tea. 

 

She looked at the tacky pink and golden cup in her hands, steaming tea (it must have been a black tea, some afternoon mix probably) in it, and a big fat grin suddenly began to spread over her face. It was as if someone had switched on a light. She drank and fell in love. With the tea, with us, and with the China…which she sadly keeps on destroying with her clumsiness. 

 

“Baby girl!” Her yell as she turned to Christa was filled with delight and pure happiness. “We’ve got to buy those. I want to carry them home and love them forever. Please, pretty-please, tell me, we will get some of them!”

 

This was Armin’s cue to break out in laughter. From the moment Ymir had walked in he had been waiting, almost hiding in the back, officially scared out of his mind by such a grumpy person. The cup story was a real icebreaker. The dark girl grinned happily at my best friend, freckles dancing all over her now so beautifully beaming face, and reached out her hand. 

 

“Please, call me Ymir. And you are?” 

 

It truly was the beginning of a great friendship. Ymir and Christa started to pay us shorts visits every week or so, whenever they could make it. They would pop by on afternoons for a short break or on the weekends for her regular fixes of new tea and—in Ymir’s case—cup supplies. Just for the record: The first one didn’t live one week, before she smashed it while carrying it around and tripping. 

 

Christa told us later that Ymir had buried the remains in their garden and seemingly still worships it with infused tea leaves from time to time.

 

But the first afternoon they stayed very long, buying and munching biscuits in between and they even managed to pull Mikasa out of her mostly quiet contemplation. Soon she laughed as much as Armin and I had and that’s when we decided to also put out samples of the biscuits for our guests. With the help of a few crumbs of sugar and butter everything just seemed to be a little brighter. 

 

They just had left when Mikasa poked my arm and nodded to the windows. She was back to her calm self again, but I could tell she was still smiling inside. I loved Ymir just for accomplishing that. 

 

“What is his problem?” she asked. Now a small frown forming on her forehead.

 

I peeked outside, trying to see, what she meant, but I didn’t really have to. The door opened with a cheerful ringing of the bell we had just installed, and in came someone who was even more grim looking than Ymir when she first stepped into our shop one or two hours ago. 

 

“Hello”, Mikasa greeted almost carefully. “How can we help you?” 

 

“I would like some tea.” His bored sounding voice was more a menace than anything else and dark clouds seemed to gather around him. His eyes looked cool, almost…lonely? I shook my head to clear it and hurried over to prepare a new pot of tea. “Whatever you recommend. I don’t really care what kind.”

 

The sparkling lights in Mikasa’s gaze darkened to become as equally cool. Luckily she stayed polite. “Okay. But it would be a great help to know what you usually prefer so we can come up with a better choice for you.”

 

“It is for a friend, so, like I already said. I don’t mind.” He looked up to her as if he would despise every person taller than him. That seemed to be almost everybody…if I had to guess, even Armin was taller than him. 

 

“Mikasa, I’m sorry, but could you come here for a second, please? I need you in the back.” Armin, aware of the way Mikasa glared by now, came to our rescue. She truly is my most precious human being in the world, but you should never ever let her loose, when she gets angry. It will end ugly. The Texas Chainsaw Massacre is a happy little children’s party compared to my sister when she fully gets started. 

 

And something in his eyes and his cool demeanour told me _he_ was even _worse_.

 

I slightly pushed her forward and turned to the evil little man in front of me. If it wasn’t for that nasty look you might have considered him handsome. Compelling even. “Your friend. Do you happen to know which kind of tea he likes?”

 

“Mostly everything if it is good.” 

 

Well, this was a start. “Okay. What about a British afternoon tea with Darjeeling and Assam? I just brewed it for our customers if you would like to try it?”

 

He sighed, but sat down with an approving nod whilst slipping out of his coat. The first chilly, autumnal cold had been having its grip on us for a few days now.

 

I fetched a cup for him, a simple, white, and fragile Japanese one without a handle or any ornaments, and poured him the hot tea. I had the feeling that, unlike Ymir, he wouldn’t be too happy about having to use our English china. 

 

His frown eased up a bit and I…was lost. He really had nice eyes—if you could see behind all that scariness and dark glaring. His endearing features were a strange mixture of sharp, almost boyish and nevertheless all man. He seemed to be around our age; in his mid-late-twenties, perhaps. His pitch black hair hung loosely around his head in a slight undercut and made his pale skin seem almost translucent. He had dark circles under his eyes but they just made me wonder why he had them and if I could help him to get rid of them. Maybe running my fingertips over them would help…

 

_Wait. What was I thinking right now?_

 

He looked up from the cup and the tiniest smirk made his face lighten up. “That actually is quite a good tea. I think, I will take it. And an additional bag for myself if you don’t mind.” 

 

“A-alright. Sure,” I mumbled and started to fill up two bags. “How much would you like me to fill up for you?”

 

“Make it 50 gram each, please.” And after a second “Is this shortbread?” He now was eagerly pointing at the biscuits we had just displayed for the customers.

 

I tried to smile back at him, feeling an unwanted nervousness slowly but gradually creeping over me. “Yes. It is handmade by a family business in Scotland. Please help yourself if you’d like.”

 

He didn’t hesitate and I caught myself staring at his fingers. They were graceful, and delicate, and carefully held the shortbread while he silently examined it. How would it feel like to be touched by them? _Oh, come on, Yaeger. Get a grip! He is a customer for Heaven’s sake! This is not a date, and besides there is a good chance you will never see him again. Ever. Maybe he isn’t even into men…_ even though I imagined to get that special vibe going on. I sighed quietly. _Why do they always have to be straight?_

 

I struggled to focus my attention back on the afternoon tea. Away from strong hands that seemed to end in even stronger arms. Well built muscles showed under his black shirt and ended in broad shoulders… _The tea, Eren!_

 

I weighed and filled the two bags on the counter, labeled them correctly, what was not as easy as it should have been, and turned back to my new favourite customer. “Anything else you might want?” _Me, perhaps?_

 

“Two boxes of this shortbread, that’s for sure.” More of that subtle grin. There honestly should be a police for that kind of face! It is so not fair to look like that and walk around without a safety warning stapled to his forehead. 

 

“Great.”

 

“So. You’re not from here, are you?”

 

His question didn’t totally surprise me. You can definitely hear our British accent when we talk German, even after all these years we have been living here. “No, we grew up in England. Near London?” 

 

“All three of you?”

 

“Y-yes.”

 

“What nice surprise.” And now he was talking in English. “It really is a small world.” What a perfect London dialect! I felt my heart skip a beat. And all my blood rushed downwards, from my head right into my pants, in one single dreadful second. _Why is this happening to me?_

 

_I’m so screwed._


	5. Chapter 5

It’s December 22nd and the Christmas calm at work has finally settled in. 

 

The product catalogue turned out to be a real pain in the arse: Too many people involved, who all sent me mails but couldn’t decide on the corrections, so the project ended in me changing and back-changing the whole thing all over again. My short temper didn’t quite help the process, but we finally managed to pull ourselves together and come to a solution we are all happy with in the end. And now the catalogue is done and my clients have already left for their sweet, calm Holidays. 

 

I celebrate my first work-free day by staying in my pyjamas all morning long and reading on the couch with the last pot of the Darjeeling I bought two weeks ago. To that I enjoy the chocolate covered lemon biscuits that I had saved for exactly this occasion. It was worth it. 

 

Luckily Hanji hasn’t come upstairs yet, as she usually does in the morning, or else those crumbly shortpastry delights would have been inhaled in a second. I’m thankful that she lets me rest on my own for a few hours. Even if it will be over tomorrow again.

 

Lizzy snuggles right next to me, cutely snoring as always and apparently deeply lost in sweet dreams. Her whiskers tremble from time to time and she begins to make little sounds distracting me from my novel. She’s probably dreaming about hunting mice or birds. Or just about an empty feeding dish that evil fake-me didn’t fill up.

 

My own dreams these days aren’t that simple at all and filled with bright green eyes laughing at me. Not that I didn't have enough problems with sleeping as it is, even without this man intruding into my subconscious night life and haunting me there too. 

 

I stare at the almost emptied tea pot on the table, daring it to fill itself up again. Effortless. 

 

Seems like I can not escape that place any longer. Not without any tea in the house over Christmas. I do have some sencha left, but it is a very high quality one for special occasions, which I don’t truly want to ‘waste’ for daily use. Even my morning matcha ration has dried out today. I definitely have to get some more.

 

Ordering supplies online—with the shop being just a few minutes away and all this free time now—would be like accepting a defeat to myself. Besides. If I am totally honest with myself, I want to be there. Seeing him, talking to him, hearing his voice and watching him move always lifts my mood, even though I still don’t know how he does that exactly.

 

My gaze turns to the ceiling, desperately searching for an answer. How am I supposed to get out of a mess like this? It’s been so long since my last date and it didn’t go well. None of them did in the end, but the last one has been exceptionally horrific. 

 

Maybe Hanji is right. She mostly is. Maybe I just have to put myself out there after all. But how? A life full of not shaping my flirting skills has made me insecure in this field and I don’t want this to end badly as well. 

 

Yet I am so sick and tired of living alone, like a crazy old cat lady, and with a crush that has been going on for years. Okay, maybe more like a horny, grumpy old man that will never leave his house again and just keeps on complaining about everything. He lives alone, has just a handful of friends, the best one thriving in chaos, and he will die pathetically alone, too, found by his neighbour and and eaten by Alsatians. 

 

So much for positive thoughts.

 

Hearing that compelling chuckle in my dreams doesn’t exactly improve my situation either. It makes me want more of that when I wake up. It makes me want to drown in it. I want to kiss him until his laughter would turn into moans. A voice that breathlessly screams my name, sending goosebumps all over me… 

 

_Okay, old man. Time for a shower and your dreaded shopping experience._ I stroke Lizzy’s fur, calming her dreams with my hand gently patting her head, and move into the bathroom to give into dreams of my own. 

 

_\- - -_

 

The shop is filled with customers when I arrive and their voices are making the whole place buzz like a bee hive. Cheerful chattering greets me and Armin’s golden head appears behind a group of women giggling over a cup that reads ‘Now Panic & Freak Out’. 

 

“Hey Levi.”

 

“Hi Armin.” I wave back at him, shoot a quick glance at Eren at the register, and turn to the counter to my left were Mikasa is talking to a group of customers whilst filling an Asian looking pot, a kyusu, with dried green leaves. 

 

“Hi Levi. Nice to see you. Would you like a cup of sencha? It’s one with added matcha and genmaicha. Very nice.”

 

“Yes, thanks. That would be splendid.” 

 

One of the men next to me friendly glances at me, moves his jacket from the seat next to him and I gladly sit down on the bar stool. He turns back to his friend, a grim looking guy with a very weird hair cut that looks like he bleached his head to just let his hair grow out again, and keeps on chatting. “Come on Jean, I already told Ymir we both would be coming.”

 

“I was just hoping for a quiet evening before we visit my folks for Christmas.” I hear the other guy. Even his voice sounds grim. “Just sitting on the couch, watching telly, and doing nothing else.”

 

“We do that every night.”

 

“Then go alone…?”

 

“But I don’t want to go without you. It will be fun.” Silence. “Please, Jean?” 

 

I hear a sigh. “Okay.”

 

“Really?” the guy next to me beams so happily that I wonder if he is is real and unconsciously scoop away from him a bit. Even his freckles all over his cheekbones seem too joyful to be true. 

 

“Yeah… But only if you’ll drive.”

 

“I will. Thank you so much Jean!”

 

His friend mumbles something and wildly ruffles his hair just as a timer is beeping, and Mikasa turns to the water to pour it over the tea in the Asian teapot. “I’m glad you two will be there, too. It’s going to be such a nice evening. I haven’t seen Christa for so many weeks, Ymir must really long for having her back home.”

 

“She’s so nervous,” the guy next to me says fondly. “She has been texting me all day. She even tried to cook.” That Jean guy snorts roughly at that comment. 

 

“She did?” Mikasa asks, pouring the tea into small white cups. “How did that go?”

 

He takes his cup and takes a sip. “Thank you, Mikasa. Well, the soup burnt, don’t ask me how, and Ymir sent me a whole novel about smoke detectors and how much she hated them with ‘the force of ten thousand suns’. So my guess would be: It went just perfect.” 

 

Usually I’m not the one to judge people. And I think I know this Ymir already. But how the fuck does one manage to burn bloody _soup?_

 

Now he turns to me and I cannot help but frown at his friendliness. “Hi, I’m Marco by the way.” Seriously? How nice _is_ this guy? 

 

“Levi.”

 

“So great to meet you, Levi. And this is Jean.” He looks at his friend who just lets out another one of his bearish sounds. 

 

“Hello!” Friendly people tend to make me queasy, so I try to keep it simple. 

 

“Do you come here often?” Marco wants to know. At least he doesn’t seem to be one of those obtrusive guys who loves to go touchy-feely with strangers. I ease up a bit.

 

“Yes, Levi is one of our regulars,” Mikasa adds to that with a silent smile. I gratefully let her do the talking, drink my tea, and reach out for a biscuit. I need it.

 

“Well that’s nice. You’re from England, too?” 

 

“Yes,” I mumble and after his eyes eagerly watch me I reluctantly add “from London”.

 

“That’s great! I always wanted to go there myself one day. Especially since these guys here talk so much about it. Jean, can we go there next year? That would be nice.”

 

“Humph.” Apparently this guy speaks as much as I do. But when he turns to Marco his dreamy look gives him away. It almost makes me envious. I want to have someone to look at like this too. And I desperately try not to turn around now. 

 

“How’s work been treating you? You look better since we last saw you.” Mikasa almost appears to be worried. 

 

“Thanks. It seems like I’m done for this year and it is nice to do nothing for once in a while.”

 

“I can imagine that. We’re glad you’re doing better.” 

 

“Your tea helped a lot, actually.”

 

“That sounds like you need a refill?” Her dimples deepen in delight. 

 

“Yes, please. Again from the Darjeeling and the ‘Relax’ mix. 100 gram each would be perfect. And another 100 gram of your Assam, please.”

 

“Of course.”

 

Armin appears out of nowhere, laughing at me, as always. “Good to see you Levi. I was worried, when I last saw you, but you look better. Work done for this year, huh?”

 

“Yes, it seems so. How are you doing? Any plans for Christmas?”

 

“Not absolutely,” Armin replies. “We’re having dinner with friends tomorrow and then just relax, you know. Maybe we will visit the family over the Holidays. Carla and Grisha would be happy if we could make it. And London is so lovely at this time of the year. Do you have plans?” 

 

“No. Just hanging around with Hanji and my cat, I guess. My friend Erwin invited me for New Year’s Eve but he knows I hate parties.” 

 

Armin chuckles. “Well, we will be having a small celebration here, too. So if you change your mind, you’re welcome to join us.” Mikasa nods approvingly. I can’t shake the feeling they want to play matchmakers. I won’t let them. 

 

“Thank you, Armin. I’ll keep it in mind.”

 

Mikasa closes the bags with my tea. “I’ll bring it over to the register, Levi. Feel free to look around if you need something else.” 

 

“Thank you, Mikasa.” 

 

Armin is already busy talking to Marco and Jean about their upcoming dinner, so I leave my seat at the counter to collect a couple of biscuits to help me over the next few weeks—or days, if I am totally honest with myself—, a portion of fresh matcha, a box with Christmas crackers and a bag of Japanese green tea for Hanji. Her favourite. 

 

I move to the register, and therefore to Eren, and immediately feel my heart beating faster. I really have to learn to deal with this some day. But not today. What should I say anyway? _“Hey, I just jerked off with you in my mind, would you care going out for a drink with me some time?”_ So not creepy. At all! _“You look hot! Can we make out?” “Want to see my stamp collection?” “I’m horny. Please help me!”_ Even in my mind all of this sounds so absurd that I can hear Hanji’s hilarious giggle, and I pull my thoughts back to reality. 

 

I place everything onto the counter and force myself to look back at him. “Hi. Do you guys still wrap gifts?”

 

“Hi. Yup, we do. Armin?” 

 

“Yes, what’s up, Eren?” 

 

I thankfully smile at Armin. “Could you gift-wrap the sencha please? It’s for Hanji.”

 

“Sure”. He leaves for the personnel department with the present-to-be and I can hear the rustling of paper. 

 

While Armin is busy, Eren types my purchases into the register, whistling to the tunes out of the radio—today it is Lana Del Rey—his arms moving smoothly under his white shirt, his hair looking so soft that all I want to do is touch it, and how the hell is it possible to look so cute and sexy at the same time? My fantasy is lost in Happy Levi Land again. _He is so close. This is your chance! Just take this one step_ …

 

“There you go,” Armin interrupts my thoughts, hands a neatly wrapped box to Eren, who is already busy with packing my other stuff into a shopping bag, and moves on to greet the group who just stepped into the shop. 

 

“I’ll include a Christmas card for you. We give one of those to all our regulars this year,” Eren mentions with a grin before adding an envelope to the bag. “We will be closed over Christmas starting the day after tomorrow at noon. So if you need anything else for the Holidays, make sure to stop by before that.”

 

“Thank you,” I nod, wondering if his words are really as ambiguous as they sound to me or if this is just my imagination going wild. “I think I have enough to survive for a few weeks. But I will let Hanji know. Merry Christmas, Eren.”

 

“Merry Christmas to you, too.” His grin gets even wider now and I feel my stomach turn. 

 

Slipping into my coat I wave at him, say goodbye to Mikasa and Armin, wishing them happy Holidays as well, and leave the still buzzing shop. 

 

\- - - 

 

The way home is short but when I step into my flat my ears are already cold, my nose is red and running, and I want to curse at winter again. Maybe I should think about spending Christmas in the sun next year. Somewhere warm and sunny. Where I don’t need a thick coat, no scarf, no gloves and maybe even spend the days in flip flops at the beach… Maybe Hanji would like to come, too. But all I would be able to think about is that the ocean reminded me of his eyes anyway.

 

Lizzy lazily blinks at me from the couch where I left her. Being a cat must be hard. I walk up to her to let her sniffle at my cold winter scented hands, before I pat her warm, fluffy head. She shakes off the sudden coolness and yawns widely, before snuggling back into the cushion to catch more mice in her dreams. 

 

I start to empty the shopping bag and stumble across the promised Christmas card in an envelope with my name in curvy, hand written letters on it. It contains a folded card with a robin motive, a few tacky, but fitting, glitter spots framing the drawn bird. Simple but classy. They really know what I like and I smile at this thought. I flip the card open.

 

_'Will you just keep staring at me from afar or are you actually going to ask me out one day? Because with that grumpy face of yours, I definitely won’t ask you. Maybe this helps:'_

 

A number. My heart starts to race. My mouth dries out out of nowhere and my mind threatens to go into shock. I read again. This is definitely his number! I quickly read the rest of the card.

 

_'Anyway. Merry Christmas…if convenient._

_E._

 

_PS I like your arse.'_

 

I break out in laughter.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Eren whistles to [this song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=OZubY2tW2yo&list=PLhHPg1y9hXn_W8fiAOnIBu71MJeco3KPT&index=8).


	6. Chapter 6

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It is so good to have a friend. And donuts!

I stare at the card for what appears to be an eternity, reading it over and over again. Still the same words and digits. Duh! 

 

My whole body turns hot, then cold, and then even hotter again, and despite my sheer amusement I feel a small panic tighten my chest. What should I do? Would he honestly like to go on a date with me? Doesn’t he know me? Has he SEEN me? 

 

_'I like your arse.'_

 

A sudden knock on the door makes me jump in surprise and I don’t have any time to hide the card—or my feelings—before I hear keys turning in my door lock and Hanji’s unkempt head appears on the threshold to my flat. 

 

“Hello, mister Scrooge, I just bought some yummy-yummy donuts and thought you might want s– Holy shit, you look happy!” 

 

Hanji almost never freaks out but when she does she looks scary as fuck. Her hair seems to get some life of its own, swirling around her, her anyway pale face turns white as a sheet, and her eyes become so big behind those thick glasses that they seem to almost pop out of their sockets. She drops the donuts, rushes over to me and I am so deeply lost in thoughts and at the same time fascinated by her whole appearance that I actually forget to even think about complaining about her not leaving her shoes in the entrance and making a salty, wintery, wet mess on my floor. 

 

I try to say something, but finally decide to just hand her the card. She reads it, gapes at me for a second, and ends up exactly as I did a minute ago by breaking out into sheer laughter. 

 

“You wouldn’t have anything to do with this, would you?” I ask, not really believing it, but with her you never truly know. She just keeps on laughing, hands on her belly, tears in her eyes. 

 

I want to kick her. Only a little. Just enough to wipe that malicious pleasure off her face. “Come on, Hanji, tell me you do not have anything to do with this.” My voice is threatening her, my infernal glare at its best. But she isn’t afraid at all. She doesn’t scream a bit. She doesn’t even seem to care. Damn it, we’ve been knowing each other too well. 

 

Eventually she stops for a second, wipes her cheeks with a sleeve and shakes her head with a giggling “no”. 

 

“Promise me, Hanji!”

 

“I solemnly swear on Beane,” she hiccups “I had and have nothing to do with this and I am so _thrilled_ right now. This must be the best Christmas present ever! And by the way: That cute, little bum of yours truly is hot! I’m so happy, he noticed.” 

 

“Stop distracting! How can you swear on that dog? He is dead. And it stank. You said so, too.”

 

“How dare you! He was precious. And it doesn’t change anything: I still swear on him. Why on earth did you think I am behind this anyway? This is so very much not my style. And we both have to admit: I couldn’t have done it better. Wait! Let me…” she rummages around in her pockets to get out her phone. _Click!_ “This is so perfect, look at your stupid stuck-on-your-face grin! I’ll send it to you so you can cherish it. You can thank me later. Uh! I need to show this to Erwin on New Year’s. He will crack up so hard!” 

 

“You evil bitch!” I lunge at her but she sidesteps and her phone is in her hand so high above her head, I will never reach it. Why does everybody have to be so fucking tall? “Did you just…”

 

“I did. And see? It worked. God how you always freak me out when you laugh. I’m so glad you’re back to your usual nasty self again.” Her big eyes flash back at the card to read it once more.

 

“The words don’t change when you re-read it. I checked. Repeatedly.” 

 

“Sure you did. Oh, this is epic. What are you going to do?” And now her grin becomes vicious. “Are you going to call him? Will you text him silly stuff? Will you junk-mail him? Uhh-uh, will you have embarrassing gay phone sex sessions late at night? I know you want to.” She is wiggling her eyebrows.

 

How can this demon of a woman be my best friend? “Oh, shut up!” How eloquent. 

 

She hops on the kitchen counter. “Honestly, Levi. Why are you still hesitating? He seems to be an endearing guy. He knows you, you know him. You have been making googely eyes at each other for…I don’t know how long now. Everyone noticed. It could work out.”

 

“Fine. Let’s play this game.” I sigh, suddenly feeling very tired. “How?”

 

“How should I know? But if you just could cut that whole shy virgin facade and be yourself, that would be a start.” I give her my most loathsome glare. “That’s the spirit! Anyway. You can read, right, Sherlock? He wants to go on a date with you. So do it. Go somewhere decent, wear something handsome, and lure him in. Use your natural charm.”

 

“Tch! Right.” 

 

My mind is gradually starting to work again and I finally take care of my almost forgotten purchases, storing the shopping bag with Hanji’s present between the cleaning supplies under the sink. She will never look there voluntarily. Not even if I pay her.

 

“I think it is a wonderful idea. Also, Eren knows your scary face and how to deal with it. He even seems to like it…along with your gorgeous backside.” She hands me the card back. I roll my eyes though I have to admit that she’s got a point. 

 

About my face that is.

 

“But how should I ask him out in the first place? Everything that comes to my mind seems so pathetic and desperate to me,” I contemplate and move to the entrance to finally close the door again. It is getting cold and my heart is set on Lizzy. I pick up the donuts that Hanji carelessly dropped before and carry them into the kitchen. 

 

“You _are_ pathetic and desperate. And as I see it, he made it very easy for you: He already asked you out without asking you out. It is so sweet I could puke, actually. So just pick a date and a place and tell him.” 

 

By now the donuts are all arranged on a plate and I prepare some Assam for us. _Just pick a date and place, huh?_ I should be able to do that. And an idea already starts to take form in my mind. 

 

Hanji reaches out for one of the pastries and I am suddenly aware of the increasing puddles on my floor. “Damn it, woman! Could you please remove you shoes first? You’re making my kitchen filthy.” She just smiles at that and stuffs the whole donut into her mouth in one piece, chocolate frosting everywhere on her face and hands now, her eyes challenging me to stop her. I feel myself shudder. Seems like I am back on save and familiar territory. 

 

_Uh, this is going to be fun!_ Hopefully.


	7. Chapter 7

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Waiting…

It is Wednesday. 21 hours and about 40 minutes since he left, the card in the bag. I haven’t heard from him since and to be honest…it’s scaring the hell out of me. Did I accidentally swap his card? Did Armin or Mikasa? Maybe even on purpose? No, they would not. And his name was on it. I checked. I was there, so I should know. Right? Right.

 

Did he not read the card? Maybe he just threw it away? No, he isn’t that disrespectful.

 

Did he read it? Oh my god…he did, didn’t he? Fuck, I terrified Levi. He’s going to kill me. My gravestone will say _“He just wanted a date. Sadly he poked The Dragon.”_ Capital “T”, capital “D”… something like this.

 

I have been edgy all day and constantly checking my phone. I even let Armin and Mikasa call _and_ text me just to be sure that it still worked. Twice. And tried it a few times on my own with the business phone after that. Sleeplessness this night hadn’t really helped my cause either and now I have been drinking so much matcha today to keep me awake that additionally to my constant jumpiness I have a nice and strong caffeine rush going on. Great!

 

Why hasn’t he called yet? Was I too blunt? Was it too lame? I probably should have left out that last part on the card. Another one for my gravestone: _“Don’t make arse puns.They will kill you!”_

 

I am totally startled when Mikasa is suddenly standing in front of me, shoving a bar of chocolate between my teeth. “Eat!” she orders me. “You’re making me twitchy and Armin is worried too. You haven’t eaten all day.” 

 

“I’m too nervous.” I nibble at the chocolate, and the cocoa paired with sugary bliss actually helps calming me down a bit and makes me feel slightly better. Professor Lupin was right after all. “Thanks, Mikasa.” 

 

“Still no word?”

 

“Nope. None.” I check my phone. Again.

 

“Give him time. I’m sure you just surprised him a bit.” She nudges me softly. “But he will answer. I’m sure.” And with that she is gone again, off to attend to customers that seize our last opening days before Christmas. 

 

The shop is filled with people, but I can’t really concentrate on work. So I try to make myself scarce with the customers, filling up the tea canisters, cleaning the used cups, scraping clotted cream and marmalade onto Armin’s home baked scones to display them next to the register, gift-wrapping for our shoppers, making errands. That kind of stuff. Whatever keeps me busy. Luckily there’s plenty to do in the background today anyway.

 

I feel my phone buzz in my pants and my heart jumps right into my throat, beating in anticipation. I glance at the display and feel my whole body deflate again. 

 

**From: Ymir**  
**oi, folks. just a reminder for tonight. the loveliest christa is cooking her sweet ass off, so please be here at 8 pm so it doesn’t go to waste. i will make your life hell if she cries over spoiled food.**

 

Oh right, we’re all having plans for tonight. Usually the thought of Christa’s cooking skills and an evening with our usual group of friends is a happy one. Today, however, it only makes me sad. 

 

A second buzz.

 

**From: Ymir  
** **uh, and yeah: don’t drink and drive. the streets are icy these days.**

 

The phone buzzes again.

 

**From: Marco  
** **Can we help or bring anything? Looking forward to it!**

 

Another buzz. Oh, dear! This will go on forever now…

 

**From: Berthold  
** **Thanks Ymir. See you later.**

 

I switch off the alarm of my phone, letting the flood of massages—that I know will come—flow in, finish my chocolate, and go back to washing the tea cups for our customers. After drying I return them to the shop, placing them next to the counter at the entrance where they belong. It sure is full in here today. I open two new boxes of biscuits to taste, help Armin with a big purchase, and go back to the personnel department to make myself another cup of matcha before I check the silly digital conversation of our friends. 

 

28 new messages. Probably increasing. Why do simple notes always turn into an avalanche with these guys? It’s not like we don’t see each other in a couple of hours anyway. I take a sip of my tea and start to scroll.

 

**From: Ymir  
just move your own lazy arses over here, be on time, and don’t make me regret inviting you. **

 

**From: Marco  
Love you, too. (: **

 

**From: Ymir  
i know, candy cakes. **

 

**From: Jean  
Seriously? Over the phone too? **

 

**From: Ymir  
you’re just jealous. **

 

**From: Jean  
The hell I am.**

 

**From: Ymir  
uh-huhhh!**

 

**From: Jean  
Nu-huhh!! **

 

**From: Connie  
Yes, bitch fight! What did we miss? **

 

**From: Ymir  
jean told me he loves me and wants to bear my babies.**

 

**From: Connie  
Awesome! **

 

**From: Marco  
Guys?**

 

**From: Jean  
WHAT?**

 

**From: Connie  
Tonight is gonna rock! **

 

**From: Reiner  
Go for it Jean! **

 

**From: Jean  
Fuck you! Marco is the only one entitled to my babies.**

 

**From: Marco  
This is so embarrassing…**

 

**From: Ymir  
don’t you all have work to do?**

 

**From: Marco  
Yeah…**

 

**From: Reiner  
No.**

 

**From: Berthold  
Nope.**

 

**From: Jean  
Umm, you started this? And no, not really…**

 

**From: Connie  
Work?**

 

**From: Unknown  
I’ll pick you up at your shop, 7 pm tomorrow. **

 

**From: Berthold  
We’ll pick up Annie and have two seats left. Connie? Sasha?**

 

**From: Unknown  
Wear something nice. **

 

**From: Connie  
thanks, man! That would be great.**

 

**From: Marco  
Mikasa, Eren, Armin? Do you guys want a lift, too? Jean and I could pick you up round 7.45 pm?**

 

You honestly can not not like Marco! I start to type a reply.

 

1 new message. Oh, come on, guys…!

 

**From: Unknown  
Have fun with your friends tonight. See you tomorrow.**

 

_Huh?_

 

I’m confused for a second. And then I freeze. No way! I scroll back. No way, no way! Is this really happening? I don’t have any idea what to answer, so…

 

**From: Eren  
Would you like to reveal where you’re going to take me?**

 

**From: Levi  
No. **

 

**From: Levi  
Otherwise it wouldn’t be a surprise, would it?**

 

**From: Eren  
Okay, I’m intrigued. **

 

My heart is racing at full speed. My hands are shaking, and sweating, and my brain feels like it is about to explode. And it could be the caffeine, but only it is not (at least not only)! This is truly happening. Right now. _Tomorrow_. Whatever! My legs want to stop doing what they are supposed to do and I sit down, only to realise I’m too excited to stay put, so I stand up again, knees wobbling.

 

**From: Levi  
Good. Until tomorrow then?**

 

I start to write. And in defence… I honestly can’t help it. 

 

**From: Eren  
As you wish. **

 

Biting on my lip and squeezing my eyes shut I hit the send button before I can change my mind and wait for a whole minute if he replies. 

 

Nothing. 

 

Either he didn’t get the pathetic and so-geeky-it-should-hurt reference or I finally managed to give him a stroke. Or something else…what do I know? I can still feel my heart beating in my throat. My stomach is churning. Tiny butterflies are crap compared to this! 

 

Still nothing. 

 

I have a date. With Levi. Oh my god! This really _is_ happening.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do you know [The Princess Bride?](http://www.goodreads.com/book/show/21787.The_Princess_Bride) It might be good for knowing the meaning of Eren’s last text. If you don't happen to know it yet: With "as you wish" Westley actually tells Buttercup [something else…](https://www.goodreads.com/quotes/162166-i-ve-been-saying-it-so-long-to-you-you-just).


	8. Chapter 8

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The dinner party.

Eventually I manage to calm down enough to text Marco we would be happy to be picked up. And everything after that seems to be blurry somehow. 

 

To say that I am beaming like a stupid moron for the rest of the day would be a big understatement. Armin grins widely as he sees me emerging from the back of the shop, even Mikasa giggles in obvious relief, and I can only grin back at them. 

 

The afternoon rushes past me and soon we find ourselves out on the street in front of our shop, waiting for our ride to Ymir’s and Christa’s place. We don’t have to be very patient. Just after a minute Marco’s red car comes around the corner and we squeeze into the back seats. 

 

“Well, somebody looks jubilant today,” Marco states after catching my goofy expression in the driving mirror. “What happened? Tell us everything!”

 

“He’s finally got himself a date,” Armin teases. “Took him long enough.” I gently punch him. 

 

“Good for you, Eren! Who is the lucky man?” 

 

“Levi. You just met him yesterday?” Mikasa mentions. 

 

“Scary looking guy? Tiny?” Jean asks.

 

“Come on, he is not _that_ small…!” Armin intervenes.

 

“Easy for you to say, my little mate.” 

 

Marco turns to his boyfriend “He didn’t look scary to me…”

 

“Only because you’re so fucking golden, sweetheart! Even I don’t look scary to you. I’ll prove it to you. Look!” 

 

Jean frowns excessively, which definitely is a fearsome sight if you don’t happen to know him. And the adding effect of the car’s dashboard lights only supports this impact even more. We laugh and I spend the rest of our way thinking about tomorrow, while I try to listen to Armin and Marco talking about today’s work and Christmas.

 

\- - - 

 

“Oh, my. Where the fuck are my fucking sunglasses?” Ymir greets us as we step in. “Honestly, Eren. What’s wrong with you? Wipe that happy, dorky smirk off your face. It is too bright and gross!”

 

I just stick out my tongue at her in response and hug her, before I make my way into the flat. They have it so cosy here. It is an old building with a high ceiling, dark and comfy wooden floor and you can see Christa and Ymir in almost every detail they contributed to that: A lot of Ymir’s tacky and geeky stuff piles up on each surface, like a constantly growing collection of funko pop! vinyl figurines—some even limited collector’s editions, if I’m not corrected—, film posters decorating the walls, mixed with a few handpicked printouts of Christa’s wonderful photographs. Because of the Holidays the whole hallway is lined with fairy lights and tiny stars made of straw.

 

“He finally has a date with Levi tomorrow.” Mikasa says as she hugs Ymir too and hands her a bottle of wine and a small bag with Christmas presents. “You owe me ten bucks.”

 

“Damn it! But bless the Lord. I never thought they would actually pull through with this some day. Go, get him Eren! Your freaky smirk is still creeping me out, though. Turn it down a little bit, will you? It looks like you’re radiant.”

 

“You bet on me?”

 

“Of course, we did,” Ymir cheers. “How else were we supposed to deal with your two year cheesy staring contest, going back and forth?” 

 

“You are the worst. And you even pulled Mikasa into this? I can’t believe it!” 

 

My beloved sister doesn’t even look ashamed. She only shrugs her shoulders, winks mischievously and walks into the kitchen to say hello to Christa. 

 

“To be fair: She bet on _you_ ,” Armin cares to object. 

 

“Yeah, I know…” we both know I’m not truly mad at her. And I am on my overwhelmingly happy, rhapsodic trip anyway.

 

We follow the compelling scent of food and the sounds of cheerful laughter and chatting to catch up with the others. The small Christa is already encircled by Reiner, Berthold, Annie, Connie, Sasha, and Mikasa and looks so adorable in her ribboned red apron with small white dots, that the urge to just cuddle her in a protective embrace and never let her go is almost too strong. Her blond hair is tied in a loose pony tail and the big bowl with melted chocolate on her hip completes the lovely image.

 

“Hello guys!” Armin announces us and we shuffle over to our wonderful host to kiss her on the cheek. She is already busily talking about her trip to Australia where she has been working on a series of pictures for a report while she swirls around in the kitchen. 

 

After a while she shoos us all out into the living room to make space for the food. 

 

“You heard her,” comes from behind us. “Out! Make room for the queen or I will punch you in your ugly faces.”

 

Before Ymir can take action to her threat we obey. But one sight into the candlelit living room makes us all stop as one in the entrance. The table is sweetly decorated, branches of fir neatly draped around big flickering lanterns in the middle, accompanied by more fairy lights in glasses. The silverware is polished and white cloth napkins, wrapped in silver rings, crown the platter at each seat. More straw stars garnish the windows and the whole room looks warm and welcoming. 

 

“Wow,” Connie speaks for all of us. “She outdid herself again, huh? Are you sure she has been back for just one day?”

 

“That’s Christa for us.” Marco agrees in awe.

 

“Damn! You’re really going to keep her all for your own, aren’t you?” Reiner states.

 

“Hell yeah, I am, you big loser!” Ymir opens a bottle of champagne with a loud _“pop!”_ and deals us each a glass, her freckles dancing out of joy. “Isn’t she amazing? That woman has been doing her homey magic all day, decorating, cooking, cleaning up after my mess… And while I got tired from simply watching her, she still is full of energy. I’m such a lucky girl.” 

 

We settle around the table, still admiring Christa’s work, as she comes in herself, carrying a big pot of soup, before sitting down next to her wife at the head of the table. 

 

“Oh my god that smells so good,” Sasha squeals and already helps herself and Connie to a bowl and some bread. 

 

“Dig in. There’s still enough food in the kitchen to feed a whole company.” Christa smiles happily into a glass of red wine in her hands. “It is so good to be back and have you all here.” 

 

“The same goes for you.” Marco raises his champagne to a toast. “It’s good to have you back.”

 

“I know my own driving rule, don’t drink, icy streets, blah-blah-blah,” Ymir yells over our chatter. “But it’s Christmas. So who of you nerds wants more alcohol? And which kind?”

 

The meal, as expected, is simply delicious. The soup is followed by a beef stew in red wine sauce, buttery carrots, mashed potatoes, and pumpkin pie, and a big fat dark chocolate cake with chocolate frosting for dessert that tastes so good I want to curl up in it and die. Almost. 

 

Even Sasha seems to be at her limits in the end and Connie congratulates our hosts for finally achieving what he hasn’t seen in months, as she shoves away her plate, fondly caressing her stuffed belly with a satisfied groan. 

 

Marco and Jean are challenging each other on an eating contest over their pieces of cake which ends in both of them almost falling from their seats with laughter and Marco trying to smear the rest of Jean’s dessert into his face. 

 

Mikasa, Annie, and Armin are questioning Christa about Australia again, with Ymir listening and proudly glaring at her. I’m so happy for them to have each other back.

 

“Oh god, I am so in pain right now,” Berthold moans and rests his head on Reiner’s shoulder. 

 

“And you would eat it all again without a second thought,” he states knowingly, patting the other man’s arm with his huge hands. 

 

A moan. “True. But it looked so yummy. And it tasted so good as well. Is it bad to still want more?”

 

“No,” I laugh and refill my plate with another small piece of chocolate cake. Cocoa and sugar really are good for the nerves and I will make use of them as long as I can. I glimpse at my watch…no 20 more hours left.


	9. Chapter 9

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The other dinner.

Waiting until almost 7 pm on the next day is a real challenge for my patience. 

 

Luckily there is cleaning! Collecting a broom, my hoover, and a bucket for hot water along a sponge, wipes, and a brush, I get down with work, starting in the living room, moving over to the kitchen, then the bathroom, and finally my bedroom. I usually thrive in this routine, enjoying the ritual of wiping the surfaces, scrubbing everything until it is neat again, only stopping when the wonderful smell of omnipresent tidiness settles around me, lulling me in and making me feel comfortable again. 

 

Today it is slightly different though. My anxious heartbeat won’t come to a rest, my fantasies about what might or might not happen later this night doing their best in occupying my mind to the fullest. 

 

The familiar movements of swiping the floor doesn’t really do its trick in calming me down, the fragrance of cleansing agents hits my nose but still leaves me unsatisfied somehow, and in the end I even can’t fully appreciate the result. Damn it!

 

One quick look at the time tells me it is late noon. So much time left to fill. But I still have stuff to do to prepare everything for tonight. 

 

I fetch a small bowl and my keys, slip into a pair of shoes, and make my way downstairs to Hanji’s place. She hasn’t been over this morning again…probably giving me some space. How extraordinarily considerate. 

 

Knocking at the door after ringing the bell I prepare myself, and as she is letting me in I cannot help but flinch at the sight before me. 

 

There was a time when Hanji and I tried to live together. And though, theoretically, it had been a fabulous idea it soon became clear that in practice it just wasn’t going to work out in the long run. 

 

Hanji is a hoarder with heart and soul. And wherever she settles, she slowly but gradually starts to build a fortress of junk around her, leaving behind a battleground of trash. In the beginning it was actually working out pretty well for us: It was nice to live with a friend that felt like a sibling, taking care for each other, eating together in the evenings and enjoying the company of someone around. 

 

And at first it seemed like a perfect balance with me tidying up after her mess and she somewhat grounding me, when my sense for order became a little bit too overwhelming. But sooner or later we were driving each other mad and eventually decided on the compromise of adjacent flats, before things would eventually escalate in one of us murdering the other in pure agony. 

 

Looking at the mess greeting me in her doorstep I once again welcome this decision, but she ignores my obvious disgust and just greets me with a smug grin. 

 

“Hello neighbour. Big day today, huh?”

 

“Tch. I need your coffee machine, assumed it isn’t buried in rubbish.”

 

“You know I can not promise that. But feel free to help yourself.”

 

I step in, tiptoeing around a pile of what seems to be discarded mail and a huddle of clothes, and move into the kitchen. She closes the door behind me and follows me. 

 

“When are you going to pick him up?”

 

“Still a few hours,” I simply answer as I press the button on the machine for a double espresso. The sound of the grinder crushing the coffee beans sets in and soon the fragrance of freshly brewed coffee fills the room. 

 

Hanji practically lives of caffeine, not minding the source. Tea, coke, coffee…everything is fine for her. And even though I cringe at the thought of actually drinking this bitter black liquid, I need it today for my most favourite dessert. 

 

The way to a man’s heart is through his stomach, right?

 

“And? Are you nervous?” She ignores my warning glare. “Of course you are. It’s so obvious! You’ve got that whole clean freak smell all over you. The last time it was so bad was when your cat got sick.” As always she sticks to her guns. Why am I not surprised? 

 

“Oh, shut up!”

 

I hit the coffee button a second time, eager to leave this annoying interrogation as soon as possible.

 

“It will be fine this time. I’ve got a good feeling about this. And you know I will call on you tomorrow wanting to know every single little detail, right?” 

 

“Can’t you just stick your nose in someone else’s business from time to time? You know there are other people out there, just waiting for you to bother them and get all annoying, right?”

 

“Nope,” she smirks. “With you it is always most fun.” I answer her with a snort.

 

My coffee is done, and I gladly make my leave, not without aiming a small playful kick at her shin first.

 

“Have fun tonight!” She cheers after me with a mischievous wink. “Say hello to Eren from me. And tell me everything!”

 

Back upstairs I go to work. First I check the roasting tin with venison ragout on the stove that has been cooking there for almost a whole day now. Good things need time. I place out the bottle of Scotch whisky, the mascarpone, sugar, eggs, and homemade sponge. 

 

Pouring the scotch into the coffee always makes me smile in anticipation, and whipping up the egg whites and egg yolks separately, the scents of the ingredients clinging to the air, manages to calm my nerves for the first time today. Making tiramisu always does the trick.

 

I mix the beaten egg yolk with the mascarpone before I add the also beaten egg whites to it and start with the first layer of lady’s fingers, dipping them into the scotch flavoured coffee and lying them out in a dish. Two layers of sponge and mascarpone later I already feel a slight tipsiness going on, the familiar side effect in making this dessert. I cover the dish with cling foil and store it in the fridge before I tidy up after myself and get out the pasta dough for the main dish.

 

\- - - 

 

A few hours later I step out into the cold, admitting to myself that cooking for tonight instead of taking him out to a restaurant was the best idea I could have had. It had kept me busy since yesterday, and all afternoon today, shortening the hours of waiting, repressing the frustration because even after all the time of yearning for him from a safe distance I couldn’t even seem to be able to properly wait one fucking day now without going nuts.

 

I shove my gloved hands into the pockets of my coat, moving trough the snow and burying my face into my scarf. White Christmas. What a damn cliché! Tonight I don’t seem to mind that thought. It looks nice. Peaceful. And the fairy lights all around in the trees and windows, accompanied by the candles glistening through drapes add to this atmosphere.

 

Not a lot of people pass my way. It is Christmas Eve, in Germany the first day of Christmas with presents in the evening and having the family over for dinner. I hope Eren doesn’t mind spending this time with me instead of Mikasa and Armin. They might be from England too, yet adapting to traditions appears to be something they would be open to do. But I didn’t want to delay this until after Christmas. It had been hard enough to skip last night.

 

Of course my heart has to betray me as soon as I spot him, already waiting for me in front of their shop. It jumps in my chest to nestle up in my throat, making my hands sweat, and breathing come shorter. Pathetic excitement almost threatens to overwhelm me, something that happens way too often for my taste lately. 

 

This man really isn’t good for my piece of mind. Fortunately the chill air cools me down a bit.

 

As I come closer I can’t shake the feeling that he doesn’t quite have his shit together as well. His eyes flicker around and he seems to be jumpy, bouncing on his toes and his hands fumbling in the pockets of his coat. Maybe I am not the only one on the edge here. 

 

My lips curl up a bit in relief at that thought. “Hi!” I raise my hand and wave at him cheerily. 

 

_Stupid old man. Stay cool! Don’t look too desperate._

 

Eren freezes before he loosens up again only a second later, a wide grin appearing on his face and his cheekbones flushing lightly in a cute shade of pink that reaches all the way up to his ears as he approaches me. Okay. I can do this! 

 

“Hi,” he answers, smiling so much now that it would make the Cheshire cat proud.

 

Before the situation can become any sort of awkward with me not knowing at all what to do or say now—because _fuck_ he looks good in this black cloak with snow flakes resting on his ruffled hair under his cap, eyes beaming at me and all in all just too tantalising to endure—I turn around and gesture him with my head to follow me. 

 

“So. Where are we going?” His bright, smooth voice plucks at my nerves in a way that I can not describe even if I wanted to, and even though I know it is cold as fuck out here, I feel hot. Very hot.

 

“You’ll see,” I look at his curious expression and can’t help but laugh. “Patience, young padavan! It isn’t far.”

 

One of the things that fascinate me so much about Eren is how easily one can tell his thoughts just by observing him. His mind clearly is on fire right now, questioning himself where I might be going to lead him to. I also spot excitement and a hint of restlessness. 

 

I let him have his thoughts on our way to my flat and even if my brain is screaming at me that this is honestly happening—today, _now!—_ an almost secure calm overcomes me. It feels right. Just like that.

 

As we come to a halt in front of my building he looks up, emerging from his thoughts. “Is this your place?” he asks.

 

“What does it look like? Santa’s playground?” I answer with a crooked smile and get out my keys to let us in.

 

We climb up the stairs and I am sure to hear some hasty shuffling, then a thumping sound as if someone just tripped, and a muffled female curse when we pass Hanji’s door of flat. Eren stops, a worried and irritated look appearing on his face. 

 

I sigh, turn around to knock at the door and yell “That’s what you get from eavesdropping, Hanji. Mind your own fucking business.” 

 

A quiet “shit!” carries through the walls, followed by a hysterical giggle and I roll my eyes, continuing our way up. 

 

“That’s what you get for having a friend. Sorry for that.”

 

“Will she be ok?”

 

“Bad weeds grow tall. But yes. And I will check on her.” 

 

“I didn’t know you were neighbours.” 

 

“Yes, we have been for a while now,” I answer as I open the door to my flat. “It is better this way, being able to watch out for another.” 

 

He gives an understanding nod and steps in, shooting curious glances around in the hallway. 

 

“You can hang your coat here,” I point to the wardrobe, and am happily relieved when he first steps out of his shoes to place them neatly on the rack. 

 

I take off my shoes too, remove my coat, and as I turn around I am awestruck for a second. Eren wears a suit. Not a bourgeois one that makes him look formal, but a casual black one without a tie and with a white button-up shirt under the jacket that fits him perfectly. The urge to just jump at him to rip it all off right here and now is almost overpowering and he must have noticed my gape. 

 

“I didn’t know you would invite me to your place. And you told me to wear something nice, so…” He shrugs his shoulders and almost looks bashful as he raises an arm to rub his neck. My mind goes into overdrive and argues with itself, on the one hand applauding me for texting him to do so and on the other hand cursing me for it all the same. Damn, he really nailed it! 

 

“It looks good,” I finally manage to answer, glad that my voice doesn’t give up in the middle of the sentence, and move again to lead him further into my place. I show him the kitchen and the living room where we are greeted by Lizzy who eagerly nudges at me before examining our guest. 

 

Eren smiles fondly at her and kneels down. “Hello there, beautiful.” 

 

“I hope you aren’t allergic?” I ask, fondling my cat’s back and making her purr. “She isn’t afraid of strangers, but if you mind her strolling around I can–” 

 

“No, not at all. It’s totally fine. I love cats!” He holds out his hand so she can sniff his scent, a doting gaze spreading over his face. I almost feel a bit jealous. “You said, she is a girl? What’s her name?”

 

“Miss Elizabeth Bennet. Lizzy, that’s Eren. He will be our guest tonight, so behave, will you?”

 

“Hi Lizzy! So nice to meet you. Where’s your mister Darcy?” Eren teases. 

 

“He died last year.” 

 

“Oh, shit. That was supposed to be a joke,” he stutters, blushing again and obviously feeling uncomfortable. “I’m so sorry!”

 

I shake my head to calm him. “Don’t be. He was old and got awfully sick. It honestly was hard for us at first, but we are fine now. Aren’t we Lizzy?”

 

She weasels around Eren’s legs now, poking him from time to time to mark him with her scent while he starts to pat her head with a delighted smile. 

 

Okay. I definitely am jealous now!

 

“I know you had a probably fancy dinner yesterday and with Christmas right ahead I thought going out to eat at an exclusive restaurant might not be the best idea. You don’t mind eating here, do you?”

 

“That actually sounds great!” He stands up again to follow me into the kitchen. “Can I help with anything?”

 

“No, thanks, it is already taken care of. But if you want to you can set out the glasses on the table. Would you like to drink something?”

 

“Yes, please. What do you have?”

 

“Red wine?”

 

“Perfect!” He grins and I hand him two glasses. Our fingers touch for a short moment, sending sparks through my veins. I quickly turn around to fetch a bottle and open it with a corkscrew before carrying it into the living room. I heroically fail in trying not to stare at his arse. 

 

“Please already take a seat, dinner is coming right up,” I say, pouring in the wine before going back into the kitchen to check after the lasagna that has been cooking in the oven. 

 

“Thanks. It smells good by the way.”

 

The lasagna is ready to serve and I pull over some mittens to get it out and carry it into the living room. 

 

“Thank you.” I reply gladly. “I hope you like venison?”  


 

His eyes lighten up as he sees the casserole and he nods enthusiastically. 

 

“Definitely. Wow! It looks great too.”

 

“Let’s hope it tastes well.” I grin back and start cutting us each a piece. 

 

“I’m sure it will. Thank you for having me over.”

 

“You’re welcome.”

 

He eagerly examines his plate and starts digging in. The look he gives me after his first bite is priceless: Shock, delight and admiration are shooting at me and I have to admit I feel kind of smug. 

 

“Is it good, yes?”

 

“It is fantastic! You made this yourself?”

 

“Yes, I did.”

 

“Wow!”

 

“It’s nothing!” I shrug. 

 

He sees my proud smile that I cannot hide any longer and laughs.  “You like to cook?”

 

“I do. You?”

 

“Yeah, but I’m not that good. Much better at eating, I guess.”

 

“I doubt that.” I help myself to a sip of wine and start eating myself. He’s right: It is good. Making the pasta layers from scratch has truly paid off. 

 

“Believe me. This, however, is freaking amazing. What did you put in here anyway?”

 

“Just some home made pasta, venison ragout with wine that simmered over night, bay leaf infused béchamel sauce, and good old English cheddar.” He pauses in his movements at my words. His tousled hair beautifully frames his face and I want to reach out and touch it. Grab him… 

 

“Nothing much, huh?” His eyes sparkle in fascinating shades of green, blue, and turquoise and I just gaze back at him. He breaks eye contact first, shaking his head with a chuckle, and turning back to his portion, emptying it with pure delight on his face.

 

Home cooked dinner was such a right choice! 

 

“Seconds?” I ask a few minutes later as he glances from his emptied plate to the casserole.

 

“Absolutely! Thanks.”

 

“So how was your evening with Christa and Ymir yesterday? As much as I heard, you must have been quite a crowd.”

 

“Yes. Christa got back from a photo assignment in Australia after a couple of weeks away and invited us over. They also know some friends of ours and it was so wonderful to meet up with everybody.”

 

We eat and talk. It is thrilling to get to know him better, seeing a more private, personal, side of him than one gets to know in the shop. 

 

Soon we are done with eating, and I get up from my chair to clean up the dishes and store the leftovers into the fridge. I put the plates and cutlery in the dish washer and move over to the sink to soak the empty casserole before the remains of the crust will be a pain to scrub away. 

 

I am relieved that I've managed to resist him somehow until now, considering how sexy he looks eating, cutting the food with his slender hands, gently chewing on the bites before swallowing and shooting lingering glances at me from time to time. We are alone here, not another soul around. He is so close. Just a few meters away. Sitting at the table, enjoying my cooking… it is almost too much. 

 

I want to kiss him so badly by now it almost hurts and I find it hard to breathe, the urgent wish having built itself from the second I saw him today and just growing stronger with every minute. 

 

Should I make a move? God knows I want to. But I know it wouldn’t end in only kissing him. My stomach says, no screams, I want more. Much more! I need it so badly. Would he be okay with that? He wouldn’t be here if he wasn’t though in the first place, would he? And still there is this fear in me to fuck it all up. Like I always did in the past, and ruin the only chance at happiness I might have with him. 

 

But it has been so long since my last date. And as awful as it was, being alone is something I don’t want to endure any less longer than I need to. I want to feel his warmth, hear his voice and get lost in his touch. My fingers finally want to run through his soft looking hair, grip on to it while the rest of my body wants to press against his, thrust into his. 

 

And he still is here. In my living room. I swallow hard. Maybe I should just–

 

I’m so lost in my inner battle that I do not hear him coming. Suddenly he stands behind me. Close. Too close. He leans over, his hands resting on the kitchen counter in front of us, his arms framing me and his warm front pressing slowly against my back. My heart at once starts to hammer in my chest, flooding my groin with hot blood that gives me a painful hard-on in less then a second.

 

“Thanks for the food,” he whispers into my ear. “It was lovely, Levi.” 

 

I cringe at the low and dark ring in his voice, feeling electricity shooting down my spine caused by his breath that strokes my ear. 

 

Hearing my name this way, his body gently grinding against mine, his compelling scent washing over me, and his lips tenderly brushing my neck now, sending shivers all over me is too much. And my mind just snaps. 

 

I turn around to look him in the eyes, my hands wet with soapy water, my gaze piercing his, searching for approval and finding it instantly, openly showing on his face. 

 

He lowers his head towards mine, his eyes fluttering shut, his tongue wetting his lips and I finally give in to what I wanted to do the whole evening and much longer before. I let myself go. 


	10. Chapter 10

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The things you do after two years of just dreaming.

Levi doesn’t just kiss me. He attacks me. His soap water dripping fists grab my shirt a split second before I feel his lips crushing against mine. I am so overwhelmed by his uncontrolled and frank passion that a moan escapes my throat. Needy. Begging for more. 

 

It feels too good to be true.

 

And before I can catch another thought I am being pushed backwards until my spine is smashing against a hard surface. The fridge? I feel his tongue on my lips, demanding entrance, and I gladly let him in. This feels so _fucking good_. So _right_. 

 

He slips into my mouth, his small tongue pointy, hot, and wet and I feel my whole body melt against his in pure pleasure as I answer his kiss. Tasting him, finally feeling him, breathing in his scent that reminds me of soap, clean, home and _man_ makes my head spin. Another groan is building in my chest, vibrating through both of our mouths. 

 

I still want more. Need more. Now it is me who is pushing him, without breaking our kiss, trying to move away from the fridge, making space for my arms to strip him from his unnecessarily covering black sweater that has been disturbing me all evening. It has to go away. I need to see him. Feel him. Touch him. I need it so bad. 

 

God, I want him so fucking bad! 

 

He is breaking away for a second as his jumper goes over his head. His eyes are piercing mine, promising me no mercy, and just before I can shudder in delight at this, his mouth is back on mine, turned up in a smile and his teeth are eagerly nibbling, biting at my lips. His hands are on my back now, stroking it and making their way up into my hair, massaging my neck, securing my head from bursting out of utter bliss while his mouth keeps on harassing me. 

 

Two years of controlled emotions bubble up inside of me, finally being allowed to surface and I realise that I am about to cry out of relief and answered feelings. I know sex is not love. It doesn’t mean forever. But it is enough for now. And I thrive in it. I close my eyes again and let the all of him wash over me _,_ drinking it in, enjoying his strong decisive movements that are pushing me back again. Blood rushes through my veins, sending a prickling sensation through them.

 

His hands suddenly loosen their grip on my head but before I can fully comprehend that loss he is tugging at my jacket. I shrug it off somehow while he already is ripping my shirt open, pulling it out of my pants. He hisses as his fingers come to rest on my naked chest, causing goosebumps emerge all over it and my arms at his firm touch. 

 

I squeal shortly in surprise as the back of my knees hit a soft edge that must belong to his couch… How did he turn me around and manoeuvre me all this way through his living room without me even realising it? I don’t care. I let myself fall back, almost squashing his cat in this process, that complains with a load _miaow!_ and jumps away to make us space. 

 

“Sorry Lizzy,” Levi mumbles distractedly between his now heavy breaths and climbs over me to sit on my lap. He interrupts our kiss, letting our lungs fill up again, and cups the back of my head with his hands. His thumbs gently brush over my cheeks that feel so hot that I am sure they must show an embarrassing blush. 

 

“Wanted…to do this…for so long,” he pants, making my heart skip a beat. 

 

“Yeah! Me too,” I breathe back at him, my chest rising and falling heavily and my hands trailing the muscles on his back and his waist. 

 

Wow, he really has abs! But the pure wish to simply caress him is more pressing right now.

 

His grey eyes are fixing my gaze so hard that I feel them burn their way right into my soul. He looks almost vulnerable this way. A lump forms in my throat and I move to kiss him again. Tenderly this time, more cautious and more thoroughly, exploring him and letting him do the same. We take our time. Just for now. Slowing down a bit, just savouring the moment. _Our_ moment. 

 

He pulls away again, our foreheads touching and we continue looking at each other. 

 

“Bed?” I ask quietly, not able to hide the longing in my question. 

 

“Most definitely.”

 

He stands up, hops from the couch, takes my hand, and guides us to the next room. His bed is big, double-sized, and has dark grey covers. It looks and even _smells_ completely clean, as the rest of his flat does. I have to grin at the thought that this applies to himself, as well. As I know now.

 

He presses me down onto the bed, moving on top of me and holding me with his gaze again, before continuing to kiss me fiercely. And I need it. I don’t want it to be gentle right now, I need to feel his strength, his want. And I kiss him back, stroking my tongue against his provocatively, moaning when he tenderly bites on my lips and screaming of pleasure when he suddenly grinds his loins against my already very hard length, both of us still wearing our pants. He does it again and my head falls back. 

 

“Levi. Please…!” 

 

He simply nods and continues undressing first me, then himself, before lunging back onto me, pressing our cocks together and kissing me. 

 

Feeling him is mind-blowing.

 

The bedroom is filled with muffled sounds, our pantings, and my begging. I need him. I can’t hardly stand it and try to show it to him by grasping his arse while moving my hips upwards. My tip is already wet and slides slippery along his and now it is his time to groan. But he understands, letting go of my mouth and slightly kissing his way down my body. 

 

My head swirls. I feel his lips on my jaw, on my neck and want to melt into a puddle of bliss. I feel them on my collarbones, on my chest, and suddenly his teeth are teasing my nipple. My back arches upwards and I look down at him in disbelief, catching his leer as he looks back at me with these grey eyes. I still can’t believe they are so close now. 

 

“Is this good, yes?”

 

I don’t have any words left and he knows anyway. He hums approvingly and returns to my nipple, flicking it with his tongue, biting it slightly and then licking it again.

 

The only thing I can do is moan hoarsely and do my best not to touch my cock because the urge is almost unbearable. But I don’t want to come already. This is too good. 

 

I try to flip him over, want to take over control, make a mess out of him as well but he grips my hands at my attempt and pins them down at my sides. 

 

“Levi… I…”

 

“Yes?” His eyes dance wickedly, his mouth attending to my other nipple to torture it as well while not breaking eye contact. Damn this sly bastard! He knows I’m close already. So close… Oh, what the hell. Fuck pride!

 

“Please, Levi,” I moan, looking strait at him, trying to put all of my feelings into that gaze, slightly moving my fingers to link them with his. Desperation. Happiness. Joy. Want. Need. Greed… I try to put it all into my expression and whimper. “Fuck me. Now!”

 

It’s like I found a switch. His teasing grin transforms into a shaking groan, his eyes going all black and dark and it turns me on even more. 

 

“Shit, Levi…now!”

 

This finally makes him hurry. He jerks up with a hiss, lets go of my hands and lungs for one of the nightstands, framing the head of bis bed, and returns with a box of condoms and lube. 

 

He kisses me fiercely, only for a short second, pressing his whole, hard body against mine and immediately breaks it off again. 

 

His hands are nervously fumbling at the box of condoms, desperately trying to open first the box itself and then one of the small packages. 

 

I find it endearing and my heart almost hurts at his feverous attempt to get what he wants. What we want. I lift my arms to let my fingers run trough his pitch black hair. It is so fascinatingly soft and he shortly nuzzles his head in my hands as he finally frees one of the condoms. 

 

Hell will freeze over if I won’t touch him first and I grab for it to roll it up his dick, stroking him softly, before he can have a chance. 

 

“Eren…” he pants now and I bite down on my lips. They feel swollen from all the heavy kissing before, but oh so good, and I observe his reactions as my fingers move down even further to touch his balls. 

 

“Oh god…!” his voice calls out, as he shuts his eyes and I grin. 

 

“I think ‘Eren’ is quite enough for me.”

 

His eyes snap open at once, glaring at me in amused disbelief and I know whatever he is about to do to make me pay for this comment: This look right now is definitely worth it. 

 

But he only retrieves with a smirk and now he is kneeling down between my legs. I hear the cup of the lube bottle open and close again and then his slender fingers gently touch my cock for the first time, slowly moving their ways down to finally press at my hole. A deep moan erupts from my mouth, uncontrollable. 

 

“Oh fuck. Levi…”

 

“Stop making these sounds, Eren! Or this will be over before it begins.” His voice is struggling now and I honestly try but as his first finger enters me another scream escapes me. 

 

He shoots a warning look at me, trembling now, and I shut my mouth with my hand. 

 

He’s adding a second digit to the first now, moving them around, loosening me. Preparing me. My heart is beating so loudly in my ears by now, I can hardly hear anything else. I move my hips again, showing him to finally replace his fingers, and he gets the hint.

 

His fingers are leaving me empty and I want to whine but I already feel him slowly pressing into me. It hurts. But it is everything I need right now and he moves so carefully that soon all I can feel is pleasure. 

 

He is all the way in now, his balls pressing against my arse, his hands moving to my hips to hold me in place. The look he gives me is questioning and I want to drown in it. I move in response and he pulls himself out to thrust into me. 

 

“Ahh…!” I really can’t hold back anymore and this breaks his last piece of self control too. 

 

“Eren. Fuck!” The thrusts harder now, faster, changing his angle from push to push, trying to find the right position. 

 

Our eyes lock at each others gaze, soaking up every change, every feeling, and as he hits my prostate I come with a yell, sputtering a hot and sticky mess all over both of us, making him follow immediately with a shuddering sigh. 

 

He thrusts a few more times, gradually pacing down, while our heavy breaths fill his room. I love this sound already. 

 

“Well, this was long overdue,” he smirks at me and I giggle back, my chest still rising and falling heavily. 

 

“Give me a few minutes, old man, and I am ready for a second round.”

 

“Needy baby, greedy baby.”

 

“Is that a bad thing? I didn’t hear you complain earlier…”

 

He just pinches my thigh in response and moves out of me. “What about cleaning ourselves up and having dessert first. We still didn’t end dinner, you know?”

 

“There’s dessert?”

 

“Thought you might be interested in that. Come on, brat! Bath time.”

 

He helps me getting up from his bed, my legs are a bit weak, but I manage to stagger into his bathroom. Levi hands me a damp towel and we wash ourselves, both still grinning like dumb, stupid teenagers on crack. 

 

“I have some clothes that might fit you if you want to change into something more comfortable. Sweatpants?”

 

“Yes, please.” We put on some clothes, me just slipping into my boxers, a comfy pair of pants he digs out of his closet, and my shirt, just closing a few buttons sporadically. He also changes into a pair of comfy pants and a wide, black t-shirt that hangs loosely around his shoulders. 

 

Back in the kitchen he opens the fridge, getting out a huge dish with white stuff in it. I shuffle behind him, curious, and as he fetches some cocoa powder to sprinkle it onto the foamy looking dessert it suddenly dawns to me. 

 

“You made tiramisu? Oh my god. Please tell me you did!” 

 

“Didn’t we just come to an agreement to let that whole ‘god’ thingy just go away?” 

 

I slap his arse in revenge and he smears some cocoa powder over my nose. “Yes, I guess, we did.”

 

We move back to the living room, me carrying a couple of plates and forks, Levi taking care of the dessert, and as we sit down at the table again, our legs reach out to interweave at once. 

 

Why does this feel so familiar? It is nice. 

 

Turns out you don’t really need plates for eating tiramisu. It is fabulous as it is just with gripping a fork and digging right into that creamy, sinful stuff. And that’s what we end up doing: Giggling, feeding each other with layers of mascarpone and soaked sponge, right out of the dish. It is delicious as hell and as I tell him that the grins happily and just reaches out for another big bite to shove it into my mouth. 

 

“Would you like to stay over tonight?” he wants to know as we are finished, and he takes my hand, almost shyly caressing it with his fingers. 

 

I look at him, sigh theatrically, and bit down a smile. As his eyes turn worried I finally give in and answer. “And I thought you would never ask.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Tiramisu for two very generous portions:  
> 250 g mascarpone  
> 2 egg whites  
> 1 pinch of salt  
> 2 egg yolks  
> 2 tbs sugar  
> 12-18 lady’s fingers (depending on the size of your dish)  
> 50-60 ml freshly brewed espresso  
> 50-60 ml scotch  
> some cocoa powder
> 
> Whip up the egg whites with the salt until very stiff. In a second bowl beat the egg yolks with the sugar until the egg yolks become foamy, light yellow and almost stiff, too. Add the mascarpone to the egg yolks and keep on beating until it is smooth. Gently fold in the egg whites now, I like to do it in thirds so it stays nice and foamy. 
> 
> Mix the espresso with the scotch and quickly dip in the lady fingers in before laying them out in your dish. After one layer of sponge distribute half of the mascarpone mix onto that and repeat the whole process. Cover the dish with cling film and let it rest in the fridge for at least 6 hours or over night. 
> 
> Sprinkle some cocoa powder over it before serving. Eat and be merry!


	11. Chapter 11

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Waking up on Christmas Day.

Waking up feels strange somehow. It is unfamiliarly warm, my whole body wants to go right back to sleep out of pure, weird exhaustion, and something is tickling my neck. 

 

Lizzy,I guess. But that is kind of odd, because she usually likes to snuggle into the curve of my belly during the night while I sleep. And Lizzy’s warmth is different. More concentrated. And fuzzy… I open my eyes. 

 

Yes, there she lies. Nestled next to my chest and snoring cutely. A hand is resting on her back, slowly crawling her black, fluffy fur. A slender hand with beautiful, caring fingers, ending in slim, long arms. Not mine. 

 

What the– oh! 

 

Reality hits me and my heart gives a small kick while the events of last night flash back at me. 

 

Eren! Eren in his coat on the street, eagerly waiting for me to pick him up. Eren sitting at my table and praising my food with a mischievous, almost knowing, grin—the meal I had been preparing in impatient anticipation. Eren laughing, smiling at me. Eren in his gorgeous suit, that just begs to be ripped off. Eren suddenly close to me, so close, and initiating our first kiss, sweetly asking me for permission without pushing me, swiping away all of my stupid worries. Eren screaming my name in this overpowering manor, out of utter bliss, over and over again, begging me to…

 

Last night really did happen, I guess. My limbs feel weak, too. It’s a good kind of weak. A happy kind. An amazingly calming thought.

 

I must have made some sort of noise or movement. 

 

“Good morning,” a bright, but all the same low, quiet and gentle voice whispers behind me. My most favourite voice. “I hope, I didn’t wake you.” 

 

“Mm. Don’t worry.”

 

Silence settles around us. A comfortable silence, and I cherish it. I want to remember this forever.

 

“I never thought I would get a Levi sandwich one day,” he suddenly chuckles, irritating me. It’s too early.

 

“Huh?”

 

“Well, you lie between me and your cat, so…”

 

“Oh, I get it. Sandwich. Very funny. Haha!” But my own voice is betraying me already, ending in a laugh, and he snuggles even closer now, sliding one of his legs between mine, and gently kissing the nape of my neck. 

 

It is such a loving gesture that I want to sigh, but his lips keep on brushing my neck, my shoulders, and my ear, and I suddenly struggle to suppress a pleasant shiver. 

 

“It’s so cosy,” Eren mumbles finally, and his words tighten my chest. Why does he have to be this perfect? What did I do to deserve this happiness? But maybe it is all just a trick and he will be leaving any moment. Or it is a dream and I will wake up any second now…

 

He doesn’t leave though. And I don’t wake up either. What do people say, when they are simply happy?

 

“Mhh.” I answer, taking his hand away from Lizzy’s back, intertwining his fingers with mine ,and resting our hands in front of my chest. Just because it feels good and I need it. Not because I might be jealous of my own cat again. No!

 

Okay…, maybe a little bit. But still. It feels so nice this way. Comforting. Just lying close to each other, enjoying the moment. 

 

Why the hell did I wait so long with that? I could have had this months ago already. Years perhaps even, filled with mornings waking up next to each other. Embracing like this… I squeeze his fingers.

 

“Hm?” his questioning hum vibrates through my back.

 

“Do you need breakfast?” I ask, suddenly aware of the fact that he might be hungry. 

 

“Mhh… No, not really. But some tea would be splendid.”

 

“Well, as you might know, I’ve got some yummy Darjeeling here, as well as some Assam, and matcha, and some very good sencha, too. I’ve got quite a good dealer, you see?” I shuffle a little to roll onto my back and I am able to look at him now. His bright, now deep turquoise, eyes are wide open, looking at me in this wonderful way. And then I see his hair. 

 

Usually it is cutely tousled and frames his face in an astonishing, adorable mess. Right now, just after waking up, it stands up in a most peculiar way that looks like…pure sex. Very good sex. It reminds me of whispered secrets. Moaned wishes. And rumpled bed sheets. It’s hot as fuck!

 

I did that. Well, and his sleeping, I guess. But I was part of that, too. 

 

It looks so tempting that I just have to touch it. And I do, running my fingers through it, gently massaging his scalp. 

 

“Hi” he grins at me. His eyes beaming, casting their spell on me.

 

“Hi.” 

 

I swallow. My lips are suddenly tingling, wanting to melt with his again. And as I see it, they are still a little bit swollen from last night. Shit, that’s sexy!

 

“Your cat snores.” Why does his voice have to be this arousing? Or maybe it’s his accent? “It sounds so cute I want to die. Is she always like that?” Both, I guess.

 

“Doesn’t it? And yes, she is. You should have met her, when she was young. Stole my heart right on first sight, that dinky little minx.” Well, not just her… I keep on studying his face.

 

“Not hard to believe that…” he watches her fondly now, my fingers still caressing his hair, and my old, scarred heart melts as his eyes meet mine again. 

 

I want to take everything in. His sleepy look, his bed hair, his wonderful smell that is all ‘Eren’, his sound… and even though it is more than I ever really dared to hope for, it is not enough.

 

My hand tightens its grip on his head, pulling him closer to me and I kiss him. 

 

He gasps into my mouth and I love it. He kicks away the sheets on the bed and moves to crouch over me, cupping my head with his hands now while resting on his arms, kissing me back. I feel pure lust in his kiss as his tongue touches mine in a provocative, slow stroke that sets me on fire from head to toes.

 

“Ready for round three, grandpa?” he smirks as he breaks away, grinding his amazingly hard morning wood against mine in a slow, almost torturing movement. Fuck, this is hot! How could I ever dare to resist him this long? I’m so fucking stupid…

 

“I will never forgive myself for revealing to you how old I actually am,” I answer him with a dark glare but it doesn’t seem to terrorise him at all. Damn it! He’s looking through me already.

 

He leans back down. Slowly. Teasing. And as our lips meet again we are instantly falling into an almost desperate rhythm. His tongue is caressing mine, licking it, asking for more, taunting me. Almost daring me.

 

My whole chest feels like it is filled with glitter right now. Sparkling. And all on its way to explode in a big mess. It isn’t fair. How does he do that? Last night wasn’t even close to ‘enough’ to calm my urgent need for him, and my whole body hurts out of want for this man.

 

A knock on the door. No, no, no, no, no! No way. Not now. Please! Go away and let me be. Just this once…

 

Eren interrupts our kiss, obviously startled. 

 

A second knock (how extraordinarily considerate; she usually only knocks once), followed by the sound of keys turning in the lock. Crap!

 

I grind my teeth and look up at him.

 

“Shit. It’s Hanji! Whatever is going to happen now,” I beg, “I want to apologise for her in advance. You know her. She has no social boundaries. At all. And she loves to dig her nose into my priva–” 

 

“Merry Christmas, mister love machine!” we hear a cheerful yell, coming from the entrance. Lizzy is jumping off the bed, already on her way to greet Hanji after first stretching her whole body in her usual morning salute. 

 

“How was your big date? Did it go well? Did you finally get to shag that cute boy? Uh…” her voice becomes all sweet now. “Hello my cute little Miss Stinky Toes! Merry Christmas, beautiful girl!”

 

I only have the emotional strength to reach for the closest pillow and push it onto my face, hitting it once, twice, with my fist, before throwing it away again with a shake of my head. 

 

I can not escape this. I know it. I have experienced it. It will go on forever and it will be like hell. At least my boner is gone now.

 

“Oh god. This is so embarrassing…” I moan.

 

Eren has already moved away from me, obviously with a lot of reluctance by the look of his eyes that still glare at me, and I force myself to stand up as well. I search for my shirt and sweatpants—they somehow got thrown away last night, all across the room—and I have just managed to put them on, as we hear a knock on the frame of the bedroom door. 

 

“Rise and shine cute, little elves! Christmas is upon us! And don’t pretend to not be in there, Levi. I know, you are. He still has his coat on the hanger in the hallway and his shoes so neatly next to yours…” 

 

“Fuck you, shitty glasses. Leave us alone!” I shout, Eren giggling behind me while searching for his own pieces of clothing as well. I hate to not have time to appreciate how good he looks half naked when the sunlight hits his smooth skin in this warm glowing light. I almost find myself drooling.

 

“You know I won’t leave before I can humiliate you to full extent. Now come out here, so I can hug, congratulate, and embarrass you all at once!”

 

I sigh and look at Eren with an apology. “Do you think, you are ready for this?”

 

He steps in front of me, smelling so warm, and good, and sleepy and real. I just want to grab him again to throw him back on the bed. But he just reaches for my hand and simply says “ready when you are.”

 

We begin my dreaded walk to the door. 

 

\- - - 

 

“Hello Eren! So nice to see you.” Hanji smirks as she sees us. This woman really is the devil in disguise. 

 

“Good morning, Hanji.” How can he stay so polite? I want to punch her. 

 

Eren lets go of my hand, but not before squeezing it shorty, and makes his way into the kitchen, so I can deal with my poor excuse of a friend. 

 

“Hanji.”

 

“Levi?”

 

“What are you doing here, sniffing around? Why couldn’t you have just tripped over some more rubbish last night and suffocate on it? It would have been such a gift for all of us.”

 

She just grins. Of course. She knows me too well. 

 

I sigh. “Want to scrounge some tea, while you’re here already?”

 

“Oh, yes! How sweet of you. You’re such a good friend!”

 

I walk into my kitchen, where Eren already pours liquid out of my water filter into a pot on the stove. I slide behind him to embrace him, bury my face between his shoulder blades with a sigh and plant a kiss on his neck behind his ear. He shudders shortly and I see delicious, sweet goosebumps rising on his skin. 

 

Uh, look what I’ve found! 

 

“What kind of tea would you like?” I ask him.

 

“Is matcha okay?”  


 

“Of course. Should I make it strong? You might need it with her being here…” 

 

We turn around and are faced with two big, happily beaming eyes behind a huge pair of glasses. It’s like meeting a messier version of a staring Meryl Streep in ‘Lemony Snicket’s A Series Of Unfortunate Events’. Only even more crazy. Because she is fucking _real_ and gloating at us in my kitchen.

 

“Don’t let me interrupt you, you two lovebirds. I’m just here to pry,” she chirps.

 

“Yes, please. Make it strong!” Eren begs me.

 

I laugh, kiss his neck again, and start to collect my tea supplies. Hanji will want a black tea so I fill a small pot with Darjeeling leaves for her, placing it next to the stove, and rummage for the matcha powder in the fridge. It turns bad so quickly, that I got used to storing it there, wrapped closed tightly and packed into a tin box to shield it form light and other outside influences.

 

I also fetch my matcha cup—a black clay bowl with a high and straight rim with a bright blue overglaze—my chasen and the chashaku (bamboo whisk and bamboo spoon), and a second drinking bowl for myself. I fill each bowl with two very generously heaped spoons of matcha powder from the chashaku, add a small amount of filtered water, and use the chasen to mix it. I like doing this and I feel comforted somehow by this routine and the calming scratching sound of the wood bristles on the pottery. But not for too long. Hanji is still Hanji. And she is still here…

 

“How was the sex last night? Who was on top? Was it good?”

 

I want to kill her. So badly. And I tell her with my glare. 

 

“Oh, it was _that nice_ , huh?” She leers at me. “Good for you! I hope, you liked it too, Eren. He can be so unemotional sometimes.” 

 

How dare she!? 

 

“Do you really want to know?” Eren asks now. His voice sounds curious and reserved at the same time. And I feel uncertain all of a sudden. Did he not like it? Did I do something wrong? He apparently still can walk without breaking down, what is good after us doing it twice in a row last night, only interrupted by our tiramisu feast, but–

 

“Yes, please tell me. Pretty-please!”

 

“What the bloody hell, Hanji!” I put away the bamboo brush and want to shake my head at her with a threat, maybe even strangle her a bit, but I get interrupted. Eren is standing behind me all of a sudden, and turns me around to kiss me passionately. 

 

His tongue is forcing its way into my mouth, his hips are pressing against mine in small but decisive waves and his one hand is caressing my neck, while the other is supporting my back. And I desperately need that right now, because I feel my knees are about to give in. 

 

I blame it on the shock and the morning clumsiness.

 

My hands involuntarily snap forward to fist the sides of his shirt, embracing him back. My whole body arches against his and all I can perceive right now is him. His touch, his scent, his sounds. I want it all. It feels so much like home, it is almost unreal.

 

I can’t think any more and I sense my hands are crawling up his back to nestle in his hair, pulling him closer, wanting to conquer him again out of pure selfishness. He gasps into my throat and I feel it in every nerve. It is shooting down my spine and I am already pushing him backwards again. Hungry. Needy…

 

A loud snore interrupts us, leaving both him and me breathless and greedy for more. “Come on, you two. Get a room!” 

 

I stare at him, hoping he gets the promise in my eyes. _Later!_ I will so make him pay for making my legs wobbly in front of Hanji.

 

He nods at me with a wicked glare and I turn around. 

 

“You manipulative bitch. Happy now?”

 

“Very! You two are so adorable.”

 

Her eyes seem to be a little watery and we both desperately have to look away now, because this is a hazard zone for us. Happy tears would be the worst thing to happen right now. 

 

Luckily the water is boiling already, interrupting the dangerous moment, and I remove the pot from the stove to first brew Hanji’s Darjeeling and then the matcha for Eren and me. I cover the dark green liquid with more water and use the chasen to stir it up quickly, until the surface gets all light green and bubbly and a wonderful smell hits my nose. The smell of promising clarity and comfort that only matcha can provide. With coffee and even black tea it is always like ‘Boom! Your mind wants to be awake now! Even if your body doesn’t.’ With matcha it is just a feeling of instantly but happily slipping into awareness, clearness and fitness at the same time. I love it. 

 

I hand Eren my matcha bowl before I tend to my own portion, still wanting to be beaten in my breakfast bowl. It doesn’t get as bubbly and nice this time since the bottom of my bowl is too curvy, but it will do for now. The sweet bright green foam is just more like an extra to this delicious treat anyway. 

 

“So, Hanji. Was brings you here? Disregarding your constant need to immorally spy on your neighbours, I mean.”

 

“Christmas, of course.” She grins. “Here. My gift to you. You’re welcome, you grinch!”

 

Before I know it she throws a box at me and I catch it in reflex. I turn to the sink in my kitchen and the cleaning supplies under it, to fetch her gift as well, and throw it back at her. 

 

“Dankeschön!” she cheers and rips it open. 

 

I open my gift too and have a big box of condoms in my hands. Another sigh escapes me. “ Very considerate, Hanji. Thanks!”

 

“I thought you might need it.” She winks at Eren now, who blushes all the way up to his ears. “Have fun, you two!”

 

“Please enlighten me once again: Why do I care to get you a proper gift every year?” I ask her. “You always manage to make a total fool of myself.”

 

“Oh, don’t worry. You manage to do that all on your own already. I’m just helping. It's what friends are for.”

 

“Tch.” I hand her the pot with her tea. “There’s, your Darjeeling. Please choke on it!”

 

Eren clears his throat now. “Umm, I’ve got something for you too.”

 

“Pardon?”

 

He walks to his coat and fumbles out a little box. “Just something small. I hoped it would go well last night, so…here. Merry Christmas, Levi.” 

 

I just stare at him. 

 

Screw Hanji! Why has she to be here? I want to seduce him right now. This beautiful man in my kitchen, with this boyish and almost insecure, sweet look on his face. 

 

“Umm…thanks.” I can finally manage and open the box. It contains a tiny tea cup. One of the white ones with no handle, no ornaments, and just a decorative creasing inside that makes the liquid in it appear to look like a cherry blossom. It is one of the cups in their shop I like to drink out of the most. 

 

“How did you…?”

 

“You always kind of lighten up whenever we hand you one of those, so…well…I thought, you might like one for yourself.”

 

“Thank you, Eren. It is beautiful.”

 

“You’re welcome.”

 

“I have something for you too, you know?”

 

Hanji interrupts us, her timing perfect as always. “Okay, this is about to get gross and too gay for me to handle without feeling ugly afterwards. I’m going to leave now. Levi, I take this tea pot with me. As you very well know, you might want to retrieve it during the next 24 hours or so or it will be covered in plenty of filthy Hanji germs. Thanks for your present, by the way! It is much appreciated.”

 

“Yeah, whatever.”

 

“How I love it, when you’re grumpy. Oh, and Levi?”

 

“Yes?” 

 

“Merry Christmas you arse. I pray god it’s our last.”

 

“Yeah…I love you too, Hanji. Call you later.” 

 

“Bye Levi. And bye Eren. Thanks for making that scowling old face happy.”

 

I shove her out the door and Eren snickers. 

 

“Did you really get a present for me, too? You didn’t have to, you know? Dinner last night was perfect. And the rest too…”

 

“I wanted to. Besides…you gave me a card, remember?” 

 

“I guess I did, huh?” He grins widely. 

 

I hand him a box too, a simple black one with a white ribbon. I’m so bad at wrapping gifts and almost feel ashamed. “It’s nothing big.”

 

He loosens the ribbon, opens the box, and just looks at the content for a moment. 

 

“Hanji took this when we were at your shop together the last time and I thought, you might like it.”

 

He fishes out a framed photograph of him, Mikasa, and Armin, all three behind the tasting counter in their shop. Eren is laughing the most, as always, Mikasa is only turning a silent smile at him, and Armin laughs with an almost shy grin and closed eyes. 

 

“Thank you so much, Levi. I…I don’t know what to say to this. It is wonderful.”

 

“I’m glad. The frame contains two more copies by the way…” My throat is very dry right now with all those emotions flying around us. I look at his astonished face and realise I haven’t told him yet. 

 

“Merry Christmas, Eren.”


	12. Chapter 12

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas Day, part 2

We are just about to kiss—and hopefully continue where we last broke off—as I hear a phone buzzing and playing Right Said Fred’s ‘I’m too sexy’. 

 

I’m looking at Levi with a questioning frown of my eyebrows and he stares back. 

 

“What the fuck is this?” he asks.

 

“This isn’t yours?”

 

“Hell, no!”

 

“Shit,” I curse as I am following the sound of distress. “I’m so sorry! Ymir must have messed with my phone again, when we where at her place for dinner. One day I’m seriously going to kill her for this.”

 

“Need any help with that? Hanji says I’m a very good kicker. I’m bendy.” 

 

“No, but thanks for the offer. I’d love to see that kick though some day.” I finally find my mobile and press the button to answer. “Hi Mikasa.”

 

“Merry Christmas, Eren.”

 

“Merry Christmas to you too, sis.”

 

“Since you aren’t home right now, may we assume your date went well?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“That’s nice. Ymir owes me another ten bucks now. And Jean too.”

 

“Come on! Seriously?” She giggles. “Oh, while we’re at it: Armin and you might want to check your phone settings. The Ymir has struck yet another time.”

 

A sigh. “Damn it. Again? I swear to god, she’s like an annoying twelve-year-old sometimes. Good that Christa is back, that will calm this nonsense down a little bit. At least for now.”

 

“Hopefully.”

 

“What did she choose this time?”

 

“She gave me the ‘I’m too sexy’ ringtone. So very subtle. I’m almost dreading to find out what she chose for incoming text messages.”

 

“Well, lets hope it isn’t as bad as the last time.”

 

“Please don’t remind me of Irene Adler’s moan going off in our shop in full blast. I still have nightmares of customers in shock. She almost ruined Cumberbatch for me with that ringtone.”

 

I hear an amused snort coming from the kitchen, followed by something like ‘unbe-fucking-lievable’.

 

“And her nerve to text us on purpose that day, just to see the look on our faces… Anyway. What are your plans for today? Are you coming home? Or should we celebrate without you, so you two can have the day for your own?”

 

“We just woke up half an hour ago, so we didn’t really talk about that yet.”

 

“What about the both of you coming over for afternoon tea so we can all celebrate together? Please bring Levi if he wants to. We would love to have him here with us.”

 

“That sounds lovely. Please wait a second, I’ll ask.” I turn around to Levi who is standing at the kitchen counter, having a private moment alone with his tea. “Would you like celebrating Christmas with us tonight? We could go there for afternoon tea.”

 

He nods in silent response before adding “sure. I’d like that.” I give him a happy grin.

 

“Mikasa? We’ll be there. Thank you.”

 

“You’re welcome, Eren. See you guys later.”

 

“Bye.”

 

I switch off the alarm of my phone—just in cases—and return to my matcha so it doesn’t turn cold. “This isn’t too sudden for you, I hope. Spending Christmas with the three of us?”

 

“Not at all. I’m glad you let me be a part of it.” 

 

“Of course we do.” He smiles and my heart warms up at that sight. “So. We’ve officially got a free pass for the next hours.” I wiggle my eyebrows. “What would you like to do?” 

 

“Hm. I can imagine a thing or two…” He is placing his empty bowl into the sink and I copy him with mine.

 

“You could show me what you meant earlier. Something about you being ‘bendy’?”

 

“I could do that. Let’s see. Where were we interrupted before?” 

 

His eyes look up into mine. They are dark again, making me feel like a tiny little mouse in front of a hungry cat. My heart first stutters, then races, and my stomach flips over in anticipation. 

 

“I think we stopped somewhere about here…” I swear to god that his voice almost purrs now, as he lowers it and grips me. He pulls me closer, but instead of kissing me he just leans over and whispers into my ear. “Are you fond of your voice Eren?” 

 

And as if all of this wouldn’t already be enough for me—his irritating question while his hands holding me, his body so close, his wonderful scent washing over me, and his voice directly at my ear, where its breath tickles me to send shivers down my spine—he sticks out his tongue to slowly lick over my neck, up to my ear and begins to nibble at it. 

 

My mind goes blank immediately and where maybe a minute ago I might have been able to come up with something interesting or funny or even sophisticated to say, I instantly melt into a pile of brainless, needy mush. Did he really find that sensitive spot of mine so quickly? It isn’t fair. 

 

The only two things that come up in my mind in response are a sighed “ahh…!” followed by an eloquent “what?” 

 

And after a trembling chuckle of his on my skin another one: “mh!” 

 

Hello, my name is Eren and apparently I have the volubility of a two-year-old. And it is all his fault.

 

“I said: Are you fond your voice, Eren?” Another wet lick across my ear lobe all the way up to the tip. Tiny stars start to flash behind my closed eyes. I want him to continue doing exactly this but, oh god, I need more. Much more! 

 

_Say something. Just something. Anything!_

 

A whimper escapes me and I seem to have forgotten how to speak entirely now. So I am only left to answer him with a small shrug of my shoulders and a somewhat desperate nod. 

 

“Did you say something? I can’t hear you.” He’s driving me crazy. 

 

_Hello voice? Mayday, mayday! Are you there?_

 

“I…– ahh!” he is biting my neck now, gently but definite, and it’s bringing me down to my knees with a blissful scream, only that he is already steadying me with his strong arms, before I can take the fall.

 

“You were saying?” I can hear the smugness in his voice. That cunning arse! 

 

“…ah! I guess so.”

 

“Good,” he hums into my ear again. “Then you will love what I’m about to do to it!”

 

A second later he is gone and I have trouble to catch myself from stumbling. My head is dizzy and out of control after his words, my body feels cold without him, lonely and vulnerable. 

 

I look around and finally spot him going to the bathroom, slowly stripping down while walking. It is like he is a magnet and my legs just scuffle after him without any choice of my own. Not that I wanted it otherwise…

 

We’re standing in front of the shower now, he is already completely naked, and I have to gulp at that sight. I didn’t really have the time to fully appreciate him yesterday. He looks back at me, his face showing amusement and hunger at the same time. 

 

“Take off your clothes.” 

 

My fingers are flying to obey, pushing down my pants and only a second later the shirt goes off of my chest, too. 

 

He holds on to my wrist and steps into the shower, pulling me inside next to him. Before he turns on the water he rotates the shower head so that the first seconds of cold water don’t hit us, and I hug him from behind, now placing kisses of my own on his neck, running my fingers along his sides. Why isn’t he ticklish? That would be such a great opportunity right now. 

 

As if he could read my mind he turns around and starts to kiss me again. On the lips this time and I sigh in relief, thankful for a short break. Our cocks are pressing against each other, making us both shudder, while nice warm water is raining down on us. 

 

Slowly his kisses move away from my lips and all the way to my neck again, while he is constantly nibbling and licking in between them and my head starts to spin dangerously yet again. My blood is on fire even before I feel his teeth back on my neck, teasing it, and I scream as I feel his tender bite. 

 

“Levi!”

 

I sense a deep chuckle vibrating through both our bodies and now he starts to carefully suck at my neck, his teeth gradually scratching over my skin, trailing down to my collarbones and back up. 

 

“Ahhh!” 

 

My desperate moans must sound obscene by now, but I don’t care. They are the only way for me to deal with him. Standing on my own has become impossible and I am thankful when he presses me against the wall. 

 

“Mmmhhh, Eren,” he mumbles. “You sound so fucking hot. But I think you can do that even better.”

 

What? How…? Uh! 

 

He goes back to his teasing kisses, bites, licks, and sucks…and exactly as another scream wants to escape my chest again I feel his hand on my dick, his fingers massaging the tip.

 

“AHH-…” my voice breaks. 

 

It is too much. 

 

The warm water, its steam surrounding us, his breaths, that I believe are heavy now, too, so close to my ear, his fingers on me, stroking me in an agonising rhythm that becomes harder and faster now, his mouth caressing me way too perfectly, his sexy body leaning against mine, feeling so damn hot…

 

And then he growls my name with a low, smooth timbre, directly into my ear. “Eren!”

 

I come with a relieved groan and he breaks away from me to watch it eagerly, but not without still holding me in place so I don’t fall. 

 

His eyes look like those of a madman now and pure delight shows on his face. “You are so damn sexy, you know that?”

 

My vocal chords decide to keep on leaving me mute, but at least I slowly find myself able to stand on my own again. I know his calm, composed appearance is only partly real. His voice is shaking and rough and his erection almost looks painfully hard and twitching.

 

In grin. Payback time! 

 

Or, as the Klingons say, _bortaS bIr jablu’DI’ reH QaQqu’ nay_ \- revenge is a dish best served cold. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> To those who don’t know the Right Said Fred song, check it out [here](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=P5mtclwloEQ).   
> [Irene Adler](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z1hcFQzeq_Q) wasn’t very far from that.


	13. Chapter 13

… so I kiss him, I long for his lips now anyway. He gives me a thankful sigh, his naughty, strong hands embracing me desperately now, hugging me close.

 

His constant, almost flowing, change of personality keeps on astonishing me. Gentle, grumpy, loving, rough, caring, teasing, sensitive, verbally abusing…all of this seems to simmer inside of him and it is so utterly endearing, so perfect, that I want it all. I need every bit of it. 

 

And now I want him to feel overwhelmed for a change, want to take care of him in return.

 

My hands sink deep into his hair, the wetness of it only increases the resemblance with pitch black ink, and I let my body grind tardily against his for a few times to press him against the wall, before breaking away and looking into his eyes. 

 

I pull away my hands, letting them trail down to his neck, over his shoulders and all the way down to his hands to squeeze them. I smirk at him again and kneel down, my eyes fixated on his, that suddenly widen in surprise. 

 

“Eren…?” 

 

My hands reassuringly squeeze his one more time, before I place them on his hip instead, gently caressing his muscles there with my thumbs—I definitely have to marvel at his abs later…oh my god! 

 

I avert my eyes to his now very obvious problem, open my mouth and lick over his tip. 

 

A sharp hissing sound and his sudden grip of his fingers around the back of my head spur me on. I lick once more, circling him, and as I feel a subtle push of his hips I slowly take him into my mouth whilst looking up again to observe his reactions. 

 

They are breathtaking. 

 

His head falls back against the wall with a dull thump, his lips are parted, his eyes shut. An almost inaudible sigh escapes his mouth and as I retreat to suck him right back in again his head snaps forward and his gaze meets mine in a sparkling, glistening grey. It looks astonished, admiring and so cutely stunned, that I have to laugh—his length in my mouth, my hands on his arse and everything. 

 

He grins back in delight and lets his head fall back again with another blissful sigh.

 

 

I wanted to take my time but it is a lost cause. I can feel how hard he is in my mouth. I hear his heavy breath and his hands that are holding my head are slightly shaking. 

 

And as I know now: He likes my moans. How would he love them vibrating through his cock?

 

Time to find out! 

 

Still not averting my eyes from his features I inhale and send a long hum right at his body.

 

“OH!” 

 

Seems like he likes it. 

 

So I do it again, only even heavier, deeper.

 

“Fuck, Eren…!”  


 

His hips jolt forward now, unable to hold back any longer.

 

“Eren?” He shoots a look at me now. Pleading and warning me at the same time. “I’m…” 

 

I let out another encouraging hum and feel his whole body freeze for a second, just before he shudders and his hot spasms shoot into my mouth. It is spellbinding and I want to have more. 

 

Instead I just lick him gently one more time, pull away to stand up again, and fetch the shampoo bottle on a hanging tray next to us. 

 

I turn a questioning gaze at him, my lips in a knowing smile, and let my eyebrows wiggle playfully. 

 

“Look at you, feeling all self-satisfied,” he rumbles, his breaths still heavy.

 

“Hm,” I just answer cheerfully, and squeeze some shampoo into my hands, foam it up, and run my fingers back into his hair as I pull him closer to me. His arms wrap around me and he lets his head fall back, watching me tending to his head, his neck, shoulders and armpits—still not ticklish… damn!—and all over his chest. 

 

Soon my hands are empty so I reach out for some more shampoo, distribute in on my own hair now, and since I’ve taken too much, and my hands are still soapy, I tend back to him again, massaging his scalp thoroughly. 

 

He hums with pleasure.

 

It’s gradually getting slippery between us with all the soap and now I lift my hands upwards to make his hair stand up in a pointy, soapy tip. 

 

He looks so utterly cute that I can’t help it any more and laugh.

 

“This is so adorable! I wish you could see yourself.” 

 

“Tch!”

 

As I continue giggling he rolls his eyes and without warning opens the door of the shower. 

 

What? Is he leaving? 

 

He steps in front of the foggy mirror, not caring about the mess he leaves on the floor, and wipes over the surface with one of his hands. The look on his face as he sees his reflection—shocked, amazed, hilarious—is so priceless, that I'm snorting with laughter now. 

 

He walks back into the shower, a revengeful grin showing all over his face, closes the door behind him again, and dashes forward. 

 

Unfortunately for me: I _am_ ticklish. Very. I have to struggle to stay on my feet and soon I laugh so hard that I have a serious stitch and hiccups going on. Finally he stops with his harassment on my ribs and leans forward to kiss me shortly. 

 

Eventually we accomplish to finish our shower somehow, kissing, caressing, and exploring each other and he wraps me tightly into a big fluffy towel afterwards, takes another smaller one and rubs my hair dry, so it stands around me in very messy spikes. 

 

“Who’s looking cute now?” he asks with a proud gaze at my head and I stick out my tongue at him in response. 

 

I truly am a wizard with words today. 

 

He beams at me, fetches a third towel to wrap it around his hips, and turns to the mirror cabinet in front of the bathroom sink. 

 

I wiggle to loosen my towel so I can use my arms properly. He tucked me into that like a baby.

 

“You can use my hair brush of you’d like.” He hands it to me, almost accusingly, as if he didn’t know if I would be comfortable with that. 

 

“Thanks.” I rub away the condensed steam on one of the mirrors and run the brush shortly through my hair. It will tousle up again later anyway, but at least it will have some sort of a direction now.

 

“I also bought spare toothbrushes.” 

 

Plural? 

 

Levi opens the cabinet now. In it lies a variety of brand new toothbrushes and I stare at him with a question. He turns away with a small frown of his eyebrows. After the last few hours I recognise this as insecureness. 

 

He looks gorgeous. But it almost breaks my heart to see him so unsure.

 

Something must have happened to him in his past. I’ve already realised it before, but right now it is so clear and obvious, that it hits me right in the guts. There must be a reason for his usually so admiringly blunt and direct manner to totally shut down when it comes to relationship issues, intimacy or anything close to that. 

 

What has this wonderful, strong, and loving man experienced that could make him so unconfident? Who did this to him? 

 

My protective instincts shoot up, roar for battle, and I feel so helpless all of a sudden, because I can not do anything right now to make this go away. I want to hit that person, that is responsible for his hurt and sadness.

 

But well, maybe I can do some thing after all. I step behind him, kiss the top of his head and wrap my arms around his waist to pull him close. He tentatively looks at me through the mirror and I try to make my smile as warm as I can with this lump in my throat and the anger still rushing through my stomach.

 

“Thank you! One would have been more than efficient enough, though, you know? How should I use all of these at once? Maybe we should give some of them to charity or we could use them to scrub your floors. We could make a toothbrush scrubbing party. Like they do in the army? Only with fun. It will be marvellous! Hanji will be delighted, I bet.” 

 

A sharp laugh. Finally. “Yeah. She will flee the country, I guess.”  


 

“Well, at least she gave us some condoms to survive.”

 

“I’m so going to kill her for that.”  


 

“Don’t. That would make her win. We wouldn’t want that, would we?”

 

He sighs. And I rock him back and forth slowly in my embrace, showing him I am still here. 

 

And after a minute: “Is it disturbing you that my flat is so clean?”

 

“Not at all. I like it. It fits you somehow.”

 

“I just like cleaning…”

 

“Great. You will _love_  my place.” I grin honestly now, plant another kiss on his shoulder, and just unwrap one of the toothbrushes to brush my teeth.

 

\- - -

 

We even manage to put on some clothes without instantly landing in bed with each other again. Dressing together is an interesting experience though. It almost is even more arousing than watching him undress. I just want to make him all naked again as soon as his dark jumper slips over his chest and I step next to him to poke his abs in admiration. 

 

“Where did you get these?” I ask him in awe and let my fingers wander under his pullover to trace his contours. 

 

“I’m Batman!”

 

“Hmm. That’s so hot!” 

 

“Thought so.” 

 

I’m so glad he is back to being sarcastic again. I can manage that. I even love it. And before my curious fingers can do more than explore his wool covered skin I search for my shirt that flew away in a haste before we ‘showered’. 

 

The whole bathroom experience has left us really hungry for something to eat after all so we decide to search the fridge for food. Apparently it is stuffed for the Holidays but we just go with the leftovers of the lasagna from yesterday. It’s still delicious. 

 

After eating he goes back into the bathroom to quickly clean up after our soapy mess on the floor—and something that sounds to be the cat litter box—while I take care of our dishes in the kitchen. 

 

Lizzy strolls around my legs and as she looks up at me with her golden eyes I crouch down to stroke her fur. She purrs so easily and I have to admit to be twisted around her finger already. 

 

“I will watch out for him.” I promise her with a quiet mumble, while my hands curl her head what she seems to enjoy most. She blinks at me and moves even closer as if she would understand my words. “Will you help me to make him happy?” Another blink with a cute little scrunching of her nose makes me feel all fuzzy inside and I sheepishly smile at her. 

 

“Thanks for approving of me,” I tell her solemnly after a few seconds of extensive purring, poking, and nuzzling. 

 

“Well she better is,” I hear Levi’s voice coming closer and I grin up at him before standing up again. “But I have to say, I’m thankful, too.” 

 

He opens a drawer to get out a box of cat food and Lizzy eagerly whizzes away from me and to her feeding dish to miaow in anticipation. It makes him laugh in affection. I’m getting addicted to this sound. 

 

“So. What do you usually do on quiet days like this?” I ask. 

 

“Drinking tea, reading, watching a film. Cosy snuggling up with my girl.” He points at the frenzy beast that used to be a cat a second ago, but greedily stuffs herself with all the fresh food at this moment.

 

“May I join you with that?” 

 

“Tch.”

 

Yay, he is grumpy again! The darksome minute in the bathroom is still hunting me a bit, and I feel relieved. 

 

“As if you have to ask.” 


	14. Chapter 14

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Cosy times.

Before I fully realise it we end up under a blanket on my couch, a steaming pot of tea with an opened box of shortbread in front of us, and both of us reading. Eren took a quick look trough my library and picked up Patrick Rothfuss’ ‘The Slow Regard of Silent Things’ and was thrilled to notice I even had a signed copy with my name in it, from when the author visited Germany a while back. It’s one of my favourites – of course I had let it signed when the opportunity was presenting itself. And seeing mister Rothfuss in person, listening to his interview, reading, and his booming laughter had been a wonderful experience as well. 

 

I simply return to my book from a few days ago…is has been awfully neglected since then. There have been more urgent things on my mind than reading a bloody urban fantasy novel about shape shifters in Atlanta after receiving that card of his.

 

The whole scene feels strangely surreal. Eren’s legs next to mine, his whole body warming me. His feet at my side and mine resting at his, feeling his even breathing expanding and then evening out his chest again and again. Only his hair visible around the book’s frame, in a ruffled crown that is almost too adorable to bear. All this while I also rest on my couch, a book of my own in my hand, as I probably would have ended up doing today anyway between or even during Hanji’s treasured visits. 

 

Lizzy came to join us soon after we nestled down here, resting on the back rest of the sofa between us and drifting away into noisy dreams again. 

 

It already feels like _our_ sofa _._ Has it really been not even one day yet since I brought him here?

 

Again, I can’t truly bring myself to fully concentrate on reading. I’d much rather watch him. Absorb everything. His face behind the book, his tender hands holding it fondly, almost caringly, and sometimes when he flips over a page I get a quick glimpse at his eyes, keenly looking at the words in front of him. 

 

Poking at his ticklish feet in my socks from time to time is too tempting. Even if this means being the target of some casual, revengeful kicks every now and then. It also means to earn one of his precious smiles. So yeah, I actually might be tempted to do this a lot. 

 

“The sketches in here are amazing,” he says, lowering the book, his eyes very turquoise again and beaming at me in delight. “And the story is so wonderfully written. Have you already read it?”

 

“Yes, I have. I like it too.”

 

“It just has that special ring to it, that I can’t put my finger on. It’s so lovely.”

 

“Wait until you read the epilogue. I got goosebumps.”

 

“ _You_ got goosebumps. Really?” he teases me. “Can’t wait to read it!”

 

What a brat! I pinch his little toe in return. He twitches his foot, and there is this smile again. I’m hooked. 

 

_I never want this to end._ This thought suddenly shoots through my mind, coming out of nowhere and making me almost sad. Almost. 

 

This is real. He is actually, truly here, isn’t he? And he stayed. Overnight. Apparently wanting it too. He didn’t flee in the morning. No hasty goodbye, no disgusted look or ashamed glances. No excuses why he abruptly had to leave. And it is Christmas. He could actually have a very good reason to just go. To spend the time with his family. Or friends. Or doing whatever he’d love to do. 

 

But no. Instead he is just laying on my couch next to me, not screaming out of sheer agony, and on the contrary certainly appearing to enjoy himself. As if this whole situation was as natural to him as breathing. 

 

He even handled Hanji this morning for crying out loud! And that in a very sweet way. As if he already had years of practise with that. And apparently he doesn’t even mind her living downstairs as if it wasn’t something weird with her having the keys to my place, and just letting herself in, whenever she pleases. Peeping on my dates behind closed doors and being way too nosy for a fucking normal person.

 

Lizzy adores him quite openly. And—what a relief!—he apparently loves her already, too. He keeps on surprising me with his wonderful, endearingly crazy mind. He even makes me laugh. Not to mention his ravishing moans during sex… Which is amazing as well. I think about showering earlier and feel my trousers getting too tight again.

 

He is so incredible. Better than I ever dared to hope for. 

 

So why am I still on the edge here? Afraid that he would change his mind any moment now. Frightened, he would hurt me or do something even worse, whatever that may be. Scared I would hurt him…

 

Maybe he is schizophrenic. And soon his other personality will surface and go into shock when it notices me. Or he could just see me as an experiment? Look how far he can take it with the old, sad man that I am? Maybe he has an evil twin.

 

Or he is making a bet with someone and with me as target? 

 

No, he wouldn’t do that! But why is he still here then? Drinking tea with me on fucking Christmas Day as if we would have been doing this for years and obviously feeling at ease? 

 

He doesn’t feel the same as me, does he? 

 

I sense a sudden nudging of his foot against my rib cage and I snap back to reality. “Hm?” I ask him.

 

“What’s up? You seemed gloomy all of a sudden. Do you mind me being here?”

 

“What? No!” Please, stay!

 

“Good. I plan on staying, you know? You won’t get rid of me so fast.”

 

_Is he able to read my mind?_

 

“No, I’m not.” 

 

As I raise my eyebrows in surprise he laughs in a short snort. It sounds honest. 

 

“You should see the look on you face,” he grunts.

 

“Tch.”

 

I pretend to go back to reading. What was this book about in the first place? Uh, Kate Daniels. I remember. And something about an ice giant and a tournament on the last pages, while one of the werewolves being in trouble…

 

“We should leave soon,” he says. “It is 3pm already. Are you sure you want to join us? I would love to have you there, but if you’d feel uncomfortable, we could…”

 

“No, I want to be there.”

 

“I’m glad. Thank you.”

 

“Should I change?” I look down at my jumper, loosely hanging around my shoulders. 

 

He just shakes his head. “No, you’re fine. Its just Mikasa and Armin.”

 

“True as that may be… it is your family.”

 

“So?”

 

I roll my eyes. I won’t say I’m nervous. Even if it is just a tiny bit. It doesn’t suit old grumpy men to be nervous over a silly little thing like this.  “Easy for you to say in that suit of yours you just had to shamelessly wipe under my nose yesterday.”

 

“So you liked it?” I think even Hanji can notice his beam a few meters down the stairs. 

 

“Liked it? You tortured me on purpose with this thing all evening!”

 

“Hmm. And you still liked it. And it worked. Didn’t it?”

 

I grind my teeth. 

 

“Trust me. You’ll be fine just the way you are.” He stands up now and I feel his comforting warmth besides me fading away already. “And if you want to I could just leave the suit on later without changing, you know?”

 

“You cruel brat. You really would do that?”

 

“If it would mean you taking me back home with you? Any time.” He leans down to kiss me and my heart speeds up again. 

 

What? He really wants to accompany me back home again tonight?

 

“Don’t Mikasa and Armin miss you when you leave them alone?” Since the dawn of time evasive questions have always been a good diversional strategy. 

 

“They wouldn’t mind if it made me happy.”

 

And before my thoughts can go wondering about what on earth he could possibly mean by that he simply pulls me up, fetches his suit coat—that, after ripping it off him yesterday, I picked up to store it in the wardrobe—and we make ourselves ready. 

 

Before we leave we knock on Hanji’s door. I want to retrieve my tea pot she took down with her this morning and she might want to know where we’re headed… Sometimes she really goes crazy when she doesn’t know where I am, and I don’t want her to have a panic attack tonight. 

 

She hugs Eren in a sweet way that is so very much unlike her it almost creeps me out a bit, boxes me into my shoulder with a happy snort, that makes all the creepiness go away instantly, and wishes us a ‘merry gay Christmas’ again, before sending us off to our afternoon tea. 

 

As we step out of the building and into the freezing cold I want to shove my hands into my pockets as usual. But Eren grips my right one to link my fingers with his. 

 

An emotional lump forms in my throat, so I wrinkle my brows to cover that up. I’m so savvy!

 

He squeezes my hand shortly but stays quiet apart from that and I don’t know if I honestly managed to fool him or if he understands and just doesn’t want to make me feel embarrassed. I squeeze back and notice how his ears blush under his cap again. 

 

“Where do you live anyway?”

 

“It is not far. We were lucky enough to get a place almost next to the shop. It’s really just around the corner.”

 

_So close._

 

What a relief that I’m just learning this now. A week ago the pure thought of him just being only a few streets away would have driven me out of my mind. Today I simply feel happy about it instead. He is never far away. Assumed he wants to continue this. Whatever ‘this’ is. I don’t want to ask or push him about it. Still I can’t help to be curios. Just a little bit anyway. 

 

“It actually is quite nice to live so close to work,” he adds. “I hate public transport here.”

 

I snort in response “Yeah. Growing up close to London really pampers you with that, huh?”

 

“Tell me about it. You work from home office, right?”

 

“Yes I do. And I got so used to it by now, I probably won’t even be able to work in a proper office anymore. Not even considering enjoying the perks of being my own boss.”

 

“I quite believe that. Can’t picture you in an office with a lot of coworkers anyway.”

 

I shove him playfully for that comment. 

 

We walk past the now empty and darkened Tearoom and turn around a corner before he comes to a stop and me with him. 

 

“Ready?” he wants to know while searching his pockets for the keys, his other hand still holding on to mine.

 

“Tch.”

 

“How I love it when you say that.”

 

I don’t really know how to respond to that any differently than with another grumpy “Tch.”

 

“So hot…!” 

 

Before I can show what an amazing genius I am by letting out a third one he already has opened the door and guides me inside. 

 

“We have to walk up one floor.” 

 

We do that and soon we are standing in front of an old looking wood door. 

 

He uses his keys again and a bright, cosy looking place greets us. There is a poster decorated hallway right in front of the entrance that seems to lead into the kitchen and a second, much wider but also shorter hallway to our right that apparently has four, no five, adjacent rooms. 

 

“We’re home,” he calls and I hear a joyful shout coming out of the kitchen—it must be Armin’s—, ending in some shuffling noise.

 

The corner in which the corridors meet is furnished into a neat wardrobe, decorated with a large Kill Bill 2 poster, and some smaller film themed postcards next to it. I can recognise Fight Club, Watchmen, Harry Potter, Mitty, and some more before Armin walks up to us with a bright smile, followed by Mikasa. 

 

Is she really wearing this red scarf all the time?

 

“Hey Levi, please come in!” Armin calls out before hugging Eren shortly.

 

“Hi you two,” Mikasa adds in her friendly, calm voice. “Nice to see you. Merry Christmas!”

 

“Merry Christmas!” I greet them both back and almost feel irritated about the lack of teasing comments, nosy questions, and embarrassing leers. 

 

Instead they just seem happy, honestly grateful, to have us both here. Eren embraces Mikasa with a hug of his own and we free ourselves from shoes, coats, and gloves—and cap in Eren’s case. 

 

“You’re right on time. The tea just got ready.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Slow Regard Of Silent Things really is an amazing novella. It is wonderfully weird, thoughtful, and the story has so many facets that you have to adore it. Very BIG recommendation. And yes, the epilogue is a real tear-jerker!
> 
> The book that Levi is reading is the third volume of the Kate Daniels series by Ilona Andrews.


	15. Chapter 15

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Gift giving.

We move into the kitchen where I am greeted by the lovely smell of black tea, and some sort of roast in the oven, while Phil Collins’s voice is singing ‘True Colours’ in some sort of a cappella version—it must be his ‘Love Songs. A Compilation’ album I think, I’ve never heard it anywhere else—from a small speaker in the corner. 

 

The whole room is huge, with the kitchen counter and a free kitchen island expanding from the entrance in front of me right up to the big windows ahead and taking in only about half of the whole space. To my right there stands a long wooden table, making this some sort of a comfortable dining room kitchen. 

 

I like it at once. 

 

On the table I spot a set of china, a steaming teapot, and a plate with biscuits next to a couple of flickering candles arranged between some fir branches on a tray. 

 

“Please have a seat, Levi,” Mikasa encourages me and I chose a chair next to a window framed door that leads to a small balcony, lit by a chain of fairy lights.

 

“Thank you, Mikasa.” 

 

Eren fetches us some glasses and water and sits down next to me, so close that our legs touch. I don’t know why but it instantly calms down my nerves.

 

“What a nice kitchen you have! So big.”

 

“Isn’t it?” Armin beams as he pours us the tea. “I loved it from the second we first saw it. And it is so great to cook in. This building is over one hundred years old but the kitchen is brand new. This place really felt like winning the lottery.”

 

“I believe that.”

 

We fall into a comfortable silence as we start to drink the tea and I feel a little touched as I spot my favourite kind of shortbread. 

 

“Mum and Dad called earlier,” Mikasa tells Eren after a short while. “They send their love.”

 

“Thank you. I will call them back later. How are things up there?”

 

Armin snickers. “Good, apparently. Grisha gave himself a cross trainer for Christmas. Your Mum finds it hilarious of course.” 

 

Eren rolls his eyes in a knowing way and grins. “Did you open the presents already?” he asks. 

 

“No, not yet,” Mikasa answers. “When you said you’d come over this afternoon we decided to wait with that.” She smiles at me happily.

 

“I’m sorry I didn’t bring anything. I didn’t know I’d be here before this morning.”

 

“Please, don’t mind, Levi. We’re happy to have you.” 

 

\- - - 

 

Afternoon tea with them is almost irritatingly comfortable. Armin does most of the talking with Eren joining him a lot, while Mikasa mainly listens in her silently attentive way. They don’t pressure me into their conversation, just happily integrate me as they chat about their parents and daily life.

 

As the first pot of tea is finished I almost feel completely at ease already and Mikasa stands up to brew us a second one. The worries that had been keeping to creep up on me today fade more and more, something that usually takes Hanji’s tough talk to achieve. Or just homely dialogue with these three, and Eren simply sitting next to me, as is seems.

 

We leave the kitchen to watch the Queen’s Christmas speech on TV, old habits die hard, I guess, and it feels nice to share this nostalgic tradition with them. 

 

The living room is more like a parlour mixed with a small library. A tall Christmas tree is rising in front of the windows, decorated with red ball ornaments, fairy lights, and some straw stars that appear to be handmade. 

 

Two small sofas stand in a corner close to the windows next to the tree, and three Christmas stockings are hanging on a rope in front of the book shelves, the names Armin, Eren, and Mikasa neatly stitched onto them in golden letters. Each one of them is stuffed with a plush toy. I smile at the old and clearly loved, time-worn, grey bunny in Eren’s sock that has a small knitted red scarf wrapped around its neck. It fits him somehow. Armin’s stocking contains a beige teddy bear and Mikasa’s a colourful rag doll with black wool yarn as hair. My heart makes a small jump as I notice a smaller, obviously provisional, forth sock clipped to Eren’s with my name in some sort of crayon written on it. It’s empty but the mere thought of it touches me.

 

We sit down on the sofas, Mikasa and Armin sharing one and Eren snuggling up next to me with a cheeky wiggle of his eyebrows as he does so. He still wears his gorgeous suit and my fingers itch to take it off of him again. At least he has peeled himself out of the jacket already, when we came in…a wise decision. That thing is way too tempting for my taste. 

 

He smells so nice, I notice once again as his warmth begins to settle over me, comforting me, and my arm wraps around his waist all on its own, pulling him closer. We let ourselves sink into the cushions and listen to Elizabeth II’s speech.

 

… only that I don’t fully concentrate on it… 

 

I watch the TV lights flicker in his big eyes, casting soft shadows on his beautiful face, and listen to his calm breaths. 

 

The fact that he is not only next to me, but also in my arms, hits me once again. I feel tenderness rise up inside me, and since it may not be quite appropriate to undress him in front of his family I settle on the next best thing, and run my hand through his hair, let my fingertips crawl his scalp, and just enjoy his company. 

 

He huddles against me even closer, pulling a blanket around us, and I feel his heartbeat going up a bit, just about as mine does, too. 

 

The speech is over way too quickly this time, at least for my taste, and Armin merrily calls out for gift giving. 

 

He and Mikasa stand up and distribute their presents while Eren just stays with me, obviously not intending to get up if he doesn’t have to. Still, he pulls away a little to receive his gifts and unwrap them.

 

Armin hands out a round of Christmas crackers—I totally forgot that I bought some of those for Hanji and me, I suddenly remember—and even has one for me. I thank him and ask Eren to pull on the other end of my cracker, helping him with his afterwards. Mine contains a small plastic toy car, and a yellow Christmas crown, alongside a a silly joke, and since the other three put on their crowns I give in with a sigh and put on mine too. Eren grins at me and pecks me on the cheek for that.

 

“You look like the most adorable Christmas crowned king with that grim frown of yours.” he mumbles into my ear so the others can’t hear it. 

 

“Tch. Whatever…” But I give him a little smile. As if it was the universe’s plan to mock me his crown is bright turquoise and matches his eyes perfectly. Of course.

 

Mikasa and Armin hand him his presents before opening theirs, and I watch all of them unbox. 

 

Mikasa beams over a new scarf from Eren and hugs him so thankfully that he blushes slightly and rests his head on my shoulder to hide it.

 

Eren unwraps a bright orange jumper he immediately burrows his nose in as if to smell it and a book from Armin. 

 

“The Princess Bride? Thanks, Armin. And for the jumper too.”

 

“You’re welcome. Since you know the film inside out I thought it was time you’d finally read the book, as well. It’s the 30th Anniversary Edition with a new foreword.”

 

“Is it good?” I ask him. 

 

“You don’t know it?” Eren asks.

 

“No. They mention it in the book series I was reading today, but I haven’t read it yet.”

 

“Well, you should at least watch the film some day,” Armin says. “It’s a real masterpiece. And it’s Eren’s favourite.”

 

Another blush on Eren’s face. And Mikasa is suddenly watching us curiously, as if to search for some sort of sign on our features. Why? Did I miss something? I am so going to watch that film!

 

He attends to the present from his sister now and a few seconds later he has a couple of DVD cases in his hands. Now it’s my turn to grin. 

 

“Dexter? Nice!”

 

“You’ve seen it?” Eren asks me. 

 

“Yes, at least the first season. Hanji brought it over one weekend and we watched the whole first twelve episodes in one day. It’s absolutely brilliant.”

 

“Thank you, sis!”

 

“I hope, you’ll like it. Jean told me about it and I thought it might be nice for you, too.”

 

“I’m looking forward to it!” he grins and stands up to hug her, before sitting down next to me again. 

 

\- - - 

 

“Would you like to stay for dinner?” Armin asks after all the presents are unwrapped. His pink Christmas crown that’s resting in his ears suits him perfectly. “We’ve got enough for everyone, but if you would like to go home again, Levi, we’d understand.”

 

“No, thank you. I’d like to join you. Can I help?”

 

“Really? That would be great. Thanks!”

 

We make our way back into the kitchen again and once more I am distracted by Eren’s look in his goddamn suit. I want to grab him and shove him into one of the rooms nearby to do some very impure things to him. Like touching him in improper places until he will moan and yell my name again. If I’m not corrected my marks from this morning are starting to show very clearly. Right under the collarbone of his shirt his skin looks bruised and swollen…so seductive. I feel my fingertips tingle again. He’s like a drug.

 

As if he noticed my stares he lets himself fall back to me. 

 

“Should I change?” he whispers knowingly with a wink.

 

“Depends…” I simply reply and glare at him with my best stare. 

 

“On what?”

 

“Well.” I step closer now, pushing him back against the next wall. “Do you have something ugly and unbelievably hideous that won’t make me want to fuck you senseless right on this spot?”

 

He gulps but holds my gaze. “I can’t promise that.” His voice sounds hoarse.

 

“What a shame…” I want to eat him up. He should know that. I need him to know! S o I lean closer and softly lick over a purplish spot on his neck with a greedy hum while sliding one hand under his shirt, caressing his ribs.

 

“Can’t wait for tonight.” He gasps after a moment. 

 

“Me neither.” Another lick. It’s addictive.

 

“Mhh…maybe I should pack a bag for the next few days?” 

 

YES! Please do! “Splendid.”

 

“Yeah?”

 

“Mhhhhh,” I hum at his adams apple with a nibbling kiss. But on the other hand… “I think you might not need any clothes, though.”

 

“Think so?”

 

“Just a feeling.” I let my hand stroke over his crotch now.

 

“Well.” He clears his throat. “We could establish a ‘naked holiday’…”

 

“Perfect.” I’m pulling my hand away. It’s too compelling. “Lizzy won’t mind about naked days too, I’m sure.”

 

A laugh. “The way she peeped at us doing silly stuff in the shower today might imply something else however, don’t you think?”

 

So he has noticed her, sitting on the toilet the whole time. Watching us. As she almost always does when I use the shower. I for my share have gotten used to that by now, even if I haven’t figured out why the bloody hell she loves to do that. Even after all these years. 

 

Maybe it’s a weird, crazy, cat thing. Maybe it’s only a Lizzy thing. Maybe it’s a Levi’s cats thing. Anyway, I can’t change the fact that she simply loves observing nude, wet people, surrounded by steam and the smell of shampoo. Mister Darcy did too if I properly recall, now that I think about it…

 

“She loves shower peeking. Always has. Always will, I guess. Bathing time too, by the way.”

 

“I absolutely adore your cat. Honestly. But even you have to admit, that this habit of her’s might be kind of creepy.”

 

“It is. But what did you expect with her being my girl?”

 

“True.”

 

“And to be totally honest… If I were her? I’d do exactly the same.”

 

“Such sweet words. I feel touched.”

 

“You should.”

 

“I am.” Greenish-blue eyes are burning their imprint into my soul. Promising me aroused sighs again, and passionate screams, dampened only by rumpled bed sheets. 

 

“… straight back home after dinner?”

 

“Please!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you’d like to you could listen to [Phil Collins’s](http://https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cWqmVx_MIGA) song. Just for the atmosphere.


	16. Chapter 16

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Christmas dinner.

Being pinned against the wall in our corridor by a yellow Christmas crowned Levi with his pitch black hair floating around his fair face, with a dark hunting gaze fixing me like prey should arouse me much less than it actually does. 

 

I feel it in every nerve and I have to struggle to clear my mind again after we finally break apart. 

 

How does he always do that? 

 

He steps back with a sharp hiss that betrays his casual appearance, and I decide it would be a very good idea to pack my sleepover bag right away. Before things get out of control later, that is. What they sure might. I have a feeling.

 

So I slip away into my room and sigh as I take the sight in. Staying at his flat for only one day apparently has gotten me used to tidiness. Which is not really my strength as I have to admit, now that I stand in the middle of a chaos out of my clothes, scattered around all over the place and on my unmade bed. How did I _live_ that way? 

 

I hear a short, surprised laugh escaping me. Who cares? I simply shrug my shoulders and start packing, randomly picking up a few trousers, socks, shirts, and some things to sleep in, and stuffing it all into a bag, without really minding folding the clothes beforehand. 

 

I step out of my room again, only to fetch some bathroom supplies, and my presents, and pack them as well. Never go alone… Something like that. This time I fold the jumper before I pack it—it’s new and from Armin.

 

Before my love-crazed mind can wander off again to push me into the kitchen, and to him, whether I want to or not, I call my parents with our landline phone to wish them merry Christmas. They are at dinner already, so the conversation is quite short, but it is nice to hear their familiar voices nonetheless. 

 

After placing my stuffed bag next to the entrance door I move on into our kitchen. Armin and Levi are standing next to each other at the counter over what appears to be potato dumplings in a steaming pot and I realise they are almost the same hight, Levi only being more broad-shouldered than my childhood friend and more sinuous. They seem to have hit it off already. 

 

What a relief! 

 

Mikasa is setting the table for dinner and I shuffle over to help her. 

 

“Have you checked your phone settings already?” he asks silently, just a little louder than a whisper so she doesn’t hiss whilst speaking. 

 

“No. Should I have?”

 

“Have you received any text messages?”

 

“I don’t know. I switched off my phone right after talking to you earlier.” I feel strangely alerted now. “Why?”

 

“Ymir,” is all she says. And that’s all she has to.

 

Damn! 

 

“What did she do?”

 

“Your ringtone for texts? She called earlier with Christa to wish us all a merry Christmas and asked how you are and how your date went, before cackling like a school girl right before a boy band concert, and spilling the beans.”

 

“Shit. What is it?”

 

“Let me put it this way: What does Westley say to Buttercup?” Mikasa sighs.

 

“Noooo!” I just gasp now, shortly glancing over to Levi if he noticed anything. “Unbelievable. Please tell me she didn’t.”

 

“She did.”

 

“She wouldn’t!”

 

“You know she would.”

 

“Only the quote or the quote plus explanation?”

 

“It’s Ymir, Eren. What do _you_ think?”

 

“That bloody bitch!” 

 

My sister can’t hide a little giggle. “Another ten bucks for me!”

 

“She really doesn’t have a good influence on you, does she?” I state but shake my head with a big grin. Luckily I really _did_ switch off my phone earlier. “So she honestly hacked my phone code, and spied at my texts with Levi just to delight us with the ‘as you wish’ line in the end?”

 

“Yup.” 

 

“That’s even worse than Irene Adler.”

 

“At least it’s more perky, yes. I wouldn’t be surprised if she also saved his number while being at it already.”

 

“You’re probably right. We might have to kill her some day.”

 

“We truly might.”

 

“Levi offered to help already.”

 

“Good. We might need him. I love her like crazy, but it’s a gigantic war with that woman.”

 

“He says he’s a good kicker.”

 

“Perfect. Make him show you.” 

 

“I will.”

 

“Skilled kickers are hard to come by.”

 

“Tell me something I don’t know.”

 

I fold the four napkins Mikasa hands out to me and place them on the plates. Who would have guessed we would have him at our table today a week ago. 

 

“You truly like him,” she interrupts my thoughts.

 

“I do.”

 

“He seems to like you too.”

 

I smile. “Seems so.”

 

She observes me attentively for almost a minute, gaze contemplative and searching for something I can’t really recognise. “We’re so happy for you,” she finally states and her gaze softens fondly. 

 

“Thanks. Me too, Mikasa.”

 

“Armin and I will leave for London alone then, tomorrow?”

 

“Do you mind?”

 

“Not at all. Mum and Dad will understand as well. It’s only for one day anyway. We’ll be back on Sunday evening to open the shop on Monday as usual.”

 

“Thank you sis. I’ll be there.”

 

“You’re welcome. Have a great time.”

 

“We will. May I ask you something, though?”

 

“Sure.” 

 

I hesitate shortly before admitting it to her. “I feel…stranded,…I guess. He has great pain. I want to help him so desperately, but I don’t know how to take it off him.”

 

“Just be yourself,” she says in her calm way that I love so much about my sister. “It might have been only one day but it seems to take effect already. Look.”

 

We glance over to the stove, where Levi and Armin are deep down in a philosophical and passionate discussion about gravy while diligently dissolving butter into it. Armin is cheerful as ever, but even Levi seems almost happy, his frown only slightly visible right now, and this hilarious yellow-papered Christmas crown is adding a strange tone to his usually so dark, gloomy impression.

 

Wow. 

 

I gape at Mikasa and she leers back. 

 

“So. When’s the wedding?” she teases me. 

 

I roll my eyes and take her into a playful headlock, like we used to do when we were little. And then I hurry to instantly adjust my phone settings to pre-Ymir-mode. Just as it should be. Of course she has sent me a few texts so my alarm would hopefully go off eventually. Of course they’re all inappropriate as hell. 

 

She really will have to pay for that phone pranks of her’s some time. 

 

But well. He has a Hanji, I have an Ymir. It just seems fair, I guess, as I walk over to Levi to hug him from behind, and listen to his conversation with Armin. 

 

\- - - 

 

A while later we sit at the table again. A juicy Christmas ham in front of us, accompanied by potato dumplings, peas with bacon, and gravy. Levi and Armin have been continuing to talk about cooking, Armin chatting like a maniac, and Levi keenly listening and adding some sentences of his own from time to time. 

 

It’s almost like watching some kind of male and slightly grimmer version of my sister. S he and I observe the two in their discussion and praise Armin for the food. 

 

I’m sitting next to Levi again and as I rest my hand on his knee he puts away his knife and reaches out to cover my fingers with his. And even though this is such a small gesture my heart makes a treacherous little jump and the butterflies in my stomach flap their wings again like crazy. 

 

The things a simple note on a card can do… 

 

Eating with only a fork is strange, and a real challenge when it comes to the peas, but we master it. After a while his thumb begins to draw small circles onto the back of my hand, and I feel prickling goosebumps rising up my arm, all the way up to my neck and down my spine again. I struggle to suppress a shiver. 

 

Luckily Armin chooses exactly this moment to stand up and fetch the Christmas pudding, brandy butter, rum, and some matches.

 

He pours some alcohol over the pudding and enkindles it, and after the flames have ceased he deals a piece to each of us. 

 

We help ourselves to some brandy butter and dig in. 

 

“It’s delicious, Armin!” Levi praises him. “Did you make the pudding and the sauce yourself as well?”

 

“Yes, indeed. I’m glad you like it. Would you like the recipe?”

 

“If it’s not a secret, yes, please.”

 

Armin grins widely and soon we’re stuffed. Once more. 

 

We help with the dishes and after thanking Armin for the food once more, Levi and I gather our things, say our goodbyes, and leave for his place again. 

 

I for my share think we should get a prize or something for keeping our hands to ourselves until we finally stand in front of his door. Even holding his hand on the way home seems simply too much of a danger zone for me and I don’t even dare to look at him for longer than a second until we enter his building.

 

Maybe putting on the suit jacket again was an unwise choice. I could feel his lingering stare on my back before we left Mikasa and Armin, but it had been just too tempting to tease him. 

 

As we pass Hanji’s flat we hear a chirping voice. “Be safe, boys!” We sigh in defeat. I act out of impulse and knock my fist heavily on her door a few times, eagerly hoping her ear might be curiously pressed to it. 

 

It seems to be my lucky day, I guess as I hear a muffled _“Ouch!”_

 

Levi beams at me in awe. “Holy fuck, that was hot!”

 

I grin back at him. “What’s your prediction? Will she be peeping on us all the time?”

 

“Only one way to find out.” We continue our walk upstairs, wilfully ignoring the loud snogging sounds echoing to us from Hanji’s flat.

 

\- - - 

 

As soon as the door of his flat closes behind us we jump at each other, almost trampling over poor Lizzy who came over to greet us. 

 

We hastily kick off our shoes, tear at each other’s coat until they get carelessly shoved away, and our hands instantly fly to each other’s belt, kissing heavily already. 

 

My bag just gets dropped in a corner as we make our stumbling, blind way into the bedroom, leaving a trail of ripped off clothes behind us, and constantly switching in pushing each other into the right direction. 

 

It is rough again this time. Greedy, after all the hours with almost no touching, no kissing, and constantly restraining ourselves in our need for the other while sitting so close side by side. And it was even worse than all the months before, because now I know how it is to be with him, and my memories really did their best in trying to overpower me all evening.

 

His exploring fingers trail over my skin and set me on fire, his naughty, hot, wet kisses make me dizzy, and I helplessly return the favour in the only way I can come up with in this situation, and which I know that won’t fail: I moan as much as I can. 

 

My screams take their effect immediately and soon I am thrown on his bed, his arms pinning me down, and him making a mess out of me all over again. 

 

It is over as quick as it has begun and way too soon we break apart, laying side by side, both panting heavily, grinning at each other like dorky little kids, and covered in goo.

 

“You’re driving me crazy, you know that?” I gasp as he stands up to fetch us a towel to clean up.

 

“Look who’s talking!”

 

\- - -

 

We end up on the couch again, not keen about going right to sleep already, only dressed in some comfy pants and a shirt, snuggling under a blanket, and looking at each other for a while. I recognise some slightly grey hairs on his head. Only a very few silvery strains between the ebony ones that I can only spot by being this close. It just makes him more fascinating to me. More alive. More _real_. 

 

“I like your eyes,” he whispers. 

 

“Thanks. They help me see, you know?”

 

I know I should not have said that. He lungs at me for another one of his vicious tickle attacks. 

 

“STOP!” I squeal, desperately trying not to hit him with my uncontrolled kicks. And as the hiccups start again, he finally does. 

 

“Look what you’ve done!” I groan. _*hic!*_

 

“Even your hiccup is hot. Did you know that?”

 

“Well, I do now.”

 

“Hmm…” 

 

_*hic!*_

 

“So cute! Does this alway happen when someone tickles you?”

 

_*hic!*_ “N–no…!”

 

“Uh-huh…!” 

 

_*hic!*_

 

“Good to know.”

 

“Oh, crap!” _*hic!*_

 

“…”

 

“…” _*hic!*_

 

“This doesn’t stop, huh?”

 

_*hic!*_ Oh, come on! 

 

“Maybe I should scare you somehow…”

 

“Please, don’t! I would refuse sex.” _*hic!*_ “At least until tomorrow morning…”

 

He just grins and hugs me in an embrace again.

 

“Well. Better letting it out than keeping it in, I guess.”

 

_*hic!*_

 

So we just lay there, on the couch, listening to each other’s heartbeat and waiting for my stupid hiccups to fade. 

 

It’s so cosy… 

 

Before I can completely doze off he pulls me up to tuck me into bed, crawls up next to me, and as he cuddles up at my side I instantly drift away into a deep, dreamless sleep.


	17. Chapter 17

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Waking up on Boxing Day.

As I wake up I immediately know where I am. Yesterday it had been strange for a second and almost like a dream, even if some kind of ‘dream come true’, and it had took me a short moment to fully comprehend where I was, why my limbs felt so sore, and whose warm body was laying next to mine, smelling so compelling. Feeling so right.

 

But today it is all clear to me from the moment my mind goes conscious. And I can’t wait to open my eyes. 

 

As new as this is, it feels as if we have been together for years, and not just for a little over a day. It feels so wonderful. It makes me so utterly happy that my heart can’t keep my emotions just to itself any longer, and I huddle next to the man so close to me. 

 

We both have turned over in our sleep as it seems, from him snuggling against my back yesterday, to my front facing his spine right now. Just as the morning before. I let my leg slip over to rest it between his and wrap my arm around his waist. 

 

So warm. So strong. So perfect. Comfort. Safe. Peace. Home. _Him!_

 

Levi. 

 

And Lizzy again, as I notice now. She seems to like cuddling with him, too. I spot her in the same place as yesterday, rolled-up against his chest in a furry, black ball, sweetly snoring, and at ease.

 

Seeing her adoring him so openly, without reserve, loving him and just being there for him when I hadn’t been all this time pierces my soul, and I am grateful he has her here. I shortly stroke over her soft fur to thank her silently. 

 

Why did I wait so long with this, again? 

 

Lizzy is stretching in her sleep now, making herself long against his chest with a cute, relieved sigh, slowly padding her claws a few times before going back to snoring. The whole picture is so adorable, that my heart wants to melt away. A small, black haired man, all petite and still so massively strong, wonderful, and powerful, laying here im my arm like prince charming, making himself cosy with a fluffy cat. 

 

It’s so sexy too, that I feel my groins pulse in anticipation. I hope it doesn’t wake him up. I want him to be at peace as long as he can. 

 

I want to carry away all his sorrows, make him happy and smile. I don’t know why he trusts me of all people. He obviously has some major issues with that, maybe even a serious fear of commitment, even though he also seems to long for being in a caring relationship at the same time. 

 

Once more I wonder what—who—did that to him. Hanji surely knows, I guess. But I won’t go to her and ask. It would mean stepping over a line I do not intent, or even want, to cross. This is between us. Him and me. And it is all that really matters. 

 

If he wants to tell me, I’ll be there and listen. And if not– well, he surely has his reasons. I could ask him of course. But not now. Not just yet. We have time. 

 

I’ve come to notice I see him as ‘my man’ already. Without any other label, since it would sound strange in my ears anyway. ‘Boyfriend’ surely doesn’t fit him. ‘Romantic interest’ is not untrue but almost laughable, when I think what I want to do to him…with him. ‘Lovers’ feels nothing but gooey to me and ‘soul mates’—even though in theory very nice and sweetly irrevocable—has such a foolishly pretentious ring to it when it comes to him. 

 

Sometimes you just don’t need a definite word for something. Things are what they are anyway. And he simply is my man.

 

And I want everything. 

 

So I breathe him in. I let my nose nuzzle into his pitch black hair that I love and inhale his ‘Levi scent’. It hits my brain at once, filling my lungs, my every nerve, and whole body, making it sing out of pure joy. 

 

He truly smells like home. And I grin happily at that thought. 

 

His body twitches shortly as he wakes up and his state of total relaxation fades a bit. Not completely, but still enough for me to sense. 

 

Yesterday it was exactly the same, him lying there all at ease and suddenly clenching up slightly, only unwinding a bit again as he had noticed me next to him. 

 

Today it is the same, only less hesitant than it has been the day before. His body eagerly scoots back to nestle even closer to my chest, to deepen my embrace, and even though I do not hear it, I nonetheless feel a silent sigh escaping him. 

 

His hand reaches out to link my fingers on his chest with his, squeezing them and interweaving our legs even more too, pressing my hand against his slowly beating heart. 

 

Two weeks ago Armin mentioned I was in this so deep. That doesn’t even come close to my emotions right now. I feel nothing but tenderness for this man in my arms. Yeah, greediness and want too, but they all have their origin in that first thought. 

 

Even if he gets cranky I absolutely adore him. Maybe because I’ve come to know it is a bit of his grumpy facade that he built around him to hide and protect his good, caring heart. I’ve seen that before. Ymir and Jean are perfect prime examples of this, too. They only cope with it a little bit differently.

 

But yes. Even in his grimness, he is irresistible to me. Compelling. Seductive. Maybe because his wonderful grey eyes just look at me in that special kind of way that makes me want to swoon like a spinster in distress. As if this was right out of a Jane Austen work. He would yell _“Where’s the smelling salt?”_ , rage like a madman, not leaving my unconscious self, and piss everybody off until he gets exactly what he wants. And then rescue me from my awful, sad little life in the end… 

 

I suppress an amused snort. That’s so typically me. Having my dream in my arms and still going on fantasizing. I force myself out of these thoughts. Reality is so much better anyway.

 

“Good morning,” I whisper into his ear, pecking a kiss on his neck and squeezing his fingers now in return. 

 

“Mhh,” he hums calmly in response, and I feel the sound vibrating through me.

 

“Do you always wake up like this? Lizzy and you, I mean.”

 

“Yes, she always sneaks up at night. Never feel her coming.”

 

“That’s sweet. I hate sleeping alone.”

 

“Mh. Me too.” 

 

I hug him, deeply inhale once more, and kiss his neck. “I’m glad.”

 

Before things can become too sentimental I decide to do something nice, and poke his sexy arse with a small push of my hips. 

 

The effect sets in immediately. He groans with a deep, low sound, lets go of my hand to turn around, and faces me with a wicked gaze in in eyes. 

 

“Hi.” I grin back at him with a wink. “What do you think? Will we be disturbed again today or might we actually have the chance to fi–”

 

His kiss interrupts my question. He is gentle this time, carefully letting his lips trail over mine, and as his hand reaches over to run trough my hair, and nestles in at the back of my head, I sigh. 

 

He hums again in approval and rolls me over, himself on top of me, and I feel his arousal against mine, right before his tongue slips into my mouth to slowly drive me crazy. 

 

After the hasty and very greedy sex last night, we take our time now. I want to get to know him, touch every inch of him. Taste him. Everywhere. I want to leave my imprint on him and need to feel his on me as well. 

 

Well, I guess, as I feel his fingers tracing delicate lines on my bruise-covered neck again I might have a few marks on me already. I still want more. 

 

He breaks off our kiss to peel himself out of his shirt, and me out of mine, and then he just looks at me. I let him, and do the same with him. I reach out my hands to let them trail over his broad shoulders, what I wanted to do since I set my eyes on him on the first day we met, and move on to his shoulder blades and back again to his chest.

 

His muscles flex under my touch, hard against my curious fingers, and alluringly warm from sleep.

 

I feel his eyes curiously observe my reactions and look back at him now, my hands still moving, touching, caressing him. I let them slip upwards again to rest them in his hair now and pull him closer again. I need to taste him so badly. 

 

My lips brush over his strong jawline, covered in a slight stubble, and its rough scratching along with his scent lulls me in. My mind goes muzzy. _More!_

 

I peck my way back to his mouth and he already awaits me, kissing me back, his hot tongue instantly stroking against mine in a slow, hot movement, and I can not withhold a satisfied gasp. I force myself to take it slow so I can lick him thoroughly but he gradually takes over control now, letting his kisses become more fiercely. More needy. Our breathing is heavy already, and he still doesn’t stop. He nibbles at my lips again, biting them almost painfully, then tenderly licking over them once more in apology. I want to burst into flames. 

 

My hands still are in his hair, gripping it, fisting it, and relaxing from time to time to massage his scalp, exploring his soft short stubbles on the back of his head, and his silky hair that flows around his face. 

 

His tongue is back in my mouth now, playing with me, its tip fluttering against mine, and it feels so overwhelming that I let my hands hold on to his waistline now to pull him even closer. I want to feel all of him. Everything.

 

“Mhh. Eren!” He coos into my mouth, interrupting our kiss. How does he stay so composed?

 

And now its his turn to let his lips brush over my face. Over my chin, my jaw, my cheeks and down my throat, his fingers stimulating my neck again to cover me in goosebumps. 

 

“Ahhh.” Fuck _._ This is starting to get out of control again. 

 

“I’m so happy I discovered your sweet spot so quickly,” he purrs now and lets his groin grind against mine. 

 

“Mmmh…”

 

“Hm? Did you say something, Eren?” He begins to tardily lick my neck now. His tongue caressing my skin in lazy, curious strokes to find just the right pace, just the right pressure, just the right nerve.

 

_Not again. But yes, please!_ And why does my mind always go blank when he does that? 

 

“Hmpf…!” Great! I’m back to toddler slang again. 

 

“You know, you really shouldn’t mumble, because I can’t understand a word you’re saying.” His voice is dripping smugness. 

 

Bloody bastard! He can perfectly quote Willy Wonka on me right now and all I am able to do is lying here with only a few incoherent letters swirling around in my head. It’s so arousing that I feel like bursting.

 

I violently try to come up with something. I want him to stop. I need him to continue. Everything at once. I crave for him. I need him. And I don’t want it slow anymore! I almost can’t stand it any longer. Feeling his tongue, constantly teasing me in wet and hot movements, is driving me out of my mind even more. 

 

“Mhh… mmmore!” I finally manage. Frustration seems to help with words. At least a bit. 

 

Another targeted lick from my collarbone all the way up to the tip of my ear is followed by cool blow over it right afterwards this time. _Holy shit!_ Shots of electricity bolt through me and directly into my cock. 

 

“Levi!”

 

At the next lick my back arches upwards in response and my hips rub against his. Sadly he doesn’t seem to be impressed at all. Instead he just switches the side on my neck, and I know this is going to end ugly. 

 

“Ahhh, yes!” 

 

A greedy hum vibrates though me, where his lips touch me. 

 

“L… Levi…” I whimper now. My whole body is on fire and I long for relief.

 

Pants are a stupid invention. So stupid! Bad! Such a waste of fabric… 

 

“Beg me,” he whispers at my throat. 

 

Oh my god. I’m seeing stars now. “Wh–?”

 

“Beg!” A tender bite into my neck. “Tell me what to do, Eren.”

 

“I… ah!”

 

“Take your time.” He seems to have decided for a favourite spot. He places his mouth right between my ear and the joining of my neck with the shoulders, and strategically begins to suck. His tongue is massaging my skin, his teeth are tenderly scratching over it in pure sinfulness. And hearing the noises he makes with that is almost too much—even before his hand touches the same spot on the other side of my neck. 

 

My febrile mind scrapes together what it can get.

 

“Pants!” Bless the lord for monosyllabic words. “Off. Now!”

 

He smirks but obliges instantly. He rips mine off first, then his, and now he kneels over me again, hungrily staring into my eyes. 

 

And before he can continue with his sucking attack on my throat I reach out for his cock that's eagerly pointing at me. Two can play this game. 

 

“Oh, yes. Eren!” he sighs and I playfully massage his already wet tip. His eyes close in bliss, to open right up again, now dark and determined.

 

I stroke him again, stronger this time, using my whole hand to pump, my thumb circling his head, my gaze still fixed on his. I shortly lick over my sore lips, my other hand on the way to my own, painfully hard erection. My whole body shudders and my eyes close in pleasure as my fingers find their aim. 

 

“Ahhhh…” Let’s see how he likes that!

 

“Shit!” I hear his hiss as he abruptly breaks away for condoms and lube. 

 

As he kneels next to me again his fingers are already slippery, and he reaches out to prepare me. He seems relieved that it goes a little quicker this time and soon my uncontrollable moans echo in the room again. He pulls out his fingers, takes hold on my hips and thrusts into me with a sigh of his own. 

 

I join him and we quickly fall into a desperate rhythm. He bends down to catch my cries with his kisses and as he hits my prostate I scream into his mouth. 

 

“Found it” he pants with a hasty chuckle on my lips, just to hit it again. And once more. Until I come in jerking spasms, shouting his name, and my fingers clinging onto his hair. It only takes him another second to follow me and I look him deep into his grey eyes while he empties himself with a shiver and a relieved sigh, buried inside of me. 

 

I sweep away the strands of hair hanging in front of his eyes and kiss him tenderly with a smile, before we break apart. 

 

“Willy Wonka.” I state, as soon as my breaths come more regular again. “Really?”

 

“It was quite appropriate, don’t you think?” he smirks. “I really did not understand a word you were saying!”

 

“Tch!”

 

“That’s my line! And since you recognised the quote it seems I still have to work on my game.”

 

I playfully pinch his nipples in revenge and earn another laugh for that, just as we hear a knock on the door, followed by the familiar sound of turning keys. 

 

“Perfect timing. How does she do this?” I ask, still grinning. 

 

“It’s her bloody superpower,” he sighs with a short rolling of his eyes. I give him a quick peck and we look for something to clean us up, alongside some sort of clothes before we emerge out of the bedroom to face our most favourite neighbour. 

 

\- - -

 

“Good morning, starshines. The earth says hello!” she greets us with a jolly cheer and we shortly freeze in the doorway. 

 

“Are you sure she has no cameras or microphones installed?” I whisper into his ear. 

 

“I’m beginning to doubt that, too,” his quiet rumble answers. If glares could kill, Hanji would explode right on this spot. She doesn’t, and I cringe again, because he is so fucking hot to me, when he does that. 

 

“Oh, you look so cute together. I hope I didn’t interrupt something. Wow, Eren! That’s a sweet collection of bruises on your neck. Are you alright, sweetie?” Going right for the gold, as it seems. 

 

I just smile at her pleasantly. “Good morning, Hanji. How’s your ear?” 

 

“Fine, thanks so much for asking.” 

 

“That’s great. Sorry for that, by the way. Tea?”

 

“Nah, don’t mind. And yes, that would be splendid. Thanks!” 

 

As I turn to the kitchen to wash my hands and set up some water for our tea Levi builds himself up in front of her. 

 

“Please go bother someone else.”

 

“Nope. What if they steal me away from you? You’re my most favourite Oompa Loompa on this planet and I want it to stay this way.”

 

Is this some kind of creepy female intention, maybe even some weird sort of telepathy between them or does she truly, actually spy on our bedroom? Better check it for bugs, later…

 

“Shut up!”

 

“Love you too.” 

 

He just chunters something in response and makes his way to the bathroom. Lizzy dashes after him; she truly is one of a kind. 

 

I reach for the pot from yesterday and start my search for tea and the matcha supplies. Hanji helps me on my quest. 

 

“Would you like the Assam again? Like yesterday?”

 

“Yes, please,” she hands me the bag.

 

“I hope it doesn’t disturb you? Me being here, I mean.” I  kind of feel like I have to ask her. I’m the one intruding into their obvious morning routine of affectionately squabbling with each other, after all.

 

“Disturb me? Oh, Eren. Not at all. I really am so glad to have you here.” An honest beam shows on her face and makes me ease up. 

 

“Thanks! I’m glad too.” 

 

“You make him happy. I can tell. Even though he really seems to like going all crazy-vampire on you.” She winks now. “Is he a biter? Honestly: Don’t you mind that? Or uh…are you _into_ that?” Obviously she can’t help it.

 

“Hm, lets see…” I squint over-dramatically, as if trying to remember something. “Sorry. I forgot. Must be the age. Or all the food yesterday. Or morning sickness. Take a pick.”

 

“Rather some amazing bed games.”

 

“Hanji?” I smile at her.

 

“Eren…?” She leers, reminding me of a terrifying joyful professor Trelawny on drugs.

 

“None of your business.”

 

“Damn,” she grins back. “But well, it was worth a try.”

 

I can’t help but mumble a quiet “definitely,” and she fondly punches my shoulder with a happy snort.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> (A few quotes Charlie and the Chocolate Factory.)


	18. Chapter 18

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A morning with Hanji.

When I walk back into my kitchen I spot Hanji bowing over a freshly brewed pot of tea and Eren whisking up a bowl of matcha. They seem to be comfortable in each other’s company and I relax at that sight.

 

Hanji would never scare him out of his mind on purpose, but sometimes she just can not help herself and takes it one step too far. One big worry drops off my chest as I watch them, talking about Christmas.

 

“So you were all alone yesterday?” Eren asks, candid worry in his voice.

 

“Don’t mind! Really. I’m old, used to it, and wanted you two to enjoy your private time.” 

 

“Thanks Hanji,” I say. I honestly mean it, and she knows. Christmas usually is our time together, having no real family except ourselves. She plays it down, and I am grateful for that, but she actually must have felt at least a little bit lonely all day. 

 

Eren seems to sense this and looks at me with a raised eyebrow, as if to ask for approval. His hair is in its adorable morning tousle, even more ruffled by me earlier, the wide sleeping shirt presenting his delicious neck with my marks on it, his slender figure leaning against my kitchen counter as if he would belong there. He hands me one of the two matcha portions with a gentle brush of his fingers as our hands touch, and I don’t even mind Hanji’s obnoxious cooing as I thankfully peck his lips. 

 

I give him an encouraging nod with a shrug of my shoulders, and a smile.

 

Eren turns to Hanji again. “Why don’t you join us today? Reading or something? I also got some DVDs for Christmas we could watch on the telly, if you’d like.” 

 

“You truly wouldn’t mind?”

 

“Not at all.”

 

He handed me his matcha bowl, I suddenly realise as I look at the unfamiliar cup in my hands. He must have brought it with him yesterday. I take a thankful sip and feel the tea do its magic instantly. Why does my stupid old heart make a jump at that thought that it’s his bowl? So silly.

 

“Thank you, Eren.”

 

“You’re welcome, Hanji. Glad to have you here.” 

 

She beams at him. 

 

We enjoy a pleasant morning silence, Eren going back to the couch and the Rothfuss novella from yesterday, me just staying in the kitchen for a while to finish my matcha, and waiting for daily awareness to fill my body. 

 

Hanji is exceptionally quiet too, sitting next to Eren on the sofa and reading something as well. I think it is the book that Armin gave to Eren for Christmas. I see her face lighten up in delight from time to time, as if she read a joke, and soon she starts a conversation with Eren about it.

 

She really must be glad to be here with us. I feel a small remorse plucking on my nerves. I shouldn’t have left her completely alone all day, yesterday. It was selfish. I even pushed her out of the door. So I try to do a little bit of amends for once and search the fridge for some food. She is always hungry and never picky. I’m a little hungry myself, despite my usual loathing against food before noon… sex seems to do that to you, I guess. And the one this morning was outstanding. I don’t know how he can drive me crazy like that, but he does it somehow. And I love it. 

 

Soon two pans are on my stove, filled with a couple of fried eggs, bacon, mushrooms, sausages—real English bangers, not an unworthy substitute—, a small pot with baked beans next to it, and a tray with hash browns in the oven. I've just put some bread in the toaster to roast as two strong, familiar arms wrap around my waist to embrace me. 

 

“It smells so lovely. May I help with anything?”

 

“Getting out plates?” I smile up at him, the look in his eyes warming my heart.

 

“Sure. I’m hungry like a hunter.”

 

He sets the table, adding some glasses and orange juice, and helps me carrying the dishes, while Hanji puts out a bit of cat food for Lizzy.

 

We dig in and Hanji scares Eren with her power eating. She manages to cram one whole fried egg into her mouth at once, accompanied by a big chunk of sausage, and mushrooms, and already reaches out for a big spoon full of baked beans along half a hash brown, as Eren suddenly bubbles over with stunned laughter after gaping at her for a minute. 

 

She looks up at him, grinning but not stopping in her movements, and makes him laugh even more with that. 

 

“Yup,” I say, before he can ask. “That’s our Hanji. She is either forgetting to eat at all and almost seriously starving on me. Or she’s doing this.” I point my fork at her with a circling movement, framing the whole Hanji picture. “I think that’s one of the reasons why Lizzy adores her so much. Some day they will join forces to eat me out of house and home.”

 

We both turn around to look at the Tasmanian Devil, formerly known as ‘domestic cat’, in front of the feeding dish, then back to my best friend. The resemblance is quite remarkable. Only that Hanji can actually grin and Lizzy is louder. She smacks and gulps until her dish is empty and her squeaky greed-driven hiccup starts. 

 

Hm. I seem to fall for just one type of character as it seems… 

 

Lizzy smacks a couple of times more and finally makes her lazy and hiccup-shaken way to the couch to start her cleaning routine, lies down, and eyes us eating gross things that humans supposedly like to eat, from afar. 

 

None of us is surprised when Hanji finishes breakfast first. Today she even is so kind as to bring her empty plate into the kitchen and store it in the, by now very full, dish washer. I remind myself to switch it on later. 

 

She definitely must have longed for some company if she even condescends to tidy up after her on her own.

 

I reach out for Eren’s hand on the table and squeeze it shortly. “You really don’t mind if Hanji stays? She would be happy if she could spent time with us.”

 

“Of course she can stay.”

 

“Thank you. Hanji?” I call.

 

“Yes, old gnome?” I’m glad that she starts to tease me again. Things were getting really odd here. 

 

“Eren got some Dexter seasons from Mikasa for Christmas. We would have to start at the beginning, since he doesn’t know them, but would you like t–?”

  
  
“Hell, yeah!” she grins happily and lets us finish with our food first before she moves back to the couch again, eager for a comfy day in company.

 

She also goes back to her embarrassing mentions and nosy questions soon, but strangely they aren’t that pushy any more. I wonder if Eren said something to her that I missed. He almost certainly has. 

 

I’m surprised how well he can handle her. Usually Hanji freaks people out, when they meet her for the first time. I think about the last time I brought someone over and have to suppress an angry shudder when the memory flashes back at me. I quickly push that thought away and bury it deep inside of my brain. 

 

With Eren everything is just different. He doesn’t only restrain her peeping on us in a very perfect kind of way—I chuckle shortly as I remember his door knocking yesterday—he actually seems to… _like her_? I won’t question it, even though I can’t help to be a little impressed.

 

I am happy about the fact that those two seem to get along so well so quickly. 

 

After clearing away all the dishes Eren decides to take a shower too before hitting the couch again, and I tidy up my own cooking mess while Hanji watches me from a few feet away. 

 

“Look at you.” She smirks. “All happy, sweet, and kind, like a doting hubby. You only need an apron to make it into a tacky cliché. Maybe a red one with cute white polka dots, ribbons and a brooch? A bunny perhaps. Maybe a bonnet even? We could start with a napkin on your head.”

 

And she’s back! I am more than curious now what on earth he could have told her to make her this tame in front of him.

 

“Usually your smiling face scares the freaking hell out of me, but I have to admit that this is actually nice for a change.”

 

“Shut up!”

 

“You know, I won’t, Pooh Bear.”

 

“Tch.”

 

“He does you good.”

 

“I know.”

 

A small loud silence makes sirens in my head blurt out load. It feels peculiar, almost overwhelmingly happy. Oh, dear! I know this silence. 

 

DANGER! 

 

I throw away the dish towel. 

 

“Don’t you fucking dare crying on me, Hanji! You know I’ll follow if you start.” I threaten her with every tiny bit of menace I can manage to scrape together and glare up at her with my most psychotic stare. 

 

She sniffles, her eyes already watery. Crap. I hastily turn away from her. And I hear her do the same.

 

“I’m sorry. I’m just so happy for you.” Her voice is all throaty already and muffled behind her hands. Not good.

 

“Hanji…”

 

“Why didn’t you go for it sooner, you fool?”

 

“I don’t know,” I mumble. “I was stupid.”

 

A snort. “Yeah, you were! He’s so perfect for you.”

 

“I know…”

 

Better get it all out now, before I will have to face this situation a second time. 

 

“I think, I truly am in love with him, Hanji.” 

 

An even heavier sniffle with a swallowed “fuck!” reaches my ears, accompanied by a shaken whimper and I desperately try to cling on to distracting thoughts. 

 

Violet Beauregard chewing gum, making her all blow up to a huge blueberry. 

 

Pink, freckled elephants with mustaches in ballerina outfits.  

 

Monty Python’s Fish Flapping Dance. 

 

Hanji in kindergarden, glueing glitter stars under my eyes during slumber party night, because she wanted the dark circles to go away and make me laugh… 

 

This last one helps. 

 

“What should I do Hanji?” I hiss in a hurry, before the waterfall starts. “It doesn’t even scare me anymore. And that’s scaring the crap out of me all over again! It doesn’t make sense. It’s all happening so suddenly!”

 

“What should you do? Don’t tell me, that’s for sure.” 

 

I can literally hear the big fat tears pouring out of her eyes now. 

 

“Oh, fuck, Hanji, come on. Please get a grip. I will not let him see me cry with you about such a thing!” Now I’m sniffling, too. Bloody hell.

 

“I kno-hoho-ow…” 

 

“Stop it!” And after a second: “Help. Please?”

 

“Give him a ring, you moron.”

 

“Stop that bullshit! Something serious, please?”

 

“This is. Rings are very serious!”

 

“You know how I meant it, shitty glasses!” 

 

“A tiara then?”

 

“Hanji!”

 

“Matching towels? His and His?”

 

“I swear to god…”

 

“I’m just trying to make the tears go away, you arse.”

 

“I know. It worked for me. Happy?”

 

“Very. I’m still in the hazard zone, though.” 

 

“You’d better hurry, Hanji. He will be out here any minute again, and I will not let this happen. Not on fucking Boxing Day. Not today. He’ll freak out. Or I will. Or both. Definitely both. So suck it up, will you? This is not a drill. Stop it. Now!”

 

My rambling finally seems to calm her down. I see her shoulders come to a rest, the back of her head nodding in silent approval, and I reach out for my tea towel again so she can swipe away her tears before facing me again. 

 

“There you go.” I pat her shoulder. “Thanks. I would have killed you.”

 

“I’m sorry.”

 

“Nah. Don’t worry.”

 

She turns around now, her eyes still a little too red and puffy for my taste, but at least dry, and I take her into my arms so she can calm down again. 

 

To distract me from tearing up nevertheless she deepens her voice. “Just tell him, you know?” I chuckle and she switches back to normal. “Maybe he knows already anyway. You’re glowing from your peel, old man, you know that?”

 

I sigh. 

 

“Or you could go all Darth Vader on him and tell him dramatically that you’re his father and he would go ‘nooo!’ and you’d have a laugh, and maybe sweet a vampire shag afterwards–”

 

I hit her on her head and she laughs. The danger is over at least and maybe she’s got a point. She usually has. 

 

My arms hug her once more before we pull apart again, determined to avoid eye contact for one more minute or so. Just to be safe. 

 

And soon after that Eren is back from showering, his hair still wet and untidy, Lizzy following him on his foot. 

 

“She watched again.” He sounds amused. 

 

“She still does that?” Hanji asks me and turns to Lizzy. “Go, girl! I’m so proud of you. Take a good peek! And tell me everything you see in there. I’ll give you tuna. You know tuna, right? Mhhhhh! Yummy fishy-fish!”

 

I aim a kick at her. 

 

“I feel so used now.” Eren giggles. 

 

“Yeah.” Hanji smirks at him. “I’m only here for your body. Sorry.”

 

“Well. You won’t get it. The monopole for touching belongs to this guy.” He casually nods in my direction.

 

“Damn. There is a monopole for that?”

 

“Yes,” we both agree in unison. 

 

“No chance? Not even a teeny-tiny–”

 

“Nope.” He turns to me. “Ready for the couch, grandpa? We might have to snuggle up though to make some room for that delightful neighbour of ours.”

 

“I exist to please.” I grin back as Hanji sighs in bravado and go to fetch the DVDs. ****

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As for the references in this one: Violet Beauregard is from Charlie and the Chocolate Factory again. The [Fish Flapping Dance](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lefP0_ZM-Lw) is really something. If you ever feel down, watch it.


	19. Chapter 19

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Spending time with Hanji on Boxing Day.

Spending the day on the couch, watching TV is strangely homely. I’ve watched ‘Dexter’ with Hanji before, all first twelve episodes in one day, so it feels like a kind of distorted deja-vu. 

 

With Eren laying snuggled up to me ‘to make space for Hanji’ on the sofa, it is some kind of dream I never want to end. Thank god this is a bank holiday and tomorrow is Sunday; 24 more hours with having him around all day long.

 

Eren loves Dexter. It takes him one or two episodes and he is hooked. He has a strange admiration for Debra, and feeling him chuckle in my arms makes me happy beyond comparison. Every now and then he looks at me, the blueish green of his eyes sparkling, and kisses me gently. After one whole episode of withholding I just can’t take it any longer and let my hand trail under the blanket that covers us, and under his shirt to caress his chest and waist. I just need to touch him. Have him close. Feel him. Even if it is only to reassure my mind and heart that he is real. 

 

In the middle of season one we make a short break to hunt for food in my kitchen. Merely seeing the intro for five times now has left us feel peckish again, and the very hungry caterpillar among us has been starting to bite her nails as a substitute after going through two yoghurts, a banana, and an apple. 

 

Luckily I packed the fridge and pantry for Christmas. I was preparing for having Hanji here all the time, so it was like shopping for a very greedy, human-sized hamster. 

 

“Okay people.” I sigh after a quick look through my supplies. What would you like? Pasta? Meat? Fish? Warm? Cold? Any suggestions?

 

“Pizza?” Hanji asks. 

 

I glare at her in response. “You’re very well aware of the fact that my pizza takes three days to make, Hanji. Don’t you know me at all? Haven’t me met? And no, I won’t settle for take away. It’s bloody Christmas. I miss cooking after all that take away. I need it. Also we’ve got a whole kitchen filled with food. So come on, hit me with something else.”

 

“Burgers?”

 

“Nice. But not helping. Making bread buns, brining the beef I’d have to defrost first… No time for that. For tomorrow, maybe.” 

 

“You’re such a food snob.”

 

“And you’re such a cry baby.”  


 

“How dare you going there…!” 

 

“Sorry.” I grind my teeth in apology. She sounds cheerful but she _has_ got a point. Again.

 

“Three days?” Eren intervenes. “What kind of pizza _is_ that? And what about the burgers?”

 

“Perfect, those burgers,” Hanji answers. “Like ‘I wanna eat and freaking die afterwards’ perfect. And he makes a 72 hours dough for his pizza, that nerd. I have to admit, it is amazing, though. You should make it for him some time, mister grumpy face.”

 

“Tch. It’s ‘geek’. Not ‘nerd’. I thought we cleared that up after our last debate and excessive googling about this. And still: not helping.”

 

“…”

 

“…”

 

“Sushi?”

 

“We’ve been having Sushi almost every day for the last two weeks, Hanji. I have no fresh fish, it would take hours to make it well, and again: No take away!”

 

“Damn it, I’m so curious about that pizza and burgers now that I can’t think about anything else.”

 

Yes! Please let me cook for you. Just stay. Let me bribe you with food! “We could prepare the pizza dough today, if you would want to. And I’ll make burgers tomorrow. But that still wouldn’t feed us now.”

 

“We could? Yes please!”

 

“You’ll be here on Tuesday evening?”

 

“Of course. If you let me.”

 

I shoot a glare at him. Having him here is all that I want. If I had it may way I’d actually make sure he would stay for good. “Are you kidding me?” 

 

He grins back.

 

“Eren and Levi, sitting in a tree, K-I-S-S–I–” 

 

“Shut up, Hanji!”

 

“Come on, boys, I’m starving!”

 

“You always are!”

 

Silence. 

 

I sigh in defeat. “You two are the worst kitchen assistants ever.”

 

“Yeah, yeah. What would we do without you, bitching about our ideas?”  


 

“Some soup perhaps?” Eren suggests now. “I’m cold without the blanket.” God, he is adorable!

 

“Hm. I could make a whole pot and our Miss Creosote here could eat out of that all day if she promises not to spill it onto the couch.” I search my mind for recipes and needed ingredients comparing it to the stuff I know I have here. “Okay, let’s see. Hanji? Hand me the pumpkin. We’re going in.” 

 

As always, making the first cut on the bloody pumpkin is an awful pain in the arse. I’ve got good kitchen knives—really good ones and I make sure they are always sharp as fuck. It’ a perfect Japanese set and I value every single piece of it. But the pumpkin just is some bastard of it’s own. 

 

Hanji giggles like a maniac, holding her side with one arm, pointing at me with the other, as I grip the knife with the pumpkin stuck around the blade, hitting it onto the kitchen counter. She fumbles out her phone to make a snapshot, and mutters something that sounds like “shi nobu”. I have no fucking idea what that is or why it makes her crack up like this, but it is Hanji in her crazy mode, so I don’t really ask. Some things better stay left unknown…

 

Finally the pumpkin lies in front of me in two halves and we go to work. I let Eren scrape out the seeds and cut it in chunks, while I peel and chop some onions to sizzle them in oil. In go the pumpkin chunks, a cored apple, a few carrots (also in chunks), a proper amount of homemade chicken stock I had been hoarding in my freezer, a little bit of turmeric, garam masala, and salt, and we already are ready to clean up after us, letting the pot on the stove do the rest of the cooking. 

 

Revision: _I_ clean up and Eren helps me with it. Hanji just stands next to us and nicely tells us, when we miss a spot. What a lunatic!

 

The Indian spices quickly fill the flat with their wonderful warming flavour and make us smile in anticipation. 

 

“Would you like bread? Hanji? Eren?”

 

“Yes please.”

 

“You know my answer to that, mister. Haven’t we met?” 

 

I ignore her retort, search the freezer for some bread and preheat the oven. 

 

After a short while the pumpkin is cooked through and we puree the soup. I order Hanji to open a can of coconut milk to serve with it while Eren is setting the table already, get the now crispy and hot bread out of the oven, and we are ready to eat. 

 

Hanji inhales three big bowls alongside almost one whole ciabatta while Eren and I finish our first serving and share a second loaf of bread. 

 

“You know, Hanji?” Eren says eventually, “I’ve got a friend who eats exactly like you. You should meet her some day.”

 

“Oh no! Are you telling me there’s actually _two_ of them?” I groan.

 

“Yup.” He grins. “Sasha. Connie marks every day in the calendar when she actually stops eating out of automotive. I think that happens once every two months or so.”

 

“I like her already.” Hanji mumbles, her mouth full with bread and soup and helps herself to a fourth bowl.

 

\- - - 

 

After eating Eren helps me to clear out the dishwasher and I show him how to make the pizza dough. In the meantime Hanji sits next to Lizzy on the floor, playing some unfair version of tug of war with her with a ribbon she somehow managed to find somewhere. 

 

Eren stands next to me and watches attentively as I mix wheat flour, water, olive oil, salt, honey, and yeast into a viscous, sticky dough, just to leave in a big enough, airtight container and put it in the the fridge. 

 

“That’s it?” he asks in astonished disbelief. 

 

“That’s it.” The wondering look on his features makes my need to touch him almost unbearable. 

 

“No magic? No, I don’t know, secret ingredient? No praying to the gods, the old ones and new? No dancing naked under a full moon?”

 

“No. Just time.” My hand slips under his shirt and around his warm waist to pull him into a hug. That’s better now. Close.

 

“Can’t wait for Tuesday,” he smiles happily.

 

“It’s a date then.” I let my fingers trail over the small of his back. 

 

“Is it? I was planning on being here anyway, you know?” He lowers his lips, blushing sweetly.

 

“Let’s just call it one.”  


 

“As you wi–”

 

“Oi! Boys?” A cheerful voice comes from the living room and makes us break apart. Oh, right. Hanji. She is still here. I almost forgot. “I hate to interrupt you.”

 

“What?” I snap at her. 

 

“Well. First, it’s getting way too hot in here with you two lovebirds flirting like maniacs, and all the hormones flowing around in here make me feel gross, and female, and I hate myself.” She winks at us with a beaming grin. She isn’t really mad. “And second: I’ll be hungry on Tuesday too, you know?” She points at her belly now, pouting and blinking excessively. 

 

I sigh. “Yeah, I’m aware of that. I doubled the ingredients, you moocher.” I turn to Eren. “Is that ok?” 

 

“Of course. You don’t have to ask for that!”

 

I hug him shortly to thank him and after preparing another big pot of tea, we make ourselves comfortable on the couch again. Hanji stays on the floor, keeping on winning her tug of war with Lizzy for a while and then just crawling her fur as she rolls herself up into slumber on her lap. 

 

Having all the room on the sofa for ourselves Eren and I fully lie down now and once more I just can not keep my hands to myself. Neither can he apparently. Sadly my back is pressed to his chest again, so I only can reach his leg and arm that is wrapped around me. But it might be safer this way, I definitely am a little bit too will-less to stay away from his gorgeous neck if it was presented right in front of me. As it turns out that captivating thing is a very nice spot for the both of us.

 

So I just let him hug me and let his fingers do the exploring for now. Luckily I’ve seen Dexter before. Even though it is still very good and fun to watch, I’d rather pay attention to his fingers on my chest now, caressing me so lightly and tenderly that I almost can’t feel it, and then brushing over my skin more bravely from time to time. Sometimes he stops for a pause to let his hand rest above my heart for a moment before it trails off again to continue its quest.

 

It feels so good, so cosy, so secure, that I find myself doing something I haven’t done since Hanji and I were kids. I let complete happiness overwhelm me and doze off in someone else’s arms. 


	20. Chapter 20

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Burger time.

Watching Levi cook is breathtaking. I t is Sunday and as promised he is making burgers. And I only stare at him the whole time during that process. I offered my help but apparently there is not that much left for me to do. 

 

And soI just observe. It is too compelling for me to properly concentrate on something else anyway.

 

In the morning he had cut the beef he put out of the freezer and into the fridge last night, to mix one part of it with salt and the other one with an almost disgusting looking brown paste. The devil knows why. I surely can’t tell. 

 

While he just stored it all in the fridge again I tried to ask Hanji, whose eyes had become dreamy whilst watching him, too, but she just unknowingly shook her head in defeat, and made her way back downstairs to her place, taking the tea pot and a big glass of yoghurt along some fruit with her. 

 

Before the door closed behind her she mentioned something about not being able to deal with a ravishing cooking monster so early in the day and wishing us ‘a nice lovey-dovey morning’ for ourselves.

 

Today we have been woken up by her entering which ended in Levi making a koi cha for the both of us; the real strong kind of matcha that you usually get brewed in a tea ceremony and that gets infused a second time after drinking the first round because of the huge amount of tea powder that even settles on the bottom of the bowl. 

 

After Hanji’s leave he starts to make the burger buns. I don’t see why exactly he makes them on his own when you easily could buy them just as well and apparently save a lot of time with that additionally. 

 

He first warms something, milk with some other ingredients I guess, on the stove, puts some yeast into it and lets it sit for a while, which we spent with cooking another pot of tea. A herbal infusion, since—even if it actually is an evening mix—after the koi cha a black tea would have been too intense to deal with. Afterwards he mixes the fluid with eggs, flour, butter and some other stuff and lets it rest once more. 

 

Yeah… I might observe his movements more than the process itself. 

 

A while later he kneads the dough again and I feel my body heat up as I watch his strong arms and hands work. His muscles flex under his shirt, his shoulder blades rotate seductively, his whole body moves with them, and the whole picture makes my mind go fuzzy.

 

I am utterly endeared by the immersed, concentrated, and caring look in his eyes. It is hypnotising as hell and I almost choke on my infusion, as he shoots a quick glance at me. 

 

After another while of waiting and reading—by now I have finished the novella and moved on to the Princess Bride…it is even more hilarious than the film—he forms the bread rolls. 

 

Once they are baked, perfectly sprinkled with some sesame, and looking golden as the most perfect thing in the world, the smell in the whole flat is overwhelmingly delicious. 

 

I walk over and eye the buns in awe. As my fingers reach out to carefully poke at one of them I suddenly feel his hand on my wrist to stop them. 

 

“Don’t,” he tells me with a teasing undertone. “Why would you make them all dented and filthy? We want to eat them later.”

 

Why do I get aroused by this so easily? 

 

“My hands aren’t dirty. And there’s eight of them. I can count, you know?”

 

“Well, we’ve got a Hanji to feed.”

 

We have indeed. And maybe even those eight burgers-to-be might be a bit of a short supply. 

 

Nonetheless I pout excessively and blink down at him, hoping to at least almost achieve the precious puppy dog eyes that Marco can pull off if he wants something from Jean. “But I am curious. They look so soft, and round, and perfect. See?” I point at the baked good in front of us with my other hand. “And they smell so very, very nice.”

 

“Mhh.” Levi steps closer now, a smirk forming on his lips. “Did you just say you like my buns?”

 

I grin back “Ah, such a bad American word. Your British is so much better. Imagine the shock you gave me when I heard you talk with it for the first time.”

 

“Hmm. How good to know.” His voice is deep and smooth now, trying to enhance his London accent and it seems to caress me everywhere. “But did you?”

 

“I believe you even have it written somewhere in black on white. Or rather in blue ink behind a bird.” Thinking back about writing that card on a late evening along with the other Christmas greetings for our shop’s regulars and friends, feels a little surreal now. Usually I just do things, without hesitation, even if others tell me that I am completely stupid. But this had been different. I started to write out of an amused impulse but nonetheless feared it would be a bad idea. However, I simply had to try. I had do to something. Anything. And once that it was done, handing him the envelope was a very easy and almost overwhelmingly thrilling thing to do.

 

“I was so happy, when I read it. Hanji even took a photo. I bet she’ll show it to you soon.”

 

“Looking forward to it. And good. I was worried that I had given you a heart attack with that.”

 

“You almost did. It was wonderful.”

 

“You like getting heart attacks? We could arrange that.”

 

“I like getting Christmas cards from you.”

 

“Splendid. I’ll give you another one next year. I also do birthday cards if you’re interested.”

 

“Eren?” 

 

I look into his eyes that burn their gaze into mine right now. “Yes?”

 

“It was perfect. Thank you.” 

 

He slightly lifts his head to kiss me and my hands instantly wrap around his waist. Before his tongue can ask for permission I open my mouth to deepen our kiss and let him in, wrapping my tongue around his, while he is pressing his whole body against me. 

 

I notice my feet stumbling, apparently I’m being pushed backwards by him again, but more slowly this time. Directed. Until my spine is resting on his fridge once more, where it had already been on our first night. The kiss he is giving me now is so much more intimate. It feels familiar and yet so exciting at the same time. 

 

I moan into his throat, knowing it will drive him crazy and also…I just can’t keep it in any longer. His hands are resting on my waistline first, but now they start moving upwards on my chest until they come to rest on my neck, where they crawl the back of my head, thumbs stroking over my jaw. I shiver and he breaks away to look at me, his grey eyes filled with twinkles. It is as if they were made out of quicksilver. 

 

I clear my voice, hoping it will clear my mind too. At least a bit. One can hope, right? “Ahem. So…how did we get here? I just was praising your food as I recall? Or was it your sweet and sexy buttocks?”

 

“You so were complimenting my arse.” He smirks cunningly.

 

“Hm. Let’s see then.” My hands move to the topic of our discussion and squeeze it in examination. “Oh! It really is nice. So perky. You truly are Batman, huh?”

 

“I’m so flattered right now. Please, go on.”

 

Impulse rushes through me once again, so I bend down once more and whisper into his ear. “I want to do such naughty things to you. You look so very sexy, when you cook.”

 

As always he doesn’t lose his composure. But I catch the hungry glow in his eyes.

 

“Wait until I mince the meat,” he rumbles. 

 

Shit. I should have known he would just love to take over control again. 

 

“It will be messy! And then,” he closes the small gap between us once again “I will use my hands to make patties. Delicious…” he lets his palms rest on my chest and his mouth is back right next to my ear now. My whole neck is tingling, waiting for him to lick it. Longing for his touch. But he stays away.

 

Oh-oh! 

 

“…juicy,…” his morning stubbles scratches over my skin.

 

Mh! 

 

“…tender meatballs. And they will be so very tasty that you will want to fuck me so badly. All night. Long!” 

 

“Splendid.” Amazing. A real word! I’m getting better at this.

 

His scent is overwhelming me, even over all of the lovely flavour of freshly baked bread in the kitchen. My morning wood, never really gone in the first place, is back and throbbingly begging for some action. My heart is racing and my hands can just fist his shirt in delight. 

 

“I could give you an appetizer, if you ask nicely…”

 

And now he is back to his bite-sucking, finally releasing me from the begging prickle on my nerves. 

 

“Ahh!”

 

We’re still standing in his kitchen, my back to the fridge, his hands on my shoulders. His mouth is teasing my neck and I love it. I almost hate myself for being that sensitive there, at such an easily accessible spot, but screw it! I want—need!—him to continue. I want to feel him to satisfy this urge. I want his fingers on my cock, or at least mine of his, and feel him everywhere…

 

“Do you remember our ‘naked Holiday’ plan?” I gasp as soon as he lets me catch my breath for a moment and my mind can finally come up with new words.

 

“Yes.”

 

“Well, the kids are out of the house right now and I could scream some nice things into your ear when you screw me…” 

 

“Let’s do it!”

 

\- - - 

 

A while later we lie on the bed, totally exhausted and my voice is hoarse. 

 

How am I supposed to co-run a shop in the next morning? My vocal chords are worn out and my whole neck and shoulders are covered in his love bites and bruises. I can’t even look into a mirror without getting aroused by the mere memory. 

 

Well, I think I’ll let future me deal with that problem.

 

My mind suddenly flashes back to one year ago. It had been one of the emotionally worst Christmases in my life. I had been sitting in the cosy kitchen of our parents, together with Mikasa and Armin— four of my most dearest people in the world around me—, having a lovely meal Mum had cooked for us with Armin’s help. Nice times and everything. And I just couldn’t get myself to enjoy it. Something had been missing. I had never felt so alone, so strangely incomplete. To know that I had been longing for someone for over a year and being worried about the fact that this might never become something real.

 

And now we lay here. Covered in each other’s mess, panting heavily, grinning at each other, and holding hands like kids because letting go is the last thing on our mind right now. 

 

“What a nice appetizer.” I caw. Yup, that voice is gone for now!

 

“Well, you asked for it in a very endearing way.”

 

“I have to remember that trick.” I stand up to wipe us clean. 

 

“And I have to remember to make you watch me cook if this will happen all the time.”

 

“Chances are good.”

 

“Mhh.”

 

“I like naked Holidays.”

 

“Me too. We should do that more often.”

 

“Count me in.”

 

“Our cookie monster will be back soon however.”

 

I grin. “What a relief! Who else should eat all the burger buns I wasn’t even allowed to poke at? Honestly though. Won’t they get squished anyway when we fill them?” 

 

“They will.” He smirks. “But the opportunity to irritate you was just too tempting. You have been staring at my arse all morning long. Very distracting if you haven’t noticed. It had to go away.”

 

“Does that mean I am allowed to touch your buns now?” 

 

“Is that a thing of yours?” He chuckles. “Groping bread? Harassing older men? Should I be worried or something? Maybe it’s a serious illness. Are you a pervert, Eren?”

 

“The first thing not yet. But you never know. And for the other thing? I just can’t help it as it seems.” I reach out and poke his belly button, only to cheer in playful surprise “Oh, look! We've both got a finger in your stomach. How did that happen?”

 

“Tch. I’m really just some hot piece of meat to you, huh?”

 

“Isn’t that the dream?”

 

“Are you always such a clown?”  


 

“Do you always answer questions with other questions to avoid an actual answer?”

 

“Tch.” 

 

“Mhh. Sexy! Come on, grandpa. Let’s get dressed. I really want to examine your gorgeous bread.”

 

– – – 

 

As soon as Levi has minced the meat to form patties and begins to fry some cucumbers slices that I cut for him in a pan, apparently for some quick-pickled gherkins, we hear the familiar sound of keys in our door. No knock this time. 

 

“It’s like she is a bloodhound when it comes to food,” he sighs. 

 

“Hello boys,” Hanji chirps from the entrance and walks over to hand me the (now empty) tea pot with a thankful smile. “Did you have fun without me?”

 

“No. We were weeping because you were gone and didn’t know what to do with our sad, little, empty lives,” Levi sneers over his shoulder. 

 

“Splendid. When can we eat? I’m starving!”

 

“Honestly, woman. Don’t you have a fridge on your own? And what have you been eating apart from our daily sushi in the last few weeks?”

 

“Air, caffeine? And love from you, your grumpyness.”

 

“Shit, Hanji. How often do I have to tell you to eat at least something? No wonder you’re running up the walls on the weekends, looting my fridge.”

 

“Well. I’m old. I forget things.” She just grins.

 

“Right.”

 

“Don’t you have lunch breaks at work?” I ask.

 

“Of course, she has.” Levi’s voice calls out to me. “She just forgets to eat during them. Must be her brain not able to stop thinking. She’d probably even stay there overnight if they wouldn’t kick her out of the lab every evening.” 

 

“Lab? What are you doing for work, Hanji?”

 

“I’m a biologist.” 

 

“What kind?”

 

“Brains. Interesting stuff going on in there. Want me to take a look at your’s? I’d have to cut it open though.”

 

“No. But thanks for the offer. So very kind of you to ask.”

 

“Good. He wouldn’t be very happy about it anyway I guess.” She points at Levi.

 

“I would hunt you down,” we hear his rumble.

 

“See?”

 

I grin at her. “Do you have to go back to work tomorrow, too? Or are you on vacation?”

 

“Those idiots made me take vacation,” she sighs in defeat. “So I’ll be free as a bird for the rest of this year.”

 

“That sounds nice.”

 

“Yeah. It may be better this way. I in fact do forget to eat and relax when I’m on a roll. You three are reopening the Tearoom tomorrow, right?”

 

“Yes. And the days after Christmas usually are as busy as the ones before. It’s like people can’t wait to go outside and shop again. Mikasa and Armin will be on back from visiting our parents this evening, so we all can be there. ”

 

That reminds me that I’d better check my phone to see if they have called.

 

Apparently not, but they sent me a picture from Mum and Dad, waving at the camera and smiling happily. I grin at that sight. I really do miss them, but staying here had been the right choice. I’ll visit them another time, maybe even take him with me if he wants to… They would like him.

 

I also got a bunch of other texts from our friends. Christmas wishes and questions about my date as it seems. 

 

**From: Ymir  
i can’t believe you ignored my kind text messages, hated my very adorable ringtones, and made me lose two more bets to your sister. i thought we were friends. i trusted you. **

 

**From: Ymir  
congrats on finally getting some sweet love though, you incredible butt machine. i’m so proud of you. phone five!**

 

I roll my eyes. But I can’t help it and grin as I hit the screen with my palm. Yes, I’m that lame! And I bet Ymir did exactly the same when she sent that text. 

 

**From: Ymir  
** **baby girl sends her lovely greetings too btw.**

 

**From: Marco  
Hi Eren. Merry Christmas. I hope your date went well. See you on Thursday for the party and the annual gift haul. Maybe even a little bit earlier to buy some biscuits. Jean already ate all of those we bought this week.**

 

The gift haul was something that started two years ago when Ymir got so passionate about her Christmas presents, that we talked about it in our store after closing time, telling each other the list of every single gift we got. Last year we did it again on New Year’s Eve in our usual round of friends and called it a tradition from now on.

 

**From: Jean  
** **Just to make things clear: He helped me with the biscuits.**

 

They always text in pairs, even if they are standing next to each other at that moment. It’s sweet somehow.

 

**From: Jean  
Okay… I let him have one piece. Sorry, sweetheart! The next box is yours. **

 

**From: Marco  
(:**

 

**From: Connie  
Christmas is all around us. Have nice Holidays! See you on Thursday, I guess?**

 

**From: Unknown  
Thought you might want my number too. Just in case. See you soon, neighbour.**

 

**From: Unknown  
** **Oh, yes. Hanji here.**

 

I smile at the last two. I already had a feeling she would have saved my number at once she could lay her hands on it. But she is right and I save her’s as well.

 

“Thanks for your messages, Hanji.”

 

“You’re welcome, Eren.”

 

“You texted him? Why?” 

 

“To give him my number of course. Are you jealous?”

 

“Tch.” I can literally hear him rolling his eyes at her.

 

“I sent you a picture as well,” she calls out to me now. “Did you see it?”

 

“Not yet. That wouldn’t be a photo of him looking at my phone number, right?” I look back at my phone.

 

“Damn. You told him already?”  


 

“Of course I did, Hanji.”

 

The photo really is something. It shows Levi, apparently standing in his kitchen with a delighted smile on his face and yes, there’s the card. My heart makes a small jump as I see his happy look.

 

“Thanks, Hanji. Very inappropriate, you really should work on that.” An amused snort comes from the stove. “But thanks.”

 

I have to tell him. 

 

“You’re welcome,” she cackles.

 

I walk over to Levi to hug him from behind. “First,” I mumble into his hear “thanks for the warning. And second: I really did give you a heart attack, huh? I’m sorry for that.”

 

“Tch.” He says it with a grin. 

 

“You know I love it, when you say that, don’t you?”

 

“Tch.”

 

“Mh! I am glad that I have my first photo of you. Maybe I should show you some embarrassing pictures of me too. I’ll ask Mikasa to bring my childhood photo book with her tomorrow.”

 

“You would?”

 

“Yup. I guess, you’ll like it.”

 

“Are you sure it is totally embarrassing? I bet you were a sweet kid.”

 

“Hm. Let’s see… On one I sit at our dining table with only a shirt on, cat whiskers on my face and a toe in my nose. On another one I have a pair of tights on my head and wear the pearl necklace of my Mum, including her red lipstick and my Dad’s glasses. And on the third one I paint a huge penis on a matchstick man. And yes, I have a big happy smile on my face on that one.”

 

“I so want to see that.” 

 

“I thought so.”

 

Hanji clears her throat. Of course she eavesdropped. “May I see them too?”

 

“Well. Do I have a choice?”

 

“No.”

 

“Hey, Hanji?” I cheer. 

 

“Yes?”  


 

“Want to see embarrassing childhood photos of me so you can make fun of me in the future?”

 

“Really? I’d love to.”

 

“Show me some awkward pictures of yours too and its a date for three then.”

 

“Perfect. I’ll be there!”

 

“I’m surrounded by lunatics,” Levi mutters kindly.

 

I kiss him. And we prepare our food.

 

\- - - 

 

Hanji actually only manages to eat three burgers at once. Levi and I eat one each and decide to share a third one just out of pure greed. They really stuff you.

 

“Perfect buns,” I mumble with full mouth and wink at him. He laughs out loud. And hands down. Hanji had been right. They are the best burgers I ever had. Perfect like ‘I want to eat them and almost die right afterwards’ perfect. 

 

He told me the brown stuff earlier had been miso paste. Additionally to the gherkins he fried some bacon and mixed mayonnaise with wasabi for a sauce. Like I said: Another half of a burger just out of pure greed. Yummy! And even if I feel my stomach hurt in agony after the last bite, it has been totally worth it.

 

After dinner Hanji grabs the last two burgers with a greedy glow in her eyes and takes them downstairs with her to make us space for a quiet evening alone before I will have to go to work again tomorrow. It’s a nice gesture and we thank her before Levi stands up to clean the kitchen. 

 

He really does like to clean as it seems. And even though I myself am not quite as enthusiastic about it I like to help him. So I put the plates into the dishwasher and dry the washed up dishes with a towel while he scrubs the kitchen counter until it is back to its usual sparkle. 

 

Afterwards he opens a bottle of wine and we move to the living room, just to fall on the couch with both our stomachs filled with burger.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The [butt machine](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=tHlDfejCHkc). There’s a song and ever since I've read [this](http://www.archiveofourown.org/works/1440358/chapters/3029572?view_adult=true) wonderful fan fiction the Ymir in my head just loves it.
> 
> Connie is quoting Love Actually of course.


	21. Chapter 21

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Snuggling on the couch.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Maybe I should add a trigger warning here. 
> 
> This chapter contains reference to physical violence. It is not actually happening but part of a conversation. I thought you should know to be prepared.

We lie on the sofa, reading, with Lizzy resting right between us and with two glasses of wine on the coffee table as he suddenly puts his book away and starts to massage my feet. 

 

“I ate too much,” he groans with a happy grin. “You cook too good. Where did you learn that anyway?”

 

“Completely self-taught.”

 

“Really? Does the Batman Academy do such a thing?” 

 

I love it how he makes me laugh just like that. The last past years have been so gloomy, even with Hanji next door who does a great job with pulling me out of my sombre thoughts before they can become too sincere. It just is different with him.

 

“Yeah. Mostly just to be able to properly feed Hanji in the beginning. But I found out that I actually loved it, so I never stopped learning more.”

 

“Well that’s nice. How long have you two been knowing each other?”

 

“We met in kindergarden. She tried to make me laugh, I always did my best to keep her out of trouble, and we have been friends ever since. She was a little mess even then. Brilliant mind but not very socially adapt.” I smile at that thought. “When she got a job offer in Trost after university I moved here too to keep an eye on her. We even tried to live together for a while. Didn’t work out however. Being neighbours though is good.” 

 

“It’s nice having family around,” he simply states. And he is right. 

 

“Yes, it is.” I also put away my book and squeeze his foot as well, careful so I hopefully won’t tickle him too much. 

 

Spending time with him, living with him if one could call it like that at this stage, seems an almost too easy thing to do. He’s just been here for the last three days and I've already gotten used to it. Waking up next to each other, sharing my morning matcha ritual with him, and just spending time with him feels so normal. And even though it naturally is different to experience weekends or holidays together than usual daily life with work and maybe even a bad day or two in between I think this could actually work. 

 

I wonder if he feels the same. I wonder if he will just leave tomorrow, he’s usually living with his sister and Armin after all. They sure must miss him when he’s not around. I know I would. I hope he’ll at least visit some times. Hopefully spend the next weekend together as well. And New Year’s Eve… 

 

Maybe I should just ask him if he’d like to stay.

 

“Would you mind me staying here next week, too?” he interrupts my thoughts, so I don’t really get what he says at first.

 

“Pardon?” 

 

“If you wouldn’t mind having me around all the time after work hours and in the mornings I would like to stay here. Would that be okay?”

 

Surprise, relief, and happiness overcome me all at once. He would really like to stay? “Yes, please. I would like that.” 

 

“Great.”  


 

“Won’t your family miss you though?” 

 

“Maybe.” He shrugs his shoulders. “But we will see each other at work all the time and they don’t live far away. I would miss you much more.”

 

Warmth spreads through my body and how is it possible to almost miss him, when he is laying right besides me, massaging my feet, telling me he wants to stay with me. He looks so beautiful. His hair has been a gorgeous mess all day long and I recall noticing the strands over his ears flapping like the wings of a bird when he chewed the burgers. It was so utterly adorable that I had been staring at it the whole time. 

 

His eyes focus on mine and I can not stand it any longer. I let go of his foot, pull mine out of his grip as well and move around on the couch so I can embrace him. Lizzy is not happy about having to move, and lazily jumps off the couch, but she’ll be back in no time.

 

“I would miss you too,” I mumble into his shirt.

 

“You don’t think it all is too fast?”

 

“Tch.” I have my head on his chest and can hear his heartbeat. It sounds so strong. So alive. So wonderfully real. “Well, maybe. But it doesn’t bother me so who cares? I don’t. And being alone sucks.”

 

“It really does, doesn’t it?” He hugs me back and laughs suddenly. I look up at him. “I’m glad.” He smiles at me. 

 

“I’ll cook something nice when you come home from work. You can bring Mikasa and Armin if they’d like to come.” I don’t want to give them the feeling that I want to deprive them of his wonderful company. 

 

“I would love that. Thank you! I’ll ask them.”

 

“Well, Hanji will be here as well so we actually should thank _them_ if they really want to go on the adventure in joining us.” 

 

He chuckles. “She really is one of a kind. I’m happy you have each other.”

 

“Thank you. For accepting her so easily I mean.”

 

“Of course. Why shouldn’t I? I like her.”

 

I want to tell him. So I push away my fear and just go with it. “The last man I tried to date hit her.”

 

He freezes in my arms. “What? How…what happened?”

 

“You know her and her concerned spying on me by now.” I sigh. “I brought him home after dinner and we met her standing in front of her door downstairs. She said something…I don’t even know what it was anymore. Just something cheeky like she always likes to say without really meaning it. She might have been a little too nosy, but still. Just Hanji being Hanji.”

 

I notice his hand is stroking my back now. It feels so good.

 

“He got angry and insulted her. And when she stepped up for herself he beat her. Right into her face.”

 

I sense Eren’s rage. His breathing has changed and the hand that’s not on my back is clenched into a tight fist. I can’t see his face but I bet it is distorted into a scowl. However he lets me talk without interrupting me. He simply listens, holds me, and shows me he cares. I am so grateful for that.

 

“Her glasses broke, she bled like a faucet, and I had to drag her grudging arse to the hospital to get her stitched up. She had a cracked cheekbone, her face had been blue for weeks and she had been awfully quiet for months until she finally was back to her usual self. It scared the hell out of me. We were just lucky she didn’t lose an eye over that.”

 

The memories of that evening overwhelm me once again and I feel pure anger rise up inside of me for that person. Hurt me all you want but hit Hanji just for the gift of her gab and you’ll feel my fury. And fear it for the rest of your life. I’ve never been that mad at someone before in all my life. Well, except for Hanji’s parents who disowned her for not wanting to become a world class pianist and threw her out on the street when we were fourteen. Luckily she had some sort of crazy aunt who took her in that time. I—not really on good terms with my folks either—just made sure to finish school so we could leave all of that behind some day. 

 

There is a reason why we don’t visit home for Christmas. It never has felt that way in the first place. It’s only the country we miss from time to time. And we can go there whenever we like and when there’s no snow, no ice, and no chilly winter storms that creep through the windows.

 

“What an arsehole!” Eren's voice sounds intensely angry and brings me back to the present. I’ve never heard that ring in it before. But his arms are holding me gently. “I’m so sorry Levi, I didn’t know that. Is she alright by now? Is that why she has that small scar under her eye?”

 

“Yes it is. She says her left cheek still itches during heavy weather changes but apart from that everything healed.”

 

“What a relief. What happened to the guy?”

 

“I kicked him right there on the spot. He never saw it coming. Even lost a tooth. Never heard from him again in all these years. Better for him I guess.”

 

“Good. What a prick! I bet you looked hot as hell when your foot hit his face. I wish I could have seen that.” 

 

I snort at that and have to chuckle myself now. He  doesn’t ask if that was why I never asked him out. He doesn’t even ask if I really thought that he would do such a thing, too. He just hugs me and kisses the top of my head. It’s like he already understands. 

 

“If he makes you trouble any time in the future tell me and we will kick this sodding arse together.”

 

“I will. Thanks.”

 

“You’re welcome. And I mean it. No one hurts the people I care about and gets away with it easily.”

 

His hand is in my hair now and massages my head. His still slightly angry and yet caring voice calms me down and makes me feel safe. It almost feels a bit foolish to have been afraid of this for so long and I let my body melt against his. I continue listening to his heartbeat, inhale his wonderful scent, and think about his words. I’m grateful for them, even though my mind keeps on wondering what I might be to him. He seems to accept this whole situation so easily and I almost dare not hope what he might mean with that last sentence. 

 

So… better start a diversion. 

 

“I’ve got something for you that I think you should have.” I say and give him a short kiss before standing up. 

 

“Uh, so gravely. What is it?” He grins and sits up as well. 

 

I walk over to the wardrobe to open a drawer and search for something. I almost find it immediately and go back to the couch to hand him the second spare key to my place. 

 

“A key? How very sexy! No roommate agreement for me to sign?”

 

“I don’t do roommate agreements. I’ve got a Hanji who sorts out all the half-wits, remember? And my girl here takes care of the rest.” My finger points at Lizzy now who just sat down on the window bench. “She bit a guy once.”

 

“How sweet. I have to thank those two for that some day.” 

 

“Do that. They already adore you, you know? I can tell. Hanji would never have let us have this evening alone otherwise.”

 

“It truly is unusually considerate of her, isn’t it? Shouldn’t we make use of that? I could come up with a nice pick-up line and we could make each other naked. There have been so many ones accumulated over the last months… It’s quite astonishing.” 

 

“Hm. That many, yes? I’m curious!” I so want to peel him out of his clothes again. They seem to be such a waste.

 

“I think, one of them was something about you being hungry for biscuits and me certainly being a nice dessert.” 

 

“You are a nice dessert,” I agree as I step closer.

 

“Good to hear!”


	22. Chapter 22

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The first day back at the Tearoom.

When I wake up on Monday with the beeping of the alarm clock on my phone it is with a big smile on my face. I’m still here. And his back is faced to my chest again.

 

I’m home.

 

He still seems to be sleeping. I want to feel him waking up in my arms just to hug him, but I have to get up and don’t want to disturb his sleep.

 

So I carefully slip away from him and out of his, our, bed and make my way into the bathroom. Lizzy notices my movement on the mattress and squints dozily, before resting her head on her paws again to go right back into dream land. Apparently it is too early for her to join me. Cats are just human, too, I suppose. 

 

I shave and have a quick, and way too lonely, shower before I dress and go into the kitchen to prepare myself a cup of matcha. I need it.

 

Without really considering it twice I make a whole pot of Assam for Hanji as well and because I don’t want to leave without any note at all I stroll over to his desk. It is so tidied up and so much ‘him’, that I just have to smile at that sight. 

 

I sit down and scribble a short message with a pencil on his desk.

 

_“Didn’t want to wake you up, just because I had to go to work. Thank you so much for the lovely time! See you tonight—looking forward to it. Have a nice day._

_E.”_

 

And because the message seems incomplete, but an added heart is so lame and stupid I go with a lousy scribble of the next best thing. 

 

I leave his flat and knock on Hanji’s door before leaving the building. As expected, she already is awake and grateful for her pot of tea. 

 

“Good morning Eren. Thank you so much. You didn’t have to, though…”

 

“I know. Just was on my way anyway and thought you might need it.”

 

“You’re so sweet. See you again tonight?”

 

“Of course. I’ll bring Mikasa and Armin with me if they would like to join us.” 

 

“That sounds nice. Is he still asleep?”

 

“Yes, I didn’t want to wake him up.” 

 

“Then I will wait before I go upstairs. Better not force him out of bet two days in a row when he doesn’t have to work.” She winks now. “And with the tea from my lovely new neighbour I might even survive until noon.”

 

“Let’s not bet on that,” I grin back. And after considering shortly if it isn’t too personal I add. “He told me about how you got that scar after you left yesterday. Did he really kick that arsehole?”

 

She blinks shortly, obviously surprised, but catches herself quickly. “Yes. He did actually. His form was beautiful. Have you seen Kill Bill two?”

 

“Erm. Yes, of course. We even went to the cinema three times to watch it and went to the double feature as well. I love that film. Why?”

 

“Well, let’s put it this way: Pai Mei’s kick is crap compared to the show he pulled off.”

 

“Good. That bastard deserved it. Are you sure, you’re alright though?”

 

“I am by now, Eren. Thank you for asking. And anyway. He’s got you now, hasn’t he?”

 

“Yes, he has.” I simply state.

 

“I’m glad about that.”

 

“Me too, Hanji. See you later.”

 

We hug shortly and I leave for work. 

 

\- - - 

 

When I arrive at the Tearoom there’s no one there yet. I open the shop and the first thing I do, before preparing everything for the day, is to take the picture frame he gave me for Christmas out of my coat’s pocket and put it onto the shelf next to the register. I smile at it. It fits perfectly in this spot. 

 

It almost feels kind of strange being back at work after all the things that happened over Christmas. The last time I’ve been here I had been a nervous wreck, hoping but all the same wondering if our date would go well. Wondering where he would take me to and how the Holidays would be this year. 

 

As I fill up a few sample bags of tea leaves Mikasa and Armin arrive and shake off the cold. Mikasa is wearing her new scarf I gave to her and Armin grins as he watches me wearing his jumper. When I got dressed this morning I remembered in relief it was a turtleneck. _Score!_ For the hoarse voice I’ll brew myself a sage infusion. 

 

“Hi Eren,” they greet me and come over to give me a hug. We haven’t really been apart from each other for years and it feels good to be reunited. 

 

“Hello sis. Hi Armin. Good to see you again.”

 

“Glad to be back and see you too.” Mikasa answers. 

 

“How are Mum and Dad? I hope they weren’t too sad that I didn’t join you?” 

 

”No, not at all. They are fine and send their love for you and Levi. Here, from them. It is for the both of you. I also brought the photo album you asked for yesterday.” She hands me a bag and as I look into it I spot some small wrapped boxes. Christmas presents.

 

“That’s sweet. Thank you. I’ll call them tonight. Oh, by the way. Do you have plans this evening?”

 

“No, not yet.” Armin grins. 

 

“We were wondering if you would like to join us and Hanji for dinner.”

 

“We would love that,” Mikasa adds with her silent smile and I beam at them. 

 

“Perfect. I’ll tell Levi after I put out the flag.”

 

I let them get rid of their coats and fetch the Union Jack to hang it outside. After that I go to the computer to turn on some music—some Angus and Julia Stone today—and get out my phone to write a text to Levi. 

 

“Wow!” I suddenly hear Armin’s voice. “What a great picture.”

 

Mikasa steps next to him and smiles. “That’s so lovely. Where did you get it, Eren?”

 

“Levi gave it to me for Christmas.”

 

“How sweet of him.” 

 

“It has two more copies in the frame if you’d like them.”

 

“What about we take one for our place and you take the third one back to Levi’s?”

 

I grin at them. “Thank you, Mikasa. I’d like that.”

 

Soon after that the first customers arrive and the whole day seems to rush past us. It usually is like that on busy days, when you’ve got a lot to do that keeps you from looking at the time. A lot of shoppers today take their time and sit down at the counter for a few minutes to drink their cup of tea without a hurry. The bustle that had been going on before Christmas is gone now and the people already seem way more relaxed. They talk about their Christmas celebrations and about the first plans for New Year’s and ask us about ours. 

 

Around noon we have the first quiet moments since this morning and brew us a pot of afternoon tea whilst cleaning up in the back, restocking the biscuit plate, and filling up some more samples to display at the register. 

 

The tea is just about ready to be served as the door bell rings and Christa and Ymir step in. 

 

“Hey y’all.” Ymir booms and hurried over for an embrace. “Wow, Eren, you glow. Seems your Christmas has truly been very special this year, huh?”

 

“Hello guys.” Christa greets us. “We hope you had lovely Holidays. Thank you so much for the presents again.”

 

“You’re welcome” Armin says and I pour all of us a cup of tea. 

 

“How was your Christmas?” I ask. 

 

“It was very nice, thanks.” Christa answers. “We had both our parents over and such a lovely time. On Saturday we visited my grandparents and yesterday we were just relaxing. Doing nothing.” 

 

“Sounds wonderful.”

 

“It was.”

 

“Blah-blah-blah, guys.” Ymir grins. “Who cares about fucking Christmas? It happens every goddamn year. Tell us about your date, Eren. Mikasa didn’t want to say anything.”

 

“It was nice, Ymir. Thanks for asking.” I just smile.

 

“Nice. That’s all you have to say to me? Nice? I know that already. I want details, you dork. And you know it.” She is leering now. And the resemblance to Hanji is quite remarkable. 

 

“Okay, let’s see. He picked me up, cooked dinner for us, I met his cat, his neighbour—Hanji by the way—and then we had a lovely Christmas.” 

 

“Still not enough.”

 

“Well, that’s all you will hear from me.” I laugh as I hear her grumble and hand her a biscuit as a piece-offering. She takes it.

 

“Levi and Hanji are neighbours?” Armin asks. “That's so nice!”

 

“Yes, they are childhood friends and quite close.”

 

“How wonderful you had a great time, Eren.” Christa adds kindly. “We’re so happy that you found someone you like and who seems to like you back.”

 

Ymir snorts loudly but I know her well enough to notice that she’s happy too. Her freckles are dancing all over her face and her dark eyes are beaming at me. “Yeah…‘like’. Quite a collection of vampire bites you have there, Eren. I can see them, you know?”

 

Damn her observation skills. I just decide on poking my tongue out at her. And she answers in the same way with an added wink.

 

Christa smiles and takes her hand. “Will he be here on New Year’s Eve to celebrate with us?”

 

“I haven’ asked him yet, but I know Ymir will find a way to embarrass me anyhow.” 

 

“Damn right, I will! I still can’t believe your sweet sister blabbed about my perfect plans to make your head as red as fucking reindeer Rudolph’s nose. So humiliating.” 

 

“Look who’s talking!” I chuckle. “Who secretly stole my phone, hacked my code, spied at my messages, and came up with a strangely fitting way to annoy me?”

 

“Santa?”

 

“More like creepy Santa.”

 

“Yeah, well. He is an old, fat man that surrounds himself with funny Christmas elves, loves to wear a red white suit with a stupid cap all year long, and gives presents to children all over the world. If that’s not kind of creepy, I don’t know what is.”

 

We laugh and soon they leave again to make room for the other customers that, now that lunch time is over, continue to come in.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [ Angus and Julia Stone ](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=W8AvQE-Lu3U)make such a great music, so I loved the idea of it being played in the Tearoom.


	23. Chapter 23

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A lonely Monday.

It takes me a while to notice that my desk is covered in grey, elegant pencil lines. I had made myself my daily morning matcha, wondering about how quickly it felt strange to wake up alone again, with “just my cat” next to me, and no gentle arms wrapped around my waist. And it is oddly quiet in here without him. Yes… I miss him already.

 

After feeding Lizzy and listening to her happy munching sound I sat down on the couch to continue my novel. After a while I stood up again to make myself some black tea, just to notice that one of my tea pots is gone. 

 

That’s weird. Had Hanji been here without waking me up? 

 

I simply took the only one left and brewed myself an Assam before taking it back to the couch with me where I finished my novel with a grin. The series is getting better with every book. 

 

Luckily I already have the next one here. I stood up again to store the finished book back into the shelf and searched for the fourth volume and I decided to check my phone for text messages and mails.

 

The phone lies on my desk and that’s when I see it: Neatly written letters in a handwriting that I recognise at once and next to it is a small drawing of a smiling penis. 

 

How does he always come up with that wonderful ideas of his? 

 

I grin with a shaking of my head and start to read. My grin gets wider and I reach for my phone to text him something back, only to see there is another message from him as well. 

 

**From: Eren  
Good morning. I just asked Mikasa and Armin about dinner and they would love to join us. Your tea pot is at Hanji’s by the way. I brought it downstairs before leaving for work so you could hopefully sleep late today. Can’t wait for tonight. Give my love to Lizzy, please.**

 

I reply.

 

**From: Levi  
** **Good morning to you too. Great. I’m looking forward to it, as well. Have a nice day at work. See you later. Thank you for letting me sleep. Nice penis on my desk by the way.**

 

I make a snapshot of his scribbled message before erasing it (even when, not if, Hanji might spy at my phone and see it, the message is mine and I don’t want to share it with anybody but him…). And Idecide to write him something back there later as well, so he’ll have something to smile about on the next morning. 

 

After that I take my—needless to say, Lizzy observed—shower and get to work with dinner plans. Hanji might come over any minute now too. It is almost noon and even if her biggest hunger seems to fade slightly she is still Hanji and definitely in for some lunch.

 

My mind simply settles for pancakes and, as anticipated, as soon as the scent of freshly baked dough starts to fill the air I hear her knock on the door. 

 

“Good morning cowboy.” 

 

“Morning.”

 

“Here’s your tea pot back. My new favourite neighbour was so considerate to bring it over this morning before leaving for work. Such a sweet boy. Are you sure he’s real?”

 

“Well, I checked,” I answer and flip over the last pancake, before giving her a plate with a small tower on it and some maple juice. “There you go. Dig in.”

 

“Wow, you’re in a great mood today. Is that his doing? Because if yes: Never let him leave again. I like the new you.”

 

“Thank you, Hanji. I don’t intend to.”

 

“I heard we might be having guests this evening. Want some help?”

 

“What’s that about you being so helpful all of a sudden? Is this just for some room service in the morning or did something else happen to you? You didn’t hit your head, did you?”

 

“Well someone else did a few years back and apparently you told Eren,” she beams at me.

 

I’m glad she doesn’t mind that I told him what happened. “Did he say something to you this morning?”

 

“Just asked me if I was ok. I almost couldn’t believe it when he brought it up. Things between you two really are going well, aren’t they? And don’t worry. I already happy-weeped this morning in the shower, so I’m all dried out for now.”

 

“Tch.”

 

“Tch yourself,” she chuckles. “So, dinner. Help?” She mumbles as she begins to stuff herself with the pancakes.

 

“No, thanks. I’m just making some curry.” 

 

“Great. So we can sit on your couch and read all day?” She already moves to the sofa and crushes down on it with a sigh.

 

“Seems so. I’m going to pick him up later though.”

 

“Aww. How considerate. Take safety with you. You haven’t seen him for almost a day by then. It might be dangerous.”

 

“Oh, shut up.” 

 

\- - -

 

It is about half past six in the evening when I can not stand it any longer, and slip into my coat and shoes to go pick him up. The shop won’t be closed for another half hour or so, but I long to see him. Knowing he isn’t far away during the day never really helped but today it dominates my thoughts downright. So I finally just give in and fetch my coat.

 

Lizzy isn’t very happy with me leaving our cosy cuddle on the couch, but I let Hanji stay with her and promise I will be back soon. 

 

The outside world still is cold, and with Christmas just behind us and January and February still ahead there will be a lot of even colder weeks. But I don’t really care right now. 

 

As I step into the Tearoom I am greeted by a huge group of customers and two familiar looking guys at the counter on my left, drinking tea. Marco and Jean if I remember correctly.

 

I immediately spot _him_ behind the counter and he grins widely as he sees me. 

 

“Hi.”

 

“Hi.” I smile back at him. 

 

We don’t kiss. I haven’t seen him for a whole day as it happens and Hanji was right. Everything in me longs for him and his touch. It is too dangerous. Too tempting to just drag him into the back. We’ll have tonight. 

 

Too bad only that the jumper he’ got from Armin apparently has a small turtleneck. My fingers itch and want to reach out for him to slide under it. On the other hand it covers most of his bruises for the customers. And the weak spot for both of us. Just seeing it reminds me of all the nice things we could do…

 

_Tonight._

 

Mikasa smiles at me from the register and Armin in the next room greets me with a wave of his hand as he notices me. I wave back at them.

 

“Please sit down,” Eren says now. “I’ll pour you a cup. Is an oolong alright?”

 

“Yes, please. Thank you.”

 

Jean and Marco turn around, seem to recognise me, too, and after a quick gaze at Eren they both smile at me. Well, Marco smiles. Jean just loosens his frown.

 

“Hello, again.” Marco greets and I sit down on the bar stool next to him once more. 

 

“Hey.” Jean muffles. I don’t know why exactly, but I like him already.

 

“Hi. Marco and Jean, right?”

 

“Yes, that’s right. Nice to see you today, Levi. Are you here to pick up Eren?”

 

“Yeah, actually. And I might need some more tea for my neighbour.”

 

“You buy tea for your neighbour?” Marco wants to know. “How kind of you.”

 

“Well, she’s a very good friend and she always scrounges my supplies, so…”

 

Eren laughs now. “The Assam or the Darjeeling?”

 

“I think I’ll have an Earl Grey his time. The one with the orange rind? We didn’t drink it in a while and she loves it. 100 gram please?”

 

“Sure.” He says and hands me a cup of the oolong before filling me a bag with the Earl Grey. “How was your day? I hope it was okay for me to brew a pot of tea for Hanji this morning. I thought she might leave you alone for a while so you could get some sleep.”

 

I notice his voice is still slightly hoarse and try my best not to think too much of the reason why. “It was wonderful. Thank you. I got quite a nice message on my desk, too.”

 

He grins and closes the bag. I let him attend to his other customers now and Marco uses the opportunity to talk to me again. 

 

“I heard you two had a nice Christmas. Thanks for making him happy. He is such a good guy.” He beams at me so brightly and openly friendly that I feel a strange mix out of inner calm and wonder at the same time. 

 

“Yes thank you. I know, though.” I give him a solemn look. “How was your Christmas?”

 

“Quite nice too, actually. Thanks. We visited Jean’s parents on Christmas Eve and my family on Christmas Day. The other days were just hanging on the couch, eating pizza and watching IT Crowd.”

 

Finally someone who has seen the IT Crowd and obviously loves it, too. “That sounds nice. The IT Crowd is amazing. We watched Dexter.” 

 

“Did you like it?” I hear Jeans voice.

 

“Yes. Thank you for recommending it to Mikasa. I’ve already known season one but am very curious about the next.”

 

“You should be. It fucking rocks!” He says, his frown back on his forehead. It seems to be a friendly frown, though. “I like the fifth one most, however. But be aware of the end of season four. It’s ugly.”

 

Marco shudders at that and Jean takes his hand as if to calm him down.

 

“Good to know. Thanks.”

 

We talk more about the first season of Dexter and quote some IT Crowd jokes, along the long security telephone number of course, as I feel a pair of arms wrapping around my waist. They are so familiar already and my body relaxes instantly as I feel his touch. 

 

“Hi,” he mumbles softly into my ear. “I’m so glad you’re here.”

 

“Hi.” I turn around, just to realise that the shop is already empty and Armin is carrying the Union Jack inside. “Is it 7 pm already?” 

 

Next to me I hear Jean silently sing the telephone number again and after he finishes with “…three,” he moans shorty, mumbling “this fucking song will stick with me all fucking evening now.” He might be right about that. It truly is too catchy and can easily keep up with Elle Driver’s whistling.

 

“Yes. We’re done for today.” Eren says.

 

Marco, Jean, and me stand up to pay for our purchases—I smile as I see the picture frame next to the register—and after the two have left we close the shop together. 

 

I am so happy to see him again and as he reaches out for my hand to hold it I take it into mine without hesitation and squeeze it thankfully. 

 

We four make ourselves on our way to my place and are greeted by my curious cat and a beaming Hanji. She really is in an exceptional good mood today. 

 

“Hey you guys,” she cheers and comes over to hug Mikasa and Armin and slap Eren on his shoulder. I roll my eyes. She truly must love him already if she does that.

 

“Hello Hanji,” they greet her back before tending to Lizzy who is eagerly begging for attention by now. She strolls around our feet, poking them from time to time, whilst always looking up and miaowing curiously at our guests. 

 

“You must be Lizzy,” Mikasa says friendly, kneeling down. “Nice to meet you.”

 

“Wow, she is fluffy,” Armin mentions and I smile.

 

“Yes. And a real cuddle monster with strangers. I hope you don’t mind.”

 

“Not at all.”

 

“Great. Please come in.”

 

They leave their coats in the wardrobe and after removing their shoes they join Hanji in the living room while Eren holds me back to kiss me. M h!

 

It is almost a desperate kiss, his tongue strokes mine and I feel his need for more. It sets me on fire and I answer it passionately. My arms fly around him to grip his back and as he pulls away way too quickly, his eyes tell me he has to hold back too. 

 

“I really did miss you.” His arms wrap around me again to take me into a tight embrace.

 

“I missed you too. This place already feels odd without you being here all the time.” I fill my lungs with his scent and have to force my hands to stay away from the upper rim of his jumper. 

 

Later, my head screams at me. Tonight. 

 

Eren hugs me once more and steps away to hand me a paper bag. “Presents from my parents for the both of us. And the promised photo book.”

 

He really thought about it. I never quite got the idea of looking at photos with someone but I almost can’t wait for this. Seeing pictures of him as a child seems very intriguing. “Thank you. Also again for the message. It really took me a while to see it, though.”

 

“Did you erase it?” He doesn’t really have to tell me that he wouldn’t be overly joyous at the thought that somebody else might see his drawing.

 

“Yes, but I snapped a picture of it before I did that.”

 

“So you really liked it? I didn’t want to leave without any note at all.”

 

“Loved it.”

 

“Good,” he smiles now and we join the others in the living room. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> [The catchy phone number advertisement from IT Crowd](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=HWc3WY3fuZU) they are talking about.


	24. Chapter 24

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> An evening with guests and a bathtub.

It is nice having guests here. For all the years we’ve been living in this house it has mostly just been Hanji and me in this place, except for some random visits from Erwin, Mike, Petra or Moblit. 

 

Lizzy is out of her mind for having so many people around that all seem to like her. She enjoys being the queen of the evening and I love her and Hanji for taking the attention away from myself. 

 

They talk about their day at work today, it really must have been quite a busy one, but a good one too, and about Mikasa’s and Armin’s short trip to England.

 

I move into the kitchen to heat up the dinner I already prepared in the afternoon. It’s just some simple lamb curry with rice, that had been steaming in the rice cooker while I picked up Eren, and some freshly baked ciabatta. 

 

When the curry is hot again I taste it and notice Eren is approaching the stove as well. 

 

“It smells lovely, as always. Curry?”

 

“Yes, I hope you like it. I made some rice and bread as well.” 

 

“If I like it…” He shortly rolls his eyes at me before he takes away my spoon to taste the curry. “It’s delicious. As expected of course. And you even baked bread? Without me to watch? Bugger!” 

 

Why does his praise feel like he is undressing me and licking me from the bottom to the top? His eyes are beaming at me and I want to bury my hands in his hair again. Kiss him. Feel him. He truly is back. Standing in my kitchen, and looking wonderful, strong, and kind, and like the best damn thing that could ever have happened to me. 

 

I kiss him shortly before I answer him with a lowered voice. “Well, if I had went out for buying bread today it would have ended with me peeping at you in your shop all day long, making creepy eyes at you, while leaving Hanji and Lizzy all alone. And I knew that in the evening the bakeries would already be closed, so I decided to just made it myself.”

 

He lightens up even more at that and reaches out his hand to let it slip under my shirt. “It truly has been strange today. Luckily there was so much to do. Can I help with anything by the way?” 

 

“Setting the table?” God it feels good to sense his fingers on my back, touching me again. Having him so close. I’ve been longing for this all day long.

 

“Sure.”

 

“I’m sorry I made you hoarse.” I mumble before he can pull away. “I hope talking to customers all day wasn’t uncomfortable with that?”

 

His fingers start to draw small circles on my skin. Why did I have the stupid idea to invite guests today? I want to have him all for myself.

 

“Don’t be. We both did that, remember? And we had lots of fun with it,” he grins at me wickedly. “But no, it didn’t hurt. It doesn’t.” 

 

“Good. We could continue that later, if you’d like to.”

 

“We certainly should. Ymir noticed your bite marks by the way. She might come up with a sweet idea to embarrass the both of us because of that. I think you should know. Just to be prepared.”

 

“Thanks for the warning. We sure know how to pick friends, don’t we?”

 

His amused giggle makes its way all down his arms and vibrates on my skin.

 

Mhh. 

 

“Wouldn’t life be boring without these challenges?”

 

I snort in agreement. I wouldn’t trade Hanji for the world. “So boring.” 

 

“Awful,” he confirms and pulls away his caressing hand to move into the living room and set the table. 

 

After tasting the curry a second time and realising I actually have done that before—I blame that on being old, and pathetic, and starting to become senile—I cut the bread, fetch the rice, and carry everything into the living room. 

 

Lizzy seems to be crazy about Mikasa who already took a seat. My cat lies on her lap, looking as if it would be the best day of her life, blinking at her new best friend and purring like a maniac. She lifts her head with squinted eyes, leans into the fingers tickling her chin, and looks like she doesn’t intend to get up in the near future.

 

“Look who has already found a new friend.” I say, pointing at Lizzy with a smile. “I hope she doesn’t bother you, Mikasa. I could bribe her away with food.”

 

“No, it’s lovely. She is so warm and sweet.”

 

“Good. Please feel free to help yourself with the food. It’s lamb curry with coconut milk, some rice and bread if you’d like.” 

 

“Thanks again for inviting us, man,” Armin beams and reaches for Mikasa’s bowl to fill it up. 

 

“Glad to have you here,” I reply as Eren sits down next to me and takes my hand again. Eating curry and rice with just one spoon is more than just possible as it turns out. At least it is a lot easier than eating peas and Christmas ham with just a fork. 

 

And even if it really is wonderful to have guests over, celebrating just a simple evening and life with some food and chattering, I find it hard to fully concentrate on the conversation. Luckily Hanji, Eren, and Armin are doing a great job talking so I can let my mind wander a bit, and just enjoy his presence after one whole day of being apart. 

 

Hearing his voice again, hearing him laugh, feeling his hand in mine…I take it all in.

 

Five more days to go until his next free day. No , that’s not quite right. This is another short week with New Year’s coming up, followed by their usually closed Monday routine again with the start of the next year. 

 

They had decided to make an exception in December and have the Tearoom open on every Monday as well during Christmas time. It usually might not be a completely work-free time for them, there sure are things to do apart from “just selling”. But I still hope to see more of him during those days. 

 

Am I a selfish person to think this? 

 

Hanji achieves to surprise yet two more living beings with her hyper eating skills and I sigh in relief when she declares to really be stuffed as she empties her forth bowl with the last few drops of curry. There’s only some rice and bread left in the end and Eren helps me to clear the table and wash the dishes before joining the others in the living room again. 

 

It is around 10 pm when Mikasa and Armin decide to leave and Hanji makes her way downstairs soon afterwards as well. 

 

Similar to this morning it suddenly is unfamiliarly quiet after all the happy chattering. The only difference now is that he is here with me. Filling the room with his delightful calming presence, his laughter and his warmth. 

 

He decides to unwrap his presents and call his parents right away, before it might be too late for them, to thank them. He got a small digital camera, a pair of Spongebob socks, and a card with greetings for the both of us with a kind request to sent some photos soon. It must be very nice to have caring and loving parents. 

 

While Eren makes the call I go into the bathroom to run us a bath. I want to be naked with him. And cosy. And have him close. Soapy, hot water seems to be a very reasonably good plan to get all of this at once. 

 

I go to the fridge and fetch a bottle of champagne that I put in there this noon, open it silently with only a quiet fizzling sound, and get out two glasses to bring everything into the bathroom. I search for the big candle in a glass that used to be a vase some day, and I know that I stored somewhere in the kitchen cabinet after long balcony nights with Hanji in the summer, lighten it, and bring it into the bathroom as well. 

 

By now the tub is almost filled, so I turn off the water and begin my hunt. 

 

He stands in our living room, his back to me, talking to his parents and sounding at ease. The sight is so endearing that I almost want to stay and watch him. But the water is getting cold and I’m getting impatient. Therefore I sneak up on him, hug him from behind and bury my face between his shoulder blades.

 

So perfect. So warm. So him. 

 

I let myself enjoy this moment shortly, with him leaning into my embrace, and listening to his smooth voice vibrating through his back and into me, before I pull away again, kiss the back of his neck just slightly missing his sensible spot—quite proud of myself for resisting that for now—, and start to undress. 

 

The first thing that flies away is my shirt and since he still has his back turned to me I walk around him once while already working on my pants. I take my sweet time as I step out of them, just throw them on the floor and grin at him. His mouth is open, clearly lost for words for the moment, and his eyes flash their green sparkles at me. I keep on walking to the bathroom, very content with my obvious impact and step into the hot water with a relieved sigh. 

 

I've just filled the two classes with champagne as he steps into the bathroom as well. “Well, that was a weird first. I almost sexy-drooled whilst talking to my parents.”

 

“Glad I could help with that.” I smirk. “Would you like to join me? Its lonely in here and I want to be naked with you. Maybe even do some silly stuff together…”

 

He already pulls at his jumper. “How considerate.” After his trousers are gone as well he pushes my back slightly to reposition me at bit and steps into the tub to sit behind me. My heart makes a small jump.

 

How does he know that I have longed for his embrace since waking up alone this morning, missing his broad chest at my spine, his arms wrapped around me and our legs intertwined? 

 

It even dampens my urge to seduce him for now. I just want to feel this. Him. Where I belong. 

 

I sigh and snuggle even closer now, letting my body melt against his, enjoying that he is here with me, before I reach out for the champagne. 

 

“Fancy,” he hums into my ear. “You even got a candle. It’s so lovely. Thanks.”

 

“It’s good to have you home,” I simply state and we clink glasses. 

 

He hugs me tightly. “I’m glad to be back, too. Tell me about your day. What did you do? Did you have it nice here?”

 

“Well, I did indeed sleep late, thanks to you and your room service for Hanji, drank a cup of matcha, and finished my novel. The third volume was even better than the second; can’t wait to continue with volume four. I think you might like it, too. The heroine is quite crazy.” I grin up at him. “Actually she reminds me of you a bit.”

  
He chuckles softly and makes me shake with him, while his fingers draw bold lines on my chest and stomach. “Sounds very nice. Remind me to read it, when I’m finished with Armin’s book. At what time did Hanji show up?”

 

“It must have been around noon I guess. Just after I've read both of your delightful messages and decided to make her some pancakes for lunch.”

 

“She really is a bloodhound for food, isn’t she?”

 

“She truly is.” I sigh.

 

He reaches for the yellow rubber duck on the rim of the tub, makes it squeak a few times right before my eyes, and rests it on the top of my head afterwards with a happy smirk that I can not see but all the same know it is there. I feel it in the way his cheeks swell up at the sides of my head and how his chest trembles with a silent laugh. 

 

“You just love to do improper things to me, don’t you?”

 

“This is improper?”

 

“You don’t feel this way?”

 

“The way I see it, if someone could complain about this particular situation here, it sure is the duck, don’t you think?”

 

“Tch.”

 

“Mhh!”

 

_Oh!_

 

“Eren?” My voice purrs again. I can’t help it.

 

“Hm?”

 

“Are you thinking about ducks right now or are you just happy to see me?”

 

“I indeed _am_ thinking about ducks. Thanks for asking.” I want to turn around in the tub to tickle him in revenge but his arms and legs hold me in place too strongly for solving this without a bubble bath massacre. He squeezes the duck on my head again to make it squeak cheerily. 

 

Such a brat! But I can play too. So I try it again.

 

“Tch.”

 

There are definitely no ducks on his mind! 

 

“But since you ask, I actually am very happy to see you, yes,” he growls now, and he moves is hips to poke me. And even though the invitation is so sweet and I need him too, so much, I simply want this moment to last for a while.

 

“Do you think we can manage to stay in here just a little longer first? This is so nice.”

 

“Isn’t it? Thanks for undressing in front of me and inviting me in. I would have missed a very important moment in my life.”

 

“Couldn’t let that happen, could we?”

 

He hugs me even closer again and the duck on my head slowly slides down, makes a small, squeaky jump off my shoulder, and finally makes a splash into the water. 

 

“Oh no! It is drowning now! What can we do?” he laughs brightly. 

 

Seriously. Full of wonderful, surprisingly weird thoughts that man. How can you not love that? 

 

I honestly don’t know an answer to that myself, so I turn around in his arms to rest my ear on his chest again and kind of…weird-hug him. Screw this bloody small bathtub. But I guess we are lucky enough to still fit in here together. 

 

His hands immediately seem to know what I need and one runs through my hair while the other one rests on my back to stroke it carefully. Up and down and up again and it is so relaxing, so comforting, that it almost makes me doze off in his embrace again. 

 

Almost. 

 

I still feel his cock pulsating between us and my own one likes that very much…not to mention his gentle fingers everywhere on my spine, sending prickling goosebumps all over me.

 

“Mh,” I look up at him. “So much for enjoying the moment, I guess.”

 

“Admit it, you’re just thinking about the duck now, yourself.”

 

“Tch.”

 

I want him to shut up. So I turn my head a little more to nibble at his collarbone, while my hand slides to his erection. It just looks too nice. Too intriguing to resist it. And yes, it immediately makes him stop talking incoherently. Revenge is sweet indeed.

 

His head falls back a little. “Mhhh.”

 

Without letting go of his neck, or his cock, I turn a little further and sit down on his thighs, facing him. My legs are wrapping themselves around his waist, and now our erections are pressing against each other. This feels so fucking good.

 

I hiss as I sense him, so hard already and hot, even in the warm water, and I long for more. I let my tongue aim for the spot on his neck that I know will make him go mad. It doesn’t fail its effect and as a heavy groan escapes him I feel everything inside of me cringe in delight. He sounds so wonderful, I will never get enough of his. 

 

“Levi…” his low voice echoes through the bathroom, making it sound even better.

 

More! 

 

His hands splash in the water as they reach out to wrap around my waist and caress my ribs and back, encouraging me to go on. I let my tongue lick him once more, only to be rewarded with his hands clawing into my skin, right before a second perfect moan vibrates through us. 

 

“Ahhh!” It sounds higher already. More out of control. 

 

I swear to god, this man will kill me one day with the delicious sounds he makes. How is it even possible to make such noises? They wash over me, cover my every nerve, pierce through my skin and shoot right into everything I am. It is arousing as fuck and my cock already pulsates in pure lust. 

 

To think about me masturbating in the shower almost exactly a week ago, dreaming about this sweet man, screaming my name in his compelling voice into my ear…fantasy-him doesn’t even have a chance against the reality!

 

And no one this cute and innocent looking should be able to scream like that. Not with such an irresistible voice. Not that obscene. Not that tantalising. It isn’t fair. It is too much! And still, I can’t get enough of it. 

 

I long for it. I want him to feel how crazy I am about him. I want to show him what I don’t really know how to put it into words. How much I want him. How much I long for being his. Only his. My whole body aches for him, begs for his touch. And now that he is here, I will never let him go again. I need him. So badly. So fucking much.

 

So I struggle for self-control before resting my mouth on his neck to suck. Gently this time, but I still let my teeth scratch slightly over his skin. I want to make him crazy. I want to make him see pretty stars. I want to leave my mark on him. And I want to give him everything.

 

I need to hear his moans, his screams. And as he gives in instantly with another arousing “Ahh!” and a responding roll of his hips against mine I feel my whole body shudder in utter bliss.

 

His legs spread a little so I sink down a bit, making our touch even more intense. _Oh my god!_

 

Now it is my turn to gasp. “Fuck, Eren!” 

 

I let go of his neck before it can kill me completely. His eyes are beaming at me, dark with lust and twinkling with amusement. His tousled hair is framing his head like a halo and suddenly something very primal in me roars proudly. He is here. With me. Looking at me like that. And bloody hell this man is gorgeous! I want to lose myself in him. And give him everything I am.

 

Both of my hands are shooting upwards to hold his head, slightly crawling his hair in the back of his neck, while I let my thumbs brush over his cheeks, and press my lips on his. 

 

His tongue finds mine at once and strokes it with slow, tender movements that send a greedy fire down my spine, while his hands are moving upwards to gently run through my hair now too, and his eyes flutter shut. I instantly feel my back moving on its own to arch upwards and against him, making our erections glide against each other. Soapy water was such a good idea! 

 

My mind threatens to go blank and in a desperate struggle for self control I kiss him back. Faster. Stronger. It’s still not enough. One of my hands lets go of his neck and glides down between our bodies again. As I grip both of us I feel his stunned groan vibrating through me and all I can do is whimper back. 

 

The whole bathroom is filled with the sounds of our kiss, with the constant spattering of water and his wonderful gasps, accompanied by mine. It is spurs me on.

 

I start to pump, not breaking our kiss. His fingers are fisting my hair now and _oh my god_ I need it. I have to feel him so badly it hurts. And his greedy, hot sounds, increased by this room, push me closer and closer…

 

Ours breaths are heavy and desperate now and his hold on me becomes even stronger, so I rest my other hand on his back to steady him. 

 

My head is spinning, I am glad his hands hold it in place. I feel him shiver and know he is close, too. Everything in me screams in pure happiness and cheers me on to continue. Another scream echoes in my ears, hums through my tongue, aims for my heart. I hear his voice is almost breaking again and I know this is it. 

 

As his tongue brushes mine once more after a begging, shivering gasp of my name on his lips as he comes I follow with a relieved sigh. I feel the spasms rock my body and the only thing I can do is hold on to him until I come to a rest. 

 

We brake apart to look at each others eyes, still holding each other. His fingers are gently caressing my cheeks and my neck, telling me everything I need to know.

 

After a while he suddenly chuckles again. “I hope Lizzy isn’t underage.” 

 

She really is sitting on the toilet again, her front paws folded and per whole appearance tells that she doesn’t intent to move soon. “It is her problem if she can not control herself,” I grin back at him and kiss him once more. I am addicted to him. There is no other explanation for all of this. 

 

“What a shame we ruined our bathing water so quickly, though. Cuddling is so lovely.”

 

“We could make a refill. Or just move to the couch.”

 

“The couch plan sounds perfect, too,” he smiles at me. “But we should try this again soon.”

 

“Definitely.”

 

We finish our glasses of champagne and rinse ourselves clean before we make our way back to the living room in comfortable sleeping clothes, taking the candle, bottle, and glasses with us. I pour us each a second round and slip under the blanket next to him, to rest my head on his chest again. Who could have thought simply resting on the couch, next to the person of your dreams, holding each other, whilst exchanging careful tenderness could be this comforting?

 

The rest of the evening flies past us and soon we move into the bedroom to go to sleep. But not without me writing a short message to him on my desk while he is brushing his teeth before going to bed. It is short, but it’s the only thing I can come up with, when I think about him. And since it would be so lame to copy his magnificent penis drawing from this morning I draw the next thing that comes into my mind, and quickly slip into the bedroom so he hopefully won’t see it before tomorrow. 

 

A minute later he crawls into bed too, lets me snuggle against his back, and soon we fall asleep.


	25. Chapter 25

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tuesday.

I awake from the sound of an alarm clock going off and some shuffling noises to switch it off. I turn around in our bed, hug him from behind and inhale his lovely scent that, after one night of sleeping, is all him. 

 

“Hi. I didn’t want to wake you up. Go back to sleep.”

 

“Cold without you,” I manage to mumble and feel his hand on mine now to squeeze it. I kiss his neck, it is just too delicious not to, lying here in front of me, like on a silver platter. 

 

“Mhhh. Good morning to you, too.”

 

”Good morning.” I let him go before I fully lose control over myself and he stands up, just to bend down again and kiss me. 

 

I will never let him go to work without that again! 

 

“Would you like me to make you a matcha after my shower?”

 

“A matcha would be nice, indeed. But are you sure I shouldn’t make it?”

 

“You’re on holiday. Seize it. I’ll be right back with the tea.”

 

Tea in bed. Never had that before. I congratulate myself for falling in love with an apparently very wise man.

 

I hear the sound of the shower echoing through the flat and tend to Lizzy now, who is resting next to me and waiting for her morning snuggles. My fingers run through her fluffy hair and it feels nice. 

 

Cold winter days require a cat at your side. It will make everything so much better. The stiff hands when you wake up loosen up instantly when they touch warm fur and in the evening you always have your own, living hot-water-bottle whose purrs never fail to make you feel better. 

 

Yes, I’m getting old, thinking about this. But nevertheless it is true. 

 

Soon the sound of water is gone and he comes back into our bedroom to get dressed. Of course I watch him. Not to take advantage of such a glorious opportunity would be stupid. He looks so beautiful in the morning, so sexy with the light of the rising sun illuminating him through the windows, making his skin glow and the first dry strands of his hair look almost golden. I watch his movements and almost start to drool. 

 

Just as I thought the sight couldn’t become even better he slips into a light beige shirt that suits him just as well as my favourite white one. _Fuck!_

 

I groan. Maybe it had been a bad idea to peep at him after all. My morning wood is throbbing, screaming at me to seduce him right here on this spot. Because I know, this picture won’t leave my mind all day long now. Perfect. Just perfect. 

 

“Are you sure you don’t want to come back to bed?” I murmur in a weak attempt to lure him back to me.

 

“Pervert,” he smiles. “Watching nice, innocent, young men getting dressed without feeling ashamed.”

 

“Wouldn’t miss it for the world. And who is the pervert here? With you harassing me with yet another one of your gorgeous shirts so early in the morning? I will have a boner all day now.” 

 

“Mhh!” _No, don’t do that. No sexy humming! That just makes it worse!_ “Did you just tell me I’m gorgeous?”

 

“Tch.” _Of course he is._ He is fucking adorable!

 

His chuckle fills the room and I pull the blanket over my head to secure my eyes from the mean world that unfolds in front of me and apparently wants to mock me.

 

Too soon he is gone again and I hear him working in the kitchen before he steps in once more, holding two bowls of matcha in his hands. I sit up, he settles down on the edge of the bed as well, and we drink our tea together – he out of my bowl and I out of his.

 

I like seeing him before he will leave for work. It is lovely and I would like to drown in his beautiful eyes right now that seem to examine me with a sparkling, beaming smile. That reminds me… “How late is it, anyway?” 

 

“It is almost quarter to ten.”

 

“You open at eleven, right?”

 

His fingers are tickling Lizzy’s chin now and she obviously thrives in it. _I am so not jealous…_ “Yes, but we need half an hour to an hour to prepare, so our work days start a little bit earlier.”

 

“Of course.” I reach for his knee and suddenly feel his lips on mine in a kiss. What a charming man! 

 

“Mhh!” I hum after he breaks apart, obviously reluctant. “I pick you up again tonight.”

 

“That would be nice.”

 

“Looking forward to it.”  


 

“Me too.”

 

We finish our tea and he brings the bowls back into the kitchen. He even seems to clean them up, when I hear correctly.

 

He comes back once more to kiss me goodbye and presses me back into bed with a smug grin, where – I have to admit – I stay with a low but actually very happy grumble. 

 

A few minutes later I hear the door close behind him. Lizzy and me are alone again. I wonder if he got my message on the desk. He didn’t say anything. As curious and matcha filled that I am I let my eyes close once more and fall back into a short, nice morning doze. 

 

\- - -

 

After a while I wake up again and decide to make myself a pot of black tea. He must have brought Hanji her morning portion again, since there is only one pot here once more. I smile at that thought. 

 

How does he get all of our routines so quickly and makes them into his own? It is so endearing and kind, and if he were here I would hug him right now.

 

While the tea leaves are infusing the water I walk over to my desk to see if the surface has changed. 

 

It has. He hasn’t erased my message and so his neatly written lines are standing next to my rough ones that almost seem ungraceful to me in comparison. I can draw very well, even if I do it quickly. It’s part of my job after all. Writing however truly is a different kettle of fish. 

 

_“I’ll never leave without a good morning kiss again.  
Can’t wait for tonight.”_

 

My heart jumps at that and a proud grin spreads on my face. Somehow he always seems to know what I am thinking. And small things like this sweet note, along with that beautiful weird mind of his captivate me and make me feel whole.

 

The timer for my tea beeps and I walk into the kitchen to get out the leaves, reminding myself that I only need one cup instead of two…

 

I miss him again already. Why does it feel like we’ve always been living together? It doesn’t feel right without him anymore. I can spot traces of him everywhere in this place, even after only one week, and I love it. I need it. They comfort me when he is gone and make me strangely proud. His matcha bowl on a shelf in the kitchen. His book on our coffee table. His clothes in the wardrobe. A second towel in the bathroom along his shaving equipment, toothbrush, and perfume, and his laundry mixing with mine. 

 

And his scent. Especially in our bedroom. I want to drown in it, even if it reminds me that he is at work right now and that I will have to wait for tonight until I finally see him again and can melt back into his wonderful embrace.

 

I sink down on the couch and smile as I spot his socks lying there, crumpled. I am truly starting to become senile now… being happy about worn, creased socks on my sofa! 

 

Exactly at this second Hanji decides to delight me with her presence. 

 

“Good morning prince charming,” she chirps. She seems to be in an even better mood than yesterday. And the Hanji sirens in my head start to blurt out again.

 

This happiness of her is becoming abnormal. It is so uncommon. Something is up.

 

I decide to deal with it in the only way I am able to come up with and glare at her with all the nasty intensity I can manage to put into it. “Okay, shitty glasses. What’s wrong?” 

 

As always it doesn’t intimidate her. At all. She doesn’t scream in fright or even fringe. Not even her eyes twitch. On the contrary. She giggles. “Why?” And now I know for sure that something indeed is going on. Something big. I don’t know a thing about it. And I probably won’t get it out of her, even it I’d cut her skull open. Great.

 

“Tch.”

 

“Eren brought me tea again this morning. What a lovely boy. Are you sure he’s real?”

 

“Didn’t we have this exact same conversation yesterday?”

 

“Did we?”

 

I let out a frustrated groan and snatch my now empty tea pot out of her hands to clean it. Just to see she already did it herself. And she didn’t just wash it. She cleaned it as in fucking soaked, scrubbed and polished it. What the bloody fuck?! Hanji never cleans without being forced to. Ever.

 

I’m in hell! 

 

“Did you honestly clean my tea pot?”

 

“Looks that way, huh?”

 

“Why?”

 

“Just felt like it would be fun doing it.”

 

Shit. Not good. “Why?” I'm growling now. 

 

“ _You_ ask _me_ why I cleaned something? Is this opposite day?”

 

The urge to rip her head off to look inside and see what she’s hiding from me is becoming bigger and bigger. “Hanji…?”

 

“Hey, that’s my name!” she looks radiant. 

 

“Hanji!”

 

“Still my name. I’m so glad, you remember it! We should check on that now from time to time. We both don’t get any younger, you know?”

 

“Are you sick? Should I call the police? Or Scotland Yard?”

 

“If they don’t call Inspector Lestrade to send Sherlock in his pyjamas you don’t even have to try.” Even fucking Sherlock couldn’t get out of her what I want to know…

 

“Okay I give up. What do you want?”

 

“Great. Wanna hang out today? I even brought bubbles.” She fumbles in her pockets and, indeed, hands me one of two bottles with bubbles with a wide beam. As if it would make sense. 

 

I give in. Not that I have a choice. “Whatever.”

 

She lets herself fall down on my couch, blows a few bubbles (much to Lizzy’s fright – she is very irritated by the strange flying objects that keep on popping into wet little drops with weird quiet noises) and finally grabs for Eren’s book to continue reading in it. Meanwhile I fetch a second cup after all and put it next to mine besides the tea on the coffee table. 

 

I reach for my own book as well and try to concentrate on it. It doesn’t really work. Hanji giggles every other minute over something she read and disturbs my thoughts even more than they are already. I kick her in the shin a little. 

 

“Oh, come on, Hanji. What the fuck?”

 

“This book is so hilarious! You should read it. It would make you smile from time to time, mister grumpy face!”

 

“Tch. I’m smiling…”

 

A snort. “And I’m so going to kiss Eren for that some day.”

 

“Back the fuck off. He’s mine. I’m not sharing him.” 

 

“Not even a bit?”

 

“No.”

 

“Not even a tiny bit of his brain?”

 

“Not a bloody chance.” 

 

“Bugger.”

 

She continues her read… and her giggling. Yesterday has already been a real challenge. Waiting for it to become evening so I finally could go pick him up. But yesterday I had a happy distraction with preparing dinner and baking bread. Today there’s just pizza on the plan and it almost makes itself in the evening. Also… yesterday hadn’t been so awfully bizarre with an overly thrilled Hanji. I wish I knew what was on her mind. 

 

At least I slept until noon today. After all the work in November and early December I really could use it as it seems. I haven’t felt this well-rested in weeks. And still…

 

I sneak a peak at Hanji, who is laughing her bony arse off again and decide to push my luck once more. Never give up. And maybe catch your best friend off-guard to gather information they wouldn’t share with you otherwise…

 

“So what did he say to you this morning?” It surely must have to do something with him. My guts scream it at me. Even if I can not put a finger on the why and what.

 

Another giggle. “Who?” Jackpot! Her fanatic snickering tells me it really is about him.

 

“Oh, come on! I knew you talked earlier.”

 

“Oh, you mean Eren!”

 

“Of course I mean Eren. So what did he say?”

 

“Nothing.” Crap. I’ve got no chance here.

 

I sigh. And take another look at my watch. 2 pm. 

 

“By the way… Are you trying to starve me out or something? I didn’t have breakfast today and now no lunch, too? How mean of you. I won’t invite you to my birthday party if this becomes something regular now. And there you are, complaining about a weird day…”

 

Finally. Something to do! About her freaking me out I totally forgot to make her something. That never has happened before…

 

I grumble a complaint, but we both know it’s actually an apology, and search for something to make her. As I look into the fridge my eyes notice the small can of cream that almost is overdue and I settle on semolina pudding. It’s something sweet but it will calm my nerves to help me over the afternoon, and Hanji won’t mind anyway as long if it is edible. 

 

A few minutes later a pot of milk, cream, and sugar is boiling on the stove and I whisk in some semolina along a pinch of vanilla powder. I wait for the mixture to thicken before I pour it into a few bowls. The nice flavour that clings to the air by now is delightful. Comforting, soothing, sweet. Perfect. 

 

_Just like him…_ I suddenly think. Hopefully there will be at least one of them left this evening so he can have a portion, too. Or I’ll just make him a fresh one. It’s best eaten warm anyway…

 

I get interrupted by Hanji who managed to sneak up on me and now is pulling one of Eren’s socks over my ear with a hilarious cackle, that makes her arms clasp to her chest. 

 

_Please let this afternoon be over soon!_ I beg silently, as I shove a spoon and some pudding into her hands, hoping it will make her shut up for at least a few seconds. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Of course I have the recipe for the semolina pudding for you:  Heat 500 ml of milk with 100 ml of cream, 2 tbsp sugar, and a pinch of salt. Add a bit vanilla if you like. As soon as it boils pour in 65 g of semolina whilst stirring. Let it cook (still stirring) until it thickens a bit and divide it to bowls.


	26. Chapter 26

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tuesday, part 2.

My day promises to be a very exciting one. 

 

It all starts when I walk into the kitchen to make our morning tea and see his note. I am not expecting it and still thinking about his luring, lingering looks during me getting dressed… maybe this is the reason why I almost stumble out of nowhere. 

 

But when I stroll past his desk I notice a short message written onto it. Written in strong, prominent letters and something else added to that, that looks bigger but much more fragile at the same time. 

 

I step closer to read it.

 

The drawing catches my eyes first. It is a small, rough scribble, but perfectly pictured with neat lines – a draft of an anatomically correct heart. And written next to it is only one line.

 

_“Thank you for making me happy.”_

 

I freeze on the spot. Whatever I thought that I had expected… it surely was something else entirely. I am so touched and overjoyed all of a sudden, that my eyes burn with tears. I want to cry out of pure emotion. But it would worry him so I do my best to keep it in. I also want to jump around, make stupid air kicks and dance.

 

I gaze at the whole image once again. 

 

His fine, steadily drawn lines are making a strange and fascinating contrast to the raw and powerful letters next to it, and I realise it perfectly portraits him. All of his contradictions that I have come to adore. His care and his outer facade that implies pure aloofness. His tenderness and his roughness. His insecurity alongside his directness and endearing boldness. His strength and all the same his love. It is all here in front of me on this desk. 

 

This one simple sentence, accompanied by his drawing, tells me everything I have to know about this man. _My man._

 

It is all ever dared to hope for.

 

And there I had been yesterday, thinking a drawn heart might be silly and pathetic. I couldn’t have been more wrong. It is completely the opposite. It is the most wonderful thing that anyone has ever done for me. And he probably doesn’t even know it. Maybe he doesn’t even understand what it means to me…

 

I am glad I have the tea to prepare to have something to do. Familiar motions to calm me down and set my mind straight again, because going into the bedroom right now would end in me kissing him like crazy and us staying in bed for the rest of the day. But I have to go to work. So I open the fridge for the matcha powder, heat some water and prepare our drink.

 

When did he write that? His desk had been totally clean and letter-free at dinner yesterday. Did he stand up at night without me noticing? 

 

_Thank you for making me happy._

 

I know I have to respond to that note somehow. But I want to do that without sounding cheesy. I want to tell him everything I feel.

 

Emotions threaten to overwhelm me. 

 

Hearing people curse about love and how much it can hurt you all my life always has made me angry. Women crying about men who had hurt them and who now were determined to blindly hate every single one of them out of pure self-protection. Men ranting about women and all their stupid and annoying habits. Men grumbling about their boyfriend being an arsehole and women hating their girlfriend for the same reason… 

 

I always thought, hoped, knew, that I might do it differently. Not falling for the wrong person that would hurt me in the end. _‘There must be someone out there for me’_ I always had thought on lonely New Year’s Eves, birthday parties and dinners. 

 

Being confronted with a doting Jean, always concerned about ‘his Marco’ and a love-struck Ymir going overly crazy about sweet Christa had made me feel happy for them but all the same alone… almost envious. Even in the midst of Mikasa and Armin. It just was different with them. 

 

I had longed for someone who would make me complete. Someone who’d accept and like me, just for who I am. With all my craziness and intensity that some people actually might find a bit scary. Someone who I could love back, without holding back, because I wanted and needed to give that person everything I have and am. I wanted to dedicate myself to this man, whoever that might be. Being in there with 200 percent, because to me… any less than that would not be honest enough. It would feel like losing out on the best parts.

 

And then he had stepped into our store. With his whole Celtic prince look going on, making my heart go nuts for him instantly. I had never truly believed in love at first sight. Until then. And it only had grown with every time I had seen him again.

 

_Thank you for making me happy._

 

My heart wants to explode and gratefully yell out that I feel the same. That I understand…

 

Too soon two bowls of matcha are ready and I force my legs to move shake-free into the bedroom, and to him. 

 

He sits up in his bed with a grateful and almost too inviting smile as he sees me, and I sit down next to him before handing him my bowl. I don’t really know why it always pleases me to switch our matcha bowls for drinking. Maybe it is a stupid territorial man thing. It doesn’t matter what it is. It just feels wonderful.

 

I feel his eyes focussing on mine which are trying to examine him and tell him everything I can not say right now. 

 

How I wish I could stay this morning. I could ask Mikasa and Armin for a free day off, but not today. Not directly after Christmas. It would burden them with additional work and I already leave them all alone at home. I don’t want to vanish completely from their lives. Also, the shop is my responsibility too, my obligation as well. And I’m proud of that. So I just look at him, trying to remember this moment for later. Doing my best to hold back. At least for now. 

 

Even if his face always tries to conceal his feelings they are all still visible if you look close enough. 

 

This morning I can see kindness. Tenderness. Trust. A feeling of security. Content. Even some kind of vulnerability, that he only shows to me and sometimes to Hanji,… and something more. Something deep. 

 

“How late is it, anyway?” He suddenly asks. 

 

I look at my phone. “It is almost quarter to ten.”

 

“You open at eleven, right?”

 

I want to touch him so badly. But I know how this would end with all the feelings bubbling up inside of me, so I try to calm my fingers with crawling Lizzy next to us, who immediately starts to purr. 

 

“Yes, but we need half an hour to an hour to prepare, so our work days start a little bit earlier.”

 

“Of course.” I feel his hand on my knee, sending warm sparks all through me. 

 

Oh, what the hell! I lean closer and kiss him. Not careful this time, but strong and needy. And I have to force myself to pull back again.

 

“Mhh” he growls, his eyes sparkling with delight. “I pick you up again tonight.”

 

It sounds like a plea and a statement at the same time. “That would be nice.”

 

“Looking forward to it.”  


 

“Me too.”

 

After that we drink in silence and as we finish I take both of our bowls into the kitchen again to wash them up, still thinking about his note. I will thank him back, and I already know how. Maybe it is too pushy and maybe too much. Too soon… But like he already said a few days ago. It just feels right. So who cares? 

 

_I sure don’t as well!_ And even if I will have to wait until tonight and it scares me a little I’ve never felt that fantastic, so relieved. So utterly happy.

 

For the time being I need a reply though, so I write down the first thought that comes to my mind.

 

_“I’ll never leave without a good morning kiss again.  
Can’t wait for tonight.”_

 

No drawing today. His is saying everything there was to tell anyway.

 

I want to rip my heart out for him, just so he can have it. I know he would protect it. I don’t mind that we’ve been together for not even a week now. I don’t care what others might think. I want to scream it into their faces. There simply are some things in life that I don’t want to hold back. This is certainly of of them.

 

Before I leave I go back to him once more to give him a quick goodbye kiss. And since I want him to get some more sleep I push him back down into his pillow. He should get all the rest he could get. I still have nightmares about the dark circles under his eyes a few weeks ago. 

 

I fetch the teapot I had already prepared for Hanji and make my way downstairs. She is family too, after all.

 

\- - -

 

As yesterday she opens her door only a few seconds after my knock and beams at me happily. 

 

“Good morning. Room service?”

 

“Good morning to you too, sweetie. And thanks again!” she smiled gratefully. 

 

My instinct says I should tell her. “Hanji?”

 

“Yes, Eren? Why do I have the feeling these lovely morning calls of yours are always connected with a very serious discussion about life?”

 

I grin. “I’m going to tell him tonight.”

 

The reaction I get is different that I had expected. She looks at me for a whole minute, eyes big as saucers behind her glasses, her mouth open in some kind of shock, and suddenly her whole features melt, and before I can intervene she howls like a sea lion. 

 

Not good.

 

“Oh shit. Hanji?”

 

I shove her inside, close the door behind us and take care of the steaming hot tea pot first before going back to her and embrace her in a—what I hope to be—comforting hug. 

 

“Shh…” I don’t really know what else to say to her as she rests her head on my shoulder and shakes with loud, wet sobs. “Hey…shh! I’m sorry. What did I do wrong?”

 

“Nothing you stupid arse,” I hear through her tears and so I just stand there for a while and continue hugging her before she manages to calm down a bit.

 

“Better?”

 

She sniffles. “Yes.”

 

“Okay…?”

 

She steps away and now I see her big smile. Her eyes are still watery but so kind and warm that all I can feel for a second is pure relief. She is okay. 

 

“Don’t you ever dare surprise me with something like this again, Eren. Not like that! Not in the morning. And never ever, when he is around. Or I swear I will kill you!”

 

“I promise I won’t do it again.”

 

“Good. Because he doesn’t really cope with it very well when I cry. Even if it’s good tears.”

 

“I swear.”

 

She sniffles again and searches hear pockets for a tissue to blow her nose. “What happened?”

 

“Hm?”

 

“Well, something must have happened. So what is it?”

 

“He drew me a heart.” I mumble.  


 

“He did _what_?”

 

“He drew me a heart. Not a tacky drawing, no. A real heart. An anatomically correct one. Next to a message that said he was thankful for me making him happy. And all I can think about is how I cannot even frame and keep it, Hanji, because he drew it on his stupid desk.” 

 

“Uaahhhh…” and now she cries again. 

 

_Fuck!_ I hug her once more and let her pour it all out onto my coat.

 

“Come on, please. Don’t make me cry as well. I almost did a few minutes ago when I saw it.”

 

“I’m so…ho…horry” she snivels.

 

We hold each other and finally I feel her arms loosening their grip on the front of my coat, to wrap themselves around me. 

 

“Thank you, Eren.”

 

I’m confused. “What for?”

 

“Everything.”

 

“Pardon? I don’t follow.”

 

“For being here. With him. Making him smile. Just…thank you.”

 

I feel a lump form in my throat “You actually do want me to cry too, don’t you?”

 

“No,” she chuckles and steps away again. “Honestly, though. Thanks.” 

 

“Well. You’re welcome. I guess… Even though I didn’t really do anything.”

 

“Trust me. You did. You are.” 

 

She grins happily, wiping away her second round of tears, smacking my shoulder and I grin back. “So, big hero. What’s your plan. Tell me everything so I can torture him all day long with it and make him curious. It will be so much fun!”

 

“Behave yourself, will you? At least a bit?”

 

“We’ll see.” I think it is a hopeless case with her after all. But at least she stopped crying and I feel relieved that she is alright.

 

“Well I think I’m just gonna tell him when I am back from work.” 

 

She beams at me. “I’m so happy. When can I go upstairs to tease him?”

 

“Maybe wait one or two hours.”

 

“Perfect. I’ll clean his pot. He will freak out like crazy.” She literally is clapping her hands out of joyous anticipation. Poor Levi…

 

“Don’t be mean, Hanji. Better not give him a stroke before tonight or _I_ will hunt _you_ down for a change.”

 

“Don’t worry, Eren.”

 

“So. Can I leave you here or will you break down again when I go?”

 

“I’m perfectly fine. Safe and sound. Thank you.”

 

“Good. If there is anything, please call me, okay?”

 

“I will. Have fun at work.”

 

“Bye, Hanji.”

 

“See you later, Eren.”

 

I hug her once more before I leave. I owe it to her after obviously shocking her so badly in the morning. And I need it as well.

 

\- - - 

 

Work today is not very easy to concentrate on, but it at least helps to cope with the anticipation. My heart is racing all morning long, my stomach is filled with a whole army of angry monster butterflies, and the only thing I can do is count down the minutes until tonight. 

 

Around noon I get a text message. 

 

**From: Hanji  
Hello tiger. Going upstairs now. Muhaha! Love ya.**

 

I grin at that, even if I feel a little sorry for him. An average day Hanji is already hard to cope with but if she even goes upstairs with the plan of annoying him all day long…?

 

It’s afternoon and already dark outside as Mikasa joins me at the register. It has been another very busy day but by now most of the customers seem to already be done with shopping. Usually this is a busy time in our work day but today, right now, there is no one here. Except us three. 

 

“Are you okay?” she wants to know. Of course they noticed that something is up with me today. We always sense it when someone of us is a little bit off. Her new scarf is wrapped around her and I hug her shortly. 

 

“Yes, thank you sis. I’m just a bit nervous.”

 

“Nervous?” Armin’s cheer echoes to us from the back. “Why? Did something happen?”

 

“No, not really. Nothing bad. Just nice things.” I open a bar of chocolate to calm down before I mumble “I want to tell him that I love him tonight.”

 

Armin slaps my shoulder. “Such great news!”

 

Mikasa, silent as ever, just smiles happily. “I’m glad.” That’s all she says. She doesn’t have to say more. 

 

“Can we help with anything, man?” Armin asks.

 

“No. Thank you, though. I am sorry I haven’t been at home lately, it just–”

 

“Nah. Don’t worry. We understand. And we are happy for you.”

 

“Thank you. Again.”

 

Armin beams brightly and once again I am grateful for having such a great family. “That deserves for a good tea! I’ll open the last bag of Go En.” 

 

Before I can intervene he already has it in his hands and spoons it into his favourite kyusu, and heats up the water. 

 

The Go En is amazing. I almost forgot already how special it tastes. Sure, I’ve known it, but really experiencing it again is different from simple memories. It is dark green, almost like spinach soup, and wonderful. It sets my mind at ease at once and as soon as we drink the second infusion I feel a little bit better. 

 

I hate having to wait, not being able to do something. Feeling helpless. Having to oppress my intense need for action out of impulse. And even if I know that I probably will simply blab it out anyway as soon as we will be alone or in some totally unfit moment (because real planning is another thing I am bad at) I still can not do a single thing right at this moment.

 

By now it is almost 6 pm and I just went into the separated room with our Japanese tea to re-stock the product bags and pottery there, as the door bell rings and announces a customer. 

 

“Hi,” a voice calls out. His voice. And I feel my whole body relax. All the edginess, all the nervousness completely falls off me in a heartbeat. He is here. Everything’s fine. 

 

I’m home again. 

 

“Hello Levi.” Mikasa greets him. “Would you like to share a sencha with us? We just brew a rarity.”

 

“Yes, of course. Thank you Mikasa. Hi Armin!”

 

“Hello, man. Good to see you.”

 

I come out of the Japanese corner to greet him with a hug. “Hey! Good to see you.”

 

“Hi.” His eyes beam at me, even though his eyebrows are wrinkled in a small frown. “I had to flee. Hanji was driving me mad.” That’s very easy to believe and I just laugh in response.

 

We sit down on the bar stools at the counter and I pour us each a cup of tea. 

 

“That really is fantastic.” He says with a smile that starts to spread over his face. “It’s a rarity Mikasa said?”

 

“Yes, they only made a few kilograms of this tea for a special project. And it tastes so strong. This is the second infusion…you should have seen the first one. Dark green and almost opaque. I’ll make it for you some time.”

 

“That would be great.”

 

We are finished with the second infusion and I am just about to stand up to make a third as Armin steps closer. “Would you two like to leave early? I don’t think there will be much to do during the next hour.”

 

“Are you sure, Armin?” I ask, feeling Levi’s hand squeeze mine. 

 

“Yes.” Mikasa adds. “We can manage. There’s no point in keeping you from having a nice evening.”

 

“Thank you. I’ll be here early again tomorrow for preparations.” 

 

“Thank you, you two.” Levi says.

 

“You’re welcome.” she smiles. “And thanks, Eren, that would be lovely.”

 

And I hurry to fetch my coat, scarf and cap.


	27. Chapter 27

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The big L.

I thought we were going home directly, but instead he grins at me as soon as we step outside the shop, takes my hand with a caring squeeze and leads me into another direction. “Come on, I want to show you something.” 

 

My feet obey without hesitation. Anywhere he wants to take me is fine as long as I am with him. Even if I almost can not wait to rip his clothes off—the picture of him dressing this morning has truly stuck with me and it had made me jumpy all day. Maybe I should burn all of his button-ups…or make sure he never ever runs out of them? I’m torn.

 

But also I am too curious what could possibly be on his mind now. “Would you like to let me in on your plan and tell me where we’re going?”

 

“No. Not yet,” he chuckles, his turquoise eyes winking at me and little clouds escaping his mouth due to the still freezing temperatures outside. Even they are cute and absolutely adorable! “Like a wise man once wrote to me,” he continues “otherwise it wouldn’t be a surprise, would it?”

 

“Tch.” Of course I know what he’s talking about. It is the exact same thing I texted him when I didn’t want to reveal where I would take him on our date. “You should seriously stay with that wise man. Even if he sounds like an old guy and a fucking mystery-monger. I bet he’s amazing in bed.”

 

He laughs, tiny dimples showing on his face, holds my hand a little tighter, and we keep on walking. 

 

I feel something is different with him today as well. He seems almost frisky. _Has he been like this this morning too?_ I wonder. I can not recall sensing something strange a few hours ago. But right here and now something definitely is a little odd. An since I usually can read him pretty well with his emotions showing so easily on his face, I take a closer look. 

 

He apparently is excited about something, whatever that may be. And he seems to be happy, totally at ease. So it is something good that’s been going on. If it wasn’t he would tell me or show it somehow. He wouldn’t look this radiant. And Hanji wouldn’t have acted this loony all afternoon today. I shudder at that thought.

 

As if he could read my mind again he asks “Tell me about Hanji. You said she was driving you mad today. What happened?”. His voice sounds amused, almost as if he knew what was coming now.

 

“Tch! Fucking Hanji in happy crazy mode, that’s what happened.”

 

“So bad, huh?”

 

“Utterly cruel. Something was up with her today, but I can not put my finger on it.”

 

“What did she do?”

 

“She fucking _cleaned_ , Eren. Voluntarily. She brought that tea pot back upstairs with her, looking so goddamn neat that even I couldn’t have done it better. It honestly scared the shit out of me. She never cleans on her own, not even for money. Mostly not even for food.”

 

He giggles. “That must have been quite a sight. I wish I could have been there.”

 

“Me, too. She pulled stupid pranks on me all day…even brought me bubbles.”

 

“As in soap bubbles?”

 

“Exactly. Freaked me out and poor Lizzy with the bubbles themselves as well.”

 

“So you had a bubble party without me? We must catch up on that some time. I love bubbles!” He doesn’t seem to be too surprised at my narrations and it makes me wonder. But before I can really wrap my mind around that and start to pester him with questions about what he and my lovely obnoxious neighbour of choice could possibly have talked about this morning, he stops walking.

 

“We’re here,” he calls out with a jolly cheer. “How nice that we could come here earlier. They usually don’t have much left after 7 pm since they close at eight.” 

 

I glance up and my contemplative scowl eases up a bit at once to turn into an enquiring one. We are standing in front of a…donut place? I notice at once it isn’t the one where Hanji usually likes to go. The sales counter is long and filled with a beautifully decorated and colourful selection of donuts on the left, some small containers in the middle for some dessert that is advertised with bright badges and banners in the back, and another selection of bigger donuts on the left. ‘Cronuts’ it says on a label. I’ve heard of them before but never got the chance to taste one. 

 

My eyes look back at him in surprise and the question I have must be obvious.

 

He grins at me. “I know, we’ll have the legendary Levi pizza later, and your cooking truly is heavenly. But trust me. These are the best donuts I ever ate. Please help me to take a pick for dessert. For Hanji too, if you don’t mind. I don’t know which she would prefer most. It’s on me.”

 

I examine the display once more, a little bit closer now. Everything looks delicious. And the big selection makes it really hard to decide. “Is there something you can recommend? It’s quite overwhelming.” 

 

“Well, I like the chocolate ones and the one with apple sauce filling is delicious. But I heard every single one of them is fantastic, so just choose what sounds good to you.”

 

My eyes wander to the counter on the right again. “Have you already tasted the cronuts?”

 

“Yes. They are infernally good. You definitely should try one!”

 

“Still hard to decide…”

 

“We could take a box with six and slowly nosh through them?” He offers.

 

I smile at him. “Sounds splendid. Will you help me pick?”

 

“Three each?”

 

“Perfect.”

 

We step even closer and place our order. We pick six filled ones: Two different kind of chocolate filled ones, one with strawberry, one with mango, another one with apple sauce and the last one with some kind of cream filling. Once again I notice his English accent when speaking German and it is sexy as hell.

 

He takes our bag with the box in it, and as we continue our walk home I almost can not take my eyes off him and his beautiful smile, while he talks about his day at work.

 

The closer we get to our house the more I feel myself almost bursting out of sheer anticipation. I’m usually very good at holding back, but he is driving me crazy. Screwing him right here and now, on the street, with all the snow, that has again started to fall down on us, and temperatures below the freezing point, his screams echoing all through the neighbourhood, suddenly seems to be such a splendid idea. 

 

He looks at me with a smirk before pointing at the snow-covered lawn next to us, interrupting my lively memories of gorgeous neck-sucking and echoing screams in the bathtub yesterday. 

 

“Have you ever made a snow angel?” …w _hat?_

 

“Pardon?” I raise my eyebrows in a frown. 

 

By his mischievous look I can tell he is up to something zany again. “A snow angel. You know? Lying in the snow and flapping your arms and legs.” His eyes are mocking me. “Laughing? Maybe even doing some hilarious crazy giggle screams, because it is so much fun? No?” 

 

Before I can come up with a snappish answer that might even be brilliant and sophisticated he already steps into the crunching snow, places the plastic bag with the donuts next to him and lies down in the wet, cold, ugly mess. Is he insane? He might catch a cold. Or even get pneumonia! 

 

But he just smiles up at me with his wonderful eyes sending sparkles at mine, and reaches out with his hand to pat on the other spot next to him. “Come on. Join me. It will be great!”

 

I know he won’t change his mind before I made a fool out of myself too and since I can’t bring it over myself to refuse any request he has and I truly want him to not get sick, I lay down next to him with a very heavy sigh. “Happy?”

 

“Very.” He beams. “And now flap.” 

 

He shows me how—as if I was stupid…of course I know what a fucking snow angel is, I grew up with insane Hanji after all—and soon we are wiggling our limps in the bloody snow like two bloody stupid people. Which we are apparently. 

 

And the worst thing is…with him giggling next to me in the most wonderful voice ever and his happiness washing over me I soon giggle with him. How could I not? He decides that this is exactly the right moment to stand up again, pulls me up as well, and points his finger at the two imprints we left behind. 

 

“Look.” He snickers, his breath still shaken with laughter. “Two angels. Wasn’t that nice?” He looks back at me again, bright as ever and every now and then another late chuckle escapes his chest in a misty cloud. His hair that is escaping his cap is full of tiny snowflakes which glisten in the light of the lamps. His cheeks are red from the cold and his eyes focus on me with what feels like to be at least a thousand sparkles dancing around. Even his eyelashes are sprinkled with snowflakes that start to melt due to his warmth. The whole image is breathtaking. _He_ is.

 

I grin back at him and pull him into a short kiss, before I notice the snow really is indeed wet and cold as fuck and our soaked trousers start to freeze. “Come on.” I brush his hand in mine with my thumb. “Let’s get you out of this bloody cold and back home. It is warm and cosy there.”

 

I want to move to grab the bag he threw onto the lawn but his hand pulls me back again. His gaze is suddenly intense, filled with longing, kindness, and affection, and so open for me to read that I almost know the words before he says them. The world comes to a halt, and the second right before he finally opens his lips feels like an eternity. “I love you, Levi.”

 

The feeling that spreads through me is…marvellous. My mind snaps as pure happiness rushes over me and drags all the blood right out of my (now dangerously spinning) head. I grip the front of his coat, smash my body against his and kiss him passionately. I hear a familiar moan and it thrills me to hear it. It cheers me on even more. I let my tongue glide into his mouth once more, fiercely conquering him and letting him feel how much I need him right now. I put every emotion in it I can find. Relief, joy, excitement, care…and love. 

 

Love for this fascinating man in my arms.

 

My forceful kiss pushes him backwards and we stumble back into the snow, where we land with a dull ‘thump’. I want to roar out of pure satisfaction and I groan into his mouth. He fastens his grip and before I know it he has rolled us over. I feel something smash under me, it must be the box with the donuts, but who cares about them right know? He loves me. And he is pushing me into the snow with his kisses that taste so wonderful, so much like him that my heart wants to burst out of happiness.

 

Our lips are swollen when he pulls away, looking down at me and he reaches out his fingers to brush away a strand of my hair in front of my eyes. His breaths are heavy, his gaze greedy and I know we will barely making it into our flat before we will jump at each other like clumsy teenagers. It already had been hard to control myself earlier.

 

“Blimey.” I finally pant, grinning up at him so widely it almost hurts. “I wanted to say that first.”

 

He chuckles and leans down again to kiss me once more. More careful this time, more solemn, even more intense. I feel his tongue slowly caressing mine and his loins are grinding against me with a needy wave. 

 

“Eren?” I purr as he lets go of me once more.

 

“Yes?”

 

“Let’s go home. I want to fuck.” I move my boner upwards against his with a decisive, urging push. “In a nice, soft and warm bed–”

 

Before I can finish he has already dragged me up. He snatches for the bag of crushed donuts, holds on to my hand and we hurry home. Fortunately, it isn’t far. 

 

\- - -

 

I don’t know how we make it home. Or into the house and up the stairs to our door. The only thing I do know is, that now we are here. And I want to fuck his brains out. 

 

We kick off our shoes, not minding where they land, the bag with the squashed donuts already lies forgotten on the floor—funny how the messes he makes never seem to bother me at all—and I rip his cap off his head, and kiss him fiercely, while he already fumbles for the buttons on my coat. I free him out out his too, and push him back against the next best surface, which apparently is the door. He lets out a gasp and I hold him there, with my hands fisting his shirt, my hips pressing against his. 

 

He starts to grind against me instantly, even with the little space I let him have, and my mind goes crazy with all the things I want to do to him. With him. He is so perfect. _And fuck, he said he loves me._ I can’t bear so much joy. It’s overpowering.

 

I break apart to stare into his eyes. I need to see him…god he looks gorgeous! His cheeks are still pink, all the way up to his ears, his lips are swollen, red, and wet, and the way he his biting on his lower lip whilst staring back at me with a loving glare is almost too much. I want to roar our of gratitude but only settle for a growl that makes him tremble in anticipation.

 

“Hi,” he breathes at me, his chest moving heavily, and his hand slipping under my shirt to glide to my back, asking me to continue.

 

“Hi.” I lean over again to kiss him more. His lips are so soft and strong at the same time, so warm, his tongue is hot and tenderly wraps itself around mine in a fucking incredible way, that makes my whole body yell for more. I let my hands slide down to his sides and deepen our kiss even more until his arousing moans echo through my mouth again in all the fucking right ways. 

 

_Bed. Now!_ My hands shoot down until they get a grip on his arse, I pull him further up the door, and lift him up whilst wrapping his legs around me. He squeals in surprise and fists my hair, his arms around my neck and his lips still on mine, while I walk us into the bedroom. _I knew working out would eventually pay off one day._

 

I let him down on the bed and kneel down on it too so I sit on his lap. My whole body shivers. And I can not decide what do do next. I want to do everything with him. It is all too much right now. Tenderness overwhelms me once again. I want to belong to him. I want to make him mine and him to make me his.

 

“Mhh, so eager” he pants as he caresses my back up and down. His fingernails scratch me a little as I shortly press my erection against his through our pants and a heated hiss escapes my lips that lets him smile knowingly.

 

I smirk back at him, lean over to lick his ear, and wait for his first sigh echoing in the room before whispering “could you say it again, though?” I nip his earlobe and lick it a second time in a soft, slow stroke, dipping my tongue in his ear cup and slightly nibbling once more. “You know…the thing you said before?” His back arches up with another one of his moans right next to my head and his hips try to push upwards, even tough my weight is still pinning them down. 

 

Agitating reactions of his body like these will be my condemnation one day. He is always so graceful and steady, with his mind doing all those little surprises to me that make me want to laugh, and smile, and turn to him like he is the sun itself but right now he is literally melting and so beautifully out of control that it urges me to continue. It’s arousing as fuck and still I let go for now to let him catch his breath for a second and scrape together coherent words.

 

Teasing him is so much fun. I can’t help it. And his ear is so delicious. “Mhhh, come on. Please speak up Eren, you know how I hate the mumbling…”

 

“Ah–” His hands have helplessly fallen down my back by now and are clenching my arse. We are still wearing our ice cold and soaked pants. And our shirts. So while I wait for him to answer I pull apart with a last lick—at least for now—and do what I wanted to do since this morning: I unbutton this goddamn shirt. I take my time and don’t look away from his endearing face as my fingers work on every single button and fondle his skin, before the bloody thing is finally open and I can slip it off his shoulders and arms. My hands are stroking his ribcage, gradually trailing to his nipples. Oh, what I could do to him…! 

 

He holds my gaze, the misty shades in his eyes fading a bit and he finally sighs it again under his heavy breaths. “I love you, Levi.”

 

I feel myself shiver and let my thumps flick on his nipples. “Once more please?” My voice is low and rough from emotions, my lips are back on his before he can answer, and now my fingers are twirling on his nipples, curious about how much it takes to make him speechless again. 

 

A muffled “Nnnn…I nooove u” vibrates through my mouth, followed by a flutter of his tongue against mine and a choked whimpering of my name and _shit I can’t stand it any more!_ There are just too much clothes between us and if he is keeping up with uttering sounds like these I’ll be finished way too soon. My dick is throbbing already, my pants have become too tight a whole while ago, and I need this man and everything I can get from him so badly by now it hurts. 

 

I break away again, tug my shirt over my head and push him down on the mattress. His chest is moving heavily from his rushed breaths and I can feel his erection pressing against mine. 

 

Off. Everything off! I reach for his belt and shuffle backwards to pull on the fucking wet pants, relieved to feel that his legs are warm under it, despite the freezing cloth that clung to it. Off goes the underwear too and a few seconds later it is followed by my pair of trousers and underwear as well while he repositions himself into the middle of our bed. I crawl back to him and gently push him even further up on the bed until he rests on the pillows. His hands are flying to my chest and up to my neck to pull me back into another kiss and it is needy and wet and full of his little, greedy moans that vibrate through the both of us. His hands grip my hair now and pull slightly, making my cock twitch already, begging for more. _More!_ But I’m not done with him yet.

 

So carefully I bite into his lip, lick over it and fixate my eyes on his while slowly licking, nibbling and sucking my way downward, all over his chest and onwards, dipping my tongue into his belly button and continue even further.

 

I look at him from the close before meeting to his gaze again, and it makes me almost drool. He is wonderful, hard, and twitches at my glance, and his already wet tip is inviting. The second I stick out my tongue to lick over it Eren’s eyes roll back. 

 

“Mhh…” He moans and I dig my hand into his thighs, pinching him with my fingers until he looks back at me again. I want to see everything. I need to see the changes in his turquoise eyes, finding out what he likes and _fuck he’s exquisite_. So I lick again, circling him once, twice and tasting him, and do it a third time with a slightly different pressure. 

 

His mouth falls open with a guttural sound that ends in another whimper when I take him all in, I hollow my cheeks and let my tongue swirl around. His eyes shutter close with a squint and as he lets out another voiceless gasp I let him go with a quiet ‘pop’. 

 

“No, no. Come on. Look at me.” My slightly shaking voice might betray me but this is just to tempting. “And I want to hear you Eren. It’s so fucking sexy, don’t you dare holding back.” His chest shakes with amused and breathless chuckles as he beams down at me and I glare back with a smug grin. 

 

“More?”

 

“Yes, Levi, plea– ah!” He is fully back in my mouth again, almost choking me and I love it. I love his beautiful out of control reactions. I love his moans and screams, and how he fists my hair now so desperately. I rearrange a bit so I can reach his balls, lick over them as well and suck on them tenderly, and his back arches upwards so very tantalising and accompanied by a noise that should be illegal. 

 

How can one be able make such a sound anyway? It’s dangerous! I go back to his cock, that’s so hard now that I can feel he’s close. His eyes are still burning in mine, a sparkling, glittering green with almost silvery stars in it that cheer me on, beg me to continue but I let him go again, slowly this time, while licking over his tip once more.

 

“L…levi?” 

 

“I want to you to took at me when you come. Can you do that, Eren?”

 

“Wh…?”

 

“I want to see you. So. Can you do that for me, love?”

 

He nods hastily and still not averting my eyes I gradually suck him back in, pressing my tongue against him and caressing his balls with my fingers. 

 

“Ahh, Levi…”

 

“Mhhh…” I hum and suck once more with a stroke of my tongue, right before he winces and comes into my mouth. 

 

His eyes beam at me, nearly turning to show the white, but he holds my gaze and it almost makes me come as well with a heavy shudder. I gently lick him once more and pull away, his hand are still in my hair but run gently through it now while he just looks at me with that wonderful smile.


	28. Chapter 28

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pizza time.

“I adore how you always completely melt” he smirks up at me, tenderly kissing my thigh and caressing my hips, while I still try to come down from what just happened right now. 

 

Where did he learn to do blow jobs like this? Why does it arouse me so damn much, when he gets bossy? How can he always stay so composed? How come that I love such a cunning bastard that is so wonderful at the same time that it almost hurts and rips my heart open? How could I _not_ love him so much, when he is so intense—everything I long for, everything I always dreamed of?

 

All these questions run through my head but instead of asking one of them I keep it simple. “Will it always be like this when I say, that I love you? I never got manhandled like this before. It’s fucking hot.” 

 

He grins and gently bites my thigh. Shit. I just came all over his tongue and this is still arousing. “Good to know. Could you please just say it one more time? I guess I’m old. I tend forget so easily these days. It’s a curse, really…”

 

Now it is my time to grin. Of course he’s fibbing. Levi doesn’t forget. He’s so perfect he probably never ever forgets anything. Like a crazily tiny, disturbingly hot elephant with an alluring smile and a dark frown. 

 

“I can say it backwards, if you’d like.” As he just lifts an eyebrow to that I try it “Uoy evol I”. 

 

His expression that flashes over his seductive glare is hilarious and it makes me giggle instantly. So I keep on going, curious how he would react. “I could say it in foreign languages, as well.” 

 

He freezes, obviously in anticipation. I guess he wants to hear more. And I start digging my brain for all the knowledge and effort that I had put into my important education during all my life. 

 

“Klingon: qamuSHa’.” His eyes widen incredulously. _This is precious!_ “Elvish, Quenya: Ni Meleth le. Sindarin: Gi melin…or was it _le_ melin? I’m not quite sure anymore, sorry…” 

 

“Where the bloody hell did you learn all that stuff? And most importantly:  _when?_ ”

 

“TV? Books? You should try it, sometimes. It is fun.”

 

“…”

 

I keep on going. “Huttese: Uma ji muna.” 

 

He shakes his head with a stunned smile. “These languages aren’t even real!” 

 

“Sure they are. How dare you say such a thing? Especially to the Middle Earth and Star Wars universes!” He snorts with a chuckle and I go on. “Shyriiwook: ah anoohowo rooohu.” I see him shiver and crawl over me again. Did I really turn him on whilst sounding like a wookie? “Dothraki: Anha zhilak yera. Parseltongue: szzshhhzzzss…or something like that.” 

 

“Okay. Hanji has been asking me this every bloody morning now and I’m just going to go with this. Are you fucking _real_?”

 

“Well, you just sucked my cock, so you tell me.”

 

A growl. Oh-oh!

 

“Binary…ehrm…” the predatory glow in his eyes is somewhat distracting “010010010–” He pins me right back down into the soft pillows, his hands on my shoulders and his lips smashing on mine. He rubs his still very hard and hot—and god is he wet already! _—_ cock against mine and as his tongue conquers my mouth I’m realising to become hard again myself. 

 

Honestly…how does he do that? 

 

“Nnngh!” 

 

He pulls away again and looks at me softly. “Eren?”

 

“Yes?” Seriously. These constant sudden personality changes should creep me out. Right? _Right?_ So why don’t they? Instead they just let my heart melt and jump out of joy and other parts of me very…interested.

 

“Why didn’t you wait for me to say it first?”

 

“Well, because you’re slow, grandpa.” His eyes twitch with a small threat. God, that really is hot! Why is it so hot? “And because I do love you.” I let my hands cup his face now, my fingers caressing his cheeks, his jaw and his lips. “And your message this morning was so beautiful that I wanted to tell you. I needed to.” Well, hence we’re at it, “And I already told you before, you know?”

 

“What? When?” and there’s is scowl back. Even this is hot. 

 

I’m helpless. A stupid love-stricken fool. It is amazing! “Whenever I said ‘as you wish’…?” I let that sink in, my fingers and gaze still exploring his beautiful face. His eyes are fixated on mine, slightly moving as if they were searching for something.

 

“You didn’t even give me a chance? How cruel.” I see the cheerful twinkling in his eyes and wrap my legs around his waist to pull him closer and hold him firmly in place. At least until he’ll decide to turn me into a weak, needy mush again.

 

“Sorry. Couldn’t help it. You made me so happy, it just…came out?”

 

“I made you happy? How? We hadn’t even dated then.”

 

I smile mildly at his concerned frown. “You really want to talk about this now? I could thank you for all the sweet things you did to me a few moments ago first.” 

 

“Yes. Now, love.” _‘Love’?_ His curious, warm look meets mine and makes my mind go blank. After a few seconds of silence I feel his hand brushing away a strand of my fringe that fell into my sight. His strong fingers are so warm, so gentle, and caring that I feel my heart skip a beat. 

 

He peers down at me with the question still on his face and his grey eyes are fixing their gaze so intensely on me that I feel goosebumps rise all over my body. And now his lips are curling up in a wicked smile. “We have time. Waiting for you to be in for continuing anyway.” 

 

What? 

 

“Continuing?”

 

“You heard me,” he smiles even wider now. “So, please fill me in, yes? How?”

 

“Okay, let’s see. First I had been waiting for this to happen for so long, you know?” I let my hand stroke over his back now “I was hoping I didn’t fright you with the card and when you invited me to the date it was, well,…amazing? And I just knew. Don’t know why.”

 

I don’t tell him about me waiting for him to ask me out until I finally couldn’t bear it any longer. I don’t tell him about how panicked I was that he might back out at last second. I don’t tell him about how he makes my heart jump. How he makes my head spin and my thoughts circle just about him all the time.

 

I don’t tell him how I felt on our first night. My heart pounding so hard I could feel it in my throat. My hands almost shaking. My stomach churning. His wonderful eyes staring at me from so close, burning me. Him, closer than he had ever been to me without anybody else around. Eating his delicious food that he had obviously put so much effort in. Just for me. His nervous smile. His wonderful scent everywhere around me. Compelling me. His endearing movements. His voice. Me not able to hold back any longer anymore. My legs standing up on their own, going over to him and my body reacting out of pure instinct. Him kissing me suddenly, so wonderfully intense and passionate…I don’t really have to, I guess. He always seems to know anyway. Like earlier. Something in his expression had told me he already knew what I wanted to say.

 

So I just let that all be unsaid for now. Instead of talking I’d rather focus on him. On how he’s still looking at me. On how warm and strong his back is, where my hands still draw their way up and down. On how comfortable he makes me feel. On how much he amazes me. 

 

Which reminds me of… “Where did you learn to draw like that? And do you realise how mean it was to put that message onto your desk? So I couldn’t keep and frame it?”

 

His first irritated looks changes into a most beautiful beam. “Practice.” That’s all he says. As if this would explain everything.

 

“Really? Do you learn everything on your own at that Batman school?” 

 

I grin up at him and he chuckles back. “Only the important stuff.”

 

“But a heart?” I really am curious. You don’t usually learn to do anatomic drawing at art schools, do you?

 

His hand is playing with my hair now. It runs through it, then lingers at a short strand to curl it around his finger. “I had a project a while back for a medical book publishing company and I had to draw organs for them. I’m not really an illustrator, but I can draw, so I learned really much during that assignment.”

 

“It was brilliant! Thank you.”

 

He almost looks relieved. “Not too disgusting?”

 

“Are you joking? I loved it.”

 

“Good. I was worried.”

 

“Hm. But why?”

 

“It’s a human heart?” _Oh, really?_

 

“Oh, this was a _human_ heart?” I try to say with a stern amazement that totally goes wrong halfway through. “Uaaaa.”

 

“Tch.” He laughs. And it shakes my whole body. _Oh!_ “You really like that, don’t you?”

 

“Apparently.”

 

“Tch.”

 

“Mhhh.” Not fair. This man should come with an instruction manual plus safety warning…

  
“You so like it.”

 

“Then what are you going to do about it?”

 

He leans down and kisses me, feathery at first. His lips brush over my mouth, nibbling at my lips and then his tongue gently licks over them with an almost lazy movement that makes me sigh. He dips into my mouth, and slowly, but steadily gains pace. His kiss becomes more fierce with every stroke of his tongue and soon I hear myself moan heavily again. 

 

\- - - 

 

A quarter hour later my neck is covered in new bite marks, one of them almost actually bleeding, because he dug his teeth in there when coming deep inside of me, making me follow him with a pathetic whimper, just after hearing him whisper into my ear that he loved me back. 

 

Now we are standing in his kitchen, me slightly wobbly on my feet and I text Hanji that we’ll be tending to the pizza now. She’ll probably smell it anyway, like the bloodhound she always proves to be, but I wanted to tell her anyway. 

 

**From: Eren  
** **Want to come upstairs to munch squished donuts? Got some here,…**

 

“Would you like to make the pizza, love?” A smooth voice asks, as two strong arms hug me from behind in a tight embrace. We just made the bed—it actually had smelled like sex by now and even if I got the feeling he doesn’t mind my messes as much as other’s I still don’t want him to feel uncomfortable in any way. 

 

He truly would let me cook his pizza? What if something went wrong? “I can’t cook as good as you. You know that!”

 

“No, I don’t. You just keep on saying that. Come on. You can do this.” He pecks the back of my neck, hugs me shortly and strolls over to the fridge to get out our dough we made a few days ago. It has become all puffy now and doubled, if not even tripled its size. It is very soft, almost viscous, and full with big gas bubbles from the yeast and it smells…incredibly stunning. Wow. What a little flour and yeast can do. 

 

I look at him with a surprised beam. “Look! We created a baby!” He snorts. “Yeah. And it wants to be baked.” 

 

“Okay. What should I do?”

 

“Half the dough to make another Hanji Extra and then spread it out on a baking tray. I already oiled it.”

 

“That’s all?” 

 

“Almost. Add tomato sauce, mozzarella and some olives.” He points at the glasses and cheese on the kitchen counter. 

 

“Okay.” I repeat and use a spatula to get about half of the dough out of the box and onto our baking tray. “Do I have to be careful with the dough?”

 

“Yes, try not to squish too many of the bubbles in it.” He shows me how to spread out the soft dough properly before he lets me do the work. “And then just add the rest.”

 

To my surprise the second part turns out to be the most challenging task, but mainly, because he cuddles me again from behind and blows into my ear and over my neck, whilst telling me that he likes my arse and what he would love to do with it soon. 

 

Unfortunately, or fortunately after all—I can’t really decide—we soon are honoured with Hanji’s knock on our door. “Hey boys!” her cheerful voice echoes from the door. “Safe to come in now?”

 

“Yeah, Hanji,” I say, still trying to concentrate on the mozzarella, since now I get tickled under my armpits. 

 

“Oh, no. You told her before me, as well? Was that why I had to endure this afternoon with her in her best form?”

 

“Erm…” I hum as if I have to think really hard about this one. “Maybe?”

 

He tickles me once more. “You brat.” Hanji snickers at that. “Tch. Don’t get me started on you, shitty glasses. I bet you are a bad influence on him.”

 

“Yeah, sure. I got you two lovebirds an early engagement gift, by the way. Thanks for asking.” She throws something at us with a leer. Another box of condoms… Why did I see this one coming? 

 

I sigh demonstratively and wink at him. “Damn, Levi. Now we have to use them. And I still don’t know how.” 

 

“Bummer,” he chuckles. “Seems I need to show you…” I wrap my arms around his neck and kiss him with almost too much tongue. My hands tug at his shirt and he gropes my arse to lift me up again.

 

“Yuck!” we get interrupted.

 

“But Hanji?” I try with my most innocent voice, still up in the air and tangled around him. He doesn’t even seem to struggle with my weight. “Your considerate present…”

 

“Stop the crap, sweetie” she grins. “And stop that too. It makes me realise I’ve got breasts. And you two don’t. It’s getting too hot in here.” 

 

“No more condom boxes?” Levi orders with a winning growl. Somehow he manages to pull that one off. 

 

“Grrr…maybe?” 

 

“No other sex stuff either!”

 

“Blimey. Oh, well.” Her grin gets wider and almost mischievous before she adds “As you wish.”

 

“Yeah, yeah, you nutbag,” he snarls as he lets me back on the floor again. “Me too.”

 

“Damn. He really told you everything didn’t he? Was the sex good?”

 

“Not your business, Hanji. Remember?” I intervene.

 

“You’re really giving me nothing here? How mean.” She pouts. 

 

“Well” I add. “You can have a go at the donuts I made Levi squish whilst kissing him in the snow. Should be the best donuts you ever had, given all that information I just told you. And they really are the most delicious.” 

 

“I feel so touched.”

 

“I thought so. They must be somewhere in the entrance. Take a pick; it should be more than enough.”

 

She hurries over like a squirrel on nut hunt, nose twitching, eyes beaming and even scurrying a bit. It makes me grin. She apparently has to shoo away Lizzy who made herself a very comfortable bed out of the whole plastic bagged box. 

 

“Was it okay to give her that much information?” I ask Levi, who is still standing behind me. 

 

“It was perfect. It will keep her mind busy for a while. Thank you.”

 

I peck him and turn back to the pizza. “So, can it go into the oven now?”

 

He nods. “Yes, love. It’s perfect.” I think I still have to get used to this. Hearing him call me that makes my stomach heat up instantly. “And while it is baking you can prepare the other one. I’ll set the table meanwhile. But first I’m going to bring those away.” He grabs the box of condoms to bring them into the bedroom. His best friend really has a gift for special presents. 

 

Speaking of which. “Ow my gowwwd, Ewen!” Hanji’s enthusiastic and very muffled cheer calls out to us. “Feef aw amafin’. Fanks!” She has stuffed her mouth with what seems to be one whole cronut with chocolate filling, that must have survived our donut snow massacre the least. 

 

I grin back at her. “Glad you like them, Hanji. Told you, they were great.”

 

She gulps, already reaching for the second pastry. “Would you two like to continue our Dexter session after the pizza? I want to know what happens in season two and maybe it kills a little bit of the hormones flying through the air here. It really makes me twitchy.”

 

“Dexter would be great, yes. Levi?”

 

“Tch. Whatever.”

 

– – – 

 

The next day flies past us in a rush. A short morning cuddle seems too alluring to not give into it today, and as Levi rolls around to snuggle up at my side to rests his head on my chest I can’t bring it over myself to just stand up right away. Not if his gentle arms hug me in such a cosy embrace and his kisses are so tender… 

 

At the tearoom we are in for another active day as it seems. Not many big purchases anymore, the days before Christmas had been leaving everybody fully stocked, but a lot of customers come by to say ‘Hello’, drink a cup of tea with us, and buy some biscuits for themselves or as New Years gifts for friends. So the work hours keep us rather busy again and I check the clock in confusion as Levi comes in around quarter to seven in the evening to pick me up. Work hours really have rushed by.

 

Instead of going right home we accompany Mikasa and Armin to pack me a new bag with additional clothes and stuff. 

 

As strange and slightly uncomfortable as it feels to leave my family ‘behind’ I just wouldn’t do it any other way. I just can’t stay away form him, even if he would be just around the corner. On the contrary—this thought actually would even make it worse. Also it feels like I already live at his place, like it is _our_ home already. Strange how one week can change things so rapidly. 

 

Luckily Mikasa and Armin understand. It would be awful to make them sad because of a reason that makes me so happy that I want to burst. And when time comes we will find a good solution for all four of us—I don’t want to abandon my family in any way. But they have been nothing but supportive and we’ve always known each other too well. They are aware of the fact that it would physically hurt me to be away from him in my free time. 

 

Yeah, that’s typical me. Get all or nothing. If I want something I just do it and jump right into that with more than 100 percent. Even if this means I would have to bash my head against a wall over and over again. I just can’t help it. To make the inevitable change a little bit easier though I decided to not entirely move out at once, not officially, but to effectively spent as much time with him as possible. This means to at least almost live there completely.

 

Levi is shocked when he sees my room and I can’t help but blush a little out of embarrassment at the whole scene. Tidiness really is not my strength, as the sight of my chaotic bedroom proves to me one more time. 

 

A perplex moan escapes my chest, accompanied by a stunned wince. My clothes are still lying around everywhere, exactly where I had left them on Thursday in my feeble attempt to find something nice to wear for him (luckily that went well), and then again on Friday after packing my first bag. My bed is—also—still unmade, socks are scattered around, like thrown confetti, my desk is a battleground of stuff and even a few empty cups and plates are still there. 

 

_I wish the earth would swallow me up right here and now._

 

“You truly weren’t joking when you said I would love your place because I like to clean, were you?” I hear his amused voice.

  
“I didn’t remember it to be this bad anymore.”

 

“Now all the socks flying around everywhere in our living room make sense at last. I was beginning to get worried about a secret sock monster that distributes them when we sleep. Like reversed house elves or something.” Even if I want to kiss him for the mere Harry Potter reference, and even if his chuckle tells me that he is okay with the whole ‘Eren is a chaos freak’ thing my worry doesn’t fade completely and I abashedly rub the back of my head.

 

“Yeah…I always wanted join S.P.E.W. with my sock habit, I guess.” 

 

“What a shame with Fred, huh?”

 

_Oh my god, he is another Fred fan!_ And even if I want to jump out of joy at this fact I also feel the memory of reading the seventh book kick me in the guts again. “Please don’t mention it. It still feels horrible.” And after a short while. “You can wait outside if you want to. Maybe drink some tea with Mika–”

 

“No, I want to see this.”

 

“You want to _clean_ this, don’t you?” I know he does. Even _I_ want it at this point. 

 

“Yes. Very! But watching you disgrace yourself is much more fun.” Now he is glaring up at me with a delighted, evil smirk, leaning against the door frame like he would belong there, and folding his arms in front of his chest as if to show me that he does indeed not intent to move very soon and rather pry on me from the entrance. “Go on.” _Just what I thought._

 

I poke out my tongue at him that just proves how much grown up I truly am. It only makes his expression turn even more smug and finally I decide to just pick up the things I’ll need and pack my bags.

 

“Don’t tell me you have more of these things…” his threatening growl calls out to me as I pick up one of my shirts, and as I turn around I notice the grey in his eyes is flashing up. 

 

I give him a wide, innocent smile “Of course. And correct me if I’m wrong here, but…I thought you liked them?”

 

His scowl shoots invisible darts at me but strangely they don’t feel scary. Quite on the contrary. 

 

“So you’re allowed to do that” I pointed at him with a playful pout “But I’m not allowed to dress as it pleases me? How is that fair?”

 

He laughs. “Come on, love. I want to take you home. Should I help after all?”

 

“No, thanks. I’ll be quick. And I don’t especially want you to see the closet from the inside. It is ugly.”

 

“Tch. I tried to live with Hanji, remember? Haven’t you seen enough of her place already to know I can handle this?”

 

“Maybe. But you sort of roommate broke up…?”

 

“Eren,” he steps closer now as if to calm me down and prove a point. It still feels so good to hear my name rolling on his tongue. Soothing. And alluring at the same time. “Hanji and I couldn’t stand to live at the same place because of our conflictive habits and our wonderful talent to drive each other up the wall. You didn’t see her the other afternoon when she was in her top form and you didn’t have to cope with me in my dark phases yet, when work is overpowering and my clients act like arseholes whose sole purpose seems to be to fuck with me. It is not nice. And trust me when I say I will be the most shittiest person to live with at these times. But it’s not the same with you. With you everything is different.” 

 

It is the longest speech I’ve ever heard to come out of his mouth at once.

 

“Really?” I don’t know why I’m so worried all of the sudden. I’ve never felt ashamed because of my sloppiness before but I am afraid to lose him over this. Even if he promises to like cleaning.

 

“Oh, love! I even enjoy the mornings with you.” His arms are hugging me now and he looks up at me with caring, warm eyes. “Despite the fact that I am a night owl and usually hate to be talked at or just be around people before noon. So please hurry, so I can show you how much I need to have you around. Yes?” The usual offish walls in his gaze are completely gone now and that together with his words relaxes me instantly. 

 

And suddenly his look switches to complete curiousness. “But you honestly have to tell me: How is it even possible for you to find anything in here anyway?”

 

My lips curved up at his question. “I just…do?”

 

“You’re amazing. Did I already tell you that?”

 

“Hm. You did now, didn’t you?”

 

“Guess I did. But please don’t make me kiss you now because you are too adorable. It wouldn’t end well with your family just behind the doors.” 

 

I grin widely, peck his forehead and continue with packing. 


	29. Chapter 29

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Munching onigiri.

Back home we are greeted by Hanji at her door of flat who decides to accompany us upstairs in her never-ending greed for food. First I unpack my bags before we tend to dinner. Levi had made rice balls before he went to pick me up, apparently a special request from Hanji, because _‘onigiri rule’_. They already beg me to be eaten right from the kitchen counter and they look so perfect, that I almost don’t want to touch them at all because it would mean the destruction of such a beautiful thing. They even smell good, even though the rice covers the invisible filling completely. I can scent fish and ginger and it makes my mouth water. 

 

Some day I will cook for him and make him gaze in awe as well. That thought suddenly pops up in my head. I don’t know how long it will take and I don’t care either, but I will do this thing. I want to coddle him too. I’ll have to talk to Armin and Christa.

 

We settle on the couch for eating again and continue watching the next DVD of Dexter while we eat, after Hanji solemnly swore to Levi not to get some soy sauce on the sofa or carpet. 

 

As I pick up one of the pretty triangle shaped white things and sink my teeth into them, I have to close my eyes and hum in delight. He gives me a questioning raise of his eyebrows and as I stuff the rest of the rice ball into my mouth in no time at all he just looks at me and his lips smugly curve upwards.

 

After three more rice balls I’m done. I feel happy as hell, but my stomach hurts. Those beautiful white and innocent looking things really make you underestimate their mass, I guess. 

 

“And I thought the pizza was good!” I let myself fall back against the arm rest with a heavy moan, and Levi seizes the opportunity instantly. He takes the blanket, nestles down against me and pulls the blanket over the both of us. My hands run through his hair at once and I feel his grateful kiss and hum on my chest. This is so nice. His wonderful Levi scent washes over me and my whole body relaxes at it. My stomach makes somersaults out of happiness and my heart wants to slow down and race at the same time. It is a strange sensation but so very comforting that I think this foolish smile will never leave my lips again. “Honestly. What did you put in those things? These are amazing.”

 

He looks up at me. “Actually _you_ made the pizza love. Remember? And concerning the rice balls? Nothing much.” How does he always cook such delicious things and can nonchalantly play it down afterwards? 

 

He sees me rolling my eyes at him, even in the dim light of the TV screen, and grins widely—he actually reminds me of a cat that discovered a mouse running around. “Just only good things. Some tuna, some cheddar, some ginger and mayonnaise, spices…Yummy stuff. You like yummy stuff, don’t you?”

 

I grin back at him and enjoy his deep voice that is so close and vibrates through me. “Oh admit it. You just want to bribe me into staying for good.” 

 

“Is that a bad thing?”

 

“No. As long as you’re not a witch who wants me to poke out a finger every morning to tell if I’m fed well enough to be eaten finally.”

 

He lifts himself from the couch a bit, puts a hand on his heart, and gasps dramatically. “I would never think of such things. But well, since you brought it up it doesn’t seem to be such a bad idea after all.”

 

I thump his ear—it is the closest thing I can reach with my hands still running through his hair and he instantly dashes his hand forward in one of his mean tickle attacks. 

 

_*hic!*_ Oh no, not again! 

 

“Absolutely adorable, love!”

 

“I… _*hic!*_ …I hate you.”

 

“No, you don’t. You said so. Even in–”

 

“Shhhh, boys! Less rambling, Dexter’s talking.” Hanji mumbles with a loud whisper. Of course she can manage to eat one whole rice ball at once whilst already biting into the next one and talking to us at the same time. The onigiri are almost as big as her fist. I don’t really want to know how she manages to do that. 

 

All in all it really seems her worst eating phase is over though. Even I can tell. She still crams everything into her mouth that can fit in there as if she was a human hamster mutant, but she chews a little more slowly and doesn’t eat quite as much anymore. I notice Levi watching her attentively from time to time with a small concerned frown as if to check on her. But he seems more relaxed than he still was a few days ago. And it relieves me too. Apparently holidays for Hanji were truly a necessary thing. 

 

_*hic!*_

 

“Shut up, shitty glasses.” Levi growls and and nudges her with his foot. “I’m at work here.”

 

“Mimimi! I can hear that, Captain Shakespeare. However you two are disturbing my precious experience with my most favourite serial killer here. Would you mind taking your hideously dinky declarations of love to some place else?” 

 

“Tch.”

 

“Sorry Hanji.” _*hic!*_ I grind my teeth in apology and annoyance for yet another hiccup marathon.

 

She giggles. “Well, at least it’s not your fault for being reasonably ticklish like freaking normal people. Unlike one other person we both know.”

 

I half-heartedly cover his free ear that doesn’t rest on my rib cage with a hand. “Isn’t it creepy that he isn’t ticklish at all?” _*hic!*_

 

“You know I still can hear you, don’t you?” His fingers poke my arm pits in another weak attempt and I try to cover his mouth now. “I’m right here!” We hear his muttered protest. 

 

Since I don’t pull away my hand he shrugs his shoulders and begins to lick my palm and fingers, which turns out to be _very_ distracting and a satisfied moan wants to build up in my lungs once more. I take my hand away to pinch his nose and nestle it back in his hair. 

 

Hanji ignores Levi completely and reaches for the next rice ball. “Totally creepy. Glad to hear that at least you are average sweetie, like the rest of us.” 

 

‘ _She’s the one to talk!’_ I think at that with a suppressed grunt. How she manages to eat seven or more of these things without exploding and even still being hungry for more is a mystery I honestly can’t explain—I feel like bursting after only four. Even if I wish I could eat more.

 

Levi’s fingers trail under my shirt again to draw their delicate and all the same strong circles on my skin and it nearly feels as if the whole world around us fades into nothingness. After a while Lizzy joins us and rests down on the top us on, right on his side. 

 

“My, my! What an image.” Hanji snickers after we finished the DVD and she turns around to look at us, with yet another rice ball in her hand. “I guess that’s my cue to leave, huh?”

 

“Tch.” I hear his whinge.

 

“Love you too, grumpy face. By the way, the onigiri truly are delicious today. More than ever. Excelled yourself for someone, hm?” 

 

A flattered warmth spreads through me at her words and his legs carefully intertwine with mine even more. “Oh, shut up, Hanji.”

 

“Wow. Two shut ups in one evening. I feel so touched. Congratulations Eren. He’s a real keeper!”

 

“Yeah, Hanji, I know.” I smile up at her and I hear his silent giggle that makes me feel all fuzzy inside. “But you can stay if you’d like. We could watch some more.”

 

“Nah, better some other day. I’ll leave you two alone for tonight. You’ll be at your shop tomorrow to celebrate New Years Eve, right?” 

 

“We actually decided to move the party to Mikasa’s and Armin’s place, but yes.” 

 

She gives a dramatic sigh at Levi. “Guess I’ll be going alone to Erwin’s party then, huh?” 

 

“Mh.” His affirmative grumble comes from behind the blanket. “I’m not going to leave this guy alone. No chance that I will end up kissing you again for New Years. Or even worse…”

 

“You could do much worse than me, you know that?”

 

“No second time for me with you, thank you. But if you finally think you deserve something good for yourself you should go for it. I think Moblit wouldn’t mind. For me it’s much better this way.” His lowered voice sounds sleepy and I think tomorrow might even end up in us going back here after a few hours of celebrating and kip through all the fireworks.

 

“Yeah, right. Me and Moblit. No fucking way!” Hanji’s hyper offended snort seems a bit artificial and makes me look at her, only to notice a slight blush. 

 

“Do I hear a little bit too much denial there?” A heavy but quiet chuckle on my chest tells me I hit the nail on the head. “Want me to give you condoms for New Year’s Hanji?” 

 

Now he is laughing out loud and I let my hands massage his head once more. 

 

“Oh, shut up, sweetie. You’re becoming even worse than him! His faults already rub off on you, huh?” She theatrically points at Levi now. “Shame on you, mister. Shame!” And she stands up to walk to the door, hands on her hips and now obviously flustered. 

 

“Good night Hanji.”

 

“Yeah, yeah.”

 

“Have a nice party tomorrow. Kiss Moblit from us.” He calls after her with a lazy wave and hugs me again after the door falls into its lock behind her. 

 

“Oh no, I guess we scared her away!”

 

He shuffles a bit until he faces me completely with his arms resting at my sides and kisses me. “God, I love you.”

 

I wink at him. “Eren is still enough. Thank you.” 

 

“Tch. Smart-arse.” 

 

Lizzy, just pushed away by his turning around miaows in complain and jumps back onto the couch to snuggle up at our feet. _So cosy._

 

“Do you really want to come with me tomorrow?” I ask him, one of my hands in his hair and the other one holding his face with my fingers caressing his cheeks and jaw. “I would be happy to have you with me.”

 

“Tch. Of course I’ll be there. Never going to let you go alone if I can be there with you. Anyway, I have to catch up two years, you know?”

 

“Hm.” I kiss him back to tell him how thankful I am. “Me too.”

 

“We are so fucking stupid.” His thumb carefully strokes over my bottom lip and leaves it behind prickling, lonely, and longing for more.

 

“We _were_ so stupid. That’s a difference.”

 

“Fortunately.” And he leans down to make my mind go dizzy with a deep, gentle kiss.

 

\- - - 

 

It is New Years Eve and shortly before closing time. After having a somewhat busy first half hour the noon has been more or less quiet again and as 2 pm draws closer the flood of costumers has almost dried out completely. It is a rather short day for us, with opening hours from 11 am till the early afternoon and the prospect of another completely free day tomorrow, one whole day with him, is a nice one. Especially since we had a few very weird or at least challenging shoppers today. 

 

One customer came in and thought we were a tea room—as in coffee bar, just with tea. It took us a while to explain to her that we indeed offer brewed tea to our customers, but that it is a gesture of politeness and a chance for our customers to actually try the tea that we sell, ruling out the possibility that they will end up with something they might not like. She drank a cup with a dark scowl (not nearly as attractive and lovable as Levi’s in my opinion) and stepped out without a goodbye. A regular who was in at the same time just shook her head and laughed afterwards what brightened up the gloomy mood again instantly.

 

Then there was a customer that we indeed recognised from a few months back. She wanted to buy a tea that she had bought back then and liked, but couldn’t tell anymore which one it had been, because she had thrown the bag away. This happens more often than one might think and we are always glad to help. This time however consulting turned out to be rather intense. 

 

After going through the difference between oolong tea, black tea, pu erh, white tea and—just out of curiosity, because this option turned out to be off the table anyway—the difference between Japanese and Chinese green teas, we tried to narrow down the possibilities of what tea she wanted. Which turned out to be quite hard, because she couldn’t entirely remember, and always trailed off in her thoughts, so we had to start at the beginning for a few times. 

 

Luckily we found something that either was indeed the same tea or at least another one she really liked, an aromatic oolong, and she happily bought a bag. 

 

When she had left after a whole hour of occupying all three of us we sighed in relief and Armin went to the back to get out the Go En again, which we shared with a very friendly ginger-haired woman, who introduced herself as Petra and a friend of Levi’s. She stayed for a while, praised our shop, and left with a few boxes of biscuits and a lovable smile.

 

Another customer wanted to have some very bad quality tea and didn’t understand why we don’t sell those. We excused ourselves and recommended friendly to go to the next tea shop a few minutes down the road at the shopping centre which probably would have it in its assortment. But he went on rambling about bad service and that it would be rude that we apparently didn’t want to sell him anything. When we politely mentioned that we had another version of the tea he preferred but just in a little better quality he accused us to only be after his money and stormed out with a lot of loud and discourteous curses that made Mikasa’s eyes glow very dangerously. 

 

After two years of dealing with all kinds of people we meet in here, Mikasa’s impulsive temper has calmed down a bit and we all have become a little bit better in feeling the room when strangers enter. But sometimes her spirit wants to rise up again and rave like a madman. 

 

By now 2 pm has arrived and my phone buzzes to announce an incoming text message. 

 

**From: Ymir  
hey you dorks! looking forward for seeing your sorry arses again tonight. should we bring anything, dear hosts?**

 

I switch the buzz off completely, knowing the whole text avalanche will start from a new. 

 

**From: Ymir  
uh, and eren. please tell me your precious honeybun will be joining us. i know i’ve seen him before but i still can’t wait to pry on him. **

 

**From: Reiner  
Looking forward to tonight too. Bertl made quiche, we’ll bring some.**

 

Yup. Just as I thought… 

 

**From: Berthold  
** **And one extra for Sasha?**

 

**From: Connie  
** **omg eren has a honeybun now the date went well huh? gz**

 

 I sigh. And the Christmas holidays apparently have thrown Connie right back into mmorpg mode, I guess. Missing punctuation marks and shortenings, along no capitals are a first undeniable evidence. I tip on another big session of World of Warcraft. Connie adores his blood elf and thrives in spending his precious hours being alive in Undercity, chatting with his old guild members, running around and doing nothing, except cheering for his Lurky critter.

 

**From: Sasha  
I love you, Berthold!**

 

**From: Connie  
i feel kind of offended here**

 

**From: Sasha  
But…food. And I still love you the most.**

 

**From: Ymir  
** **we love you too cupcake.**

 

**From: Jean  
Oh, not again!**

 

**From: Connie  
whassup jean?**

 

**From: Jean  
You guys suck!**

 

**From: Ymir  
look who’s talking.**

 

**From: Marco  
Be nice, guys. Please?**

 

**From: Ymir  
i am always nice. just stating facts. right, jean-boy?**

 

**From: Jean  
Nu-huhh!! **

 

**From: Ymir  
uh-huhhh!**

 

**From: Jean  
Roar! **

 

**From: Ymir  
ROAR! **

 

**From: Ymir  
** **oh btw, my sweet baby girl would make her precious sweet potato pie.**

 

I roll my eyes. These guys and their message overload. Every god damn time! Better answer before this will assume alarming proportions.

 

**From: Eren  
Anything you like, guys. Pie and quiche would be nice. Thank you very much. **

 

**From: Ymir  
sweet. i’ll tell her so she can start doing her magic.**

 

**From: Reiner  
Perfect. Connie? Sasha? Should we pick you up again?**

 

**From: Connie  
** **splendid thx**

 

**From: Reiner  
Not with that attitude, young man! I don’t care how quadrangular your eyes are from all that online gaming of yours, gimping in Azeroth or where the hell I know what’s hot these days. Show a little respect with that writing. (Sasha, this does not concern you—or the extra quiche. We’re looking forward to seeing you tonight, honey.)**

 

**From: Sasha  
Yay! Thank you, Reiner.**

 

**From: Connie  
Yes, Bwana. Sorry, for the troubles my prior messages have caused you and your fellow citizens. My dear wife and I would be very happy if you could pick us up if convenient, your wonderful and inspiring Highness. Thank you very much. We will be expecting you in time and kiss your hand if it pleases you. Yours truly, Connie Springer.**

 

**From: Reiner  
Good boy. And you even quoted ‘Hatari!’ along a marvellous trash anime. I’m so proud. Papa Reiner’s always glad to help.**

 

**From: Jean  
** **Yuck.**

 

**From: Ymir  
** **and for once jean and i agree over texts. yo eren, you still there? still want my answer.**

 

**From: Jean  
** **Fuck. I think I’ll have to flee the country now…**

 

**From: Marco  
(:**

 

**From: Ymir  
…**

 

**From: Ymir  
…?**

 

**From: Ymir  
???**

 

**From: Ymir  
you know I can keep this up all fucking day, eren. and i will. i want my answer. or else i’ll text him myself. muhaha!**

 

She and Hanji would be such great friends… I don’t know if this is a good thing or something bad. 

 

**From: Eren  
As I know you, you already did anyway. And yes, he’ll be there.**

 

**From: Ymir  
pshh. i’m so offended right now…**

 

**From: Ymir  
** **okay, you’ve got me. of course i did just now. but yay!**

 

Of course she did. 

 

**From: Christa  
** **Oh, Ymir…**

 

**From: Ymir  
yes, baby girl?**

 

**From: Ymir  
oh, btw guys. can you bring me a new cup? need a new one…**

 

This woman. That’s the third one she went through this month alone. It’s a new record, I think and I hear Mikasa’s troubled sigh in the background, as well as a pitiful snicker from Armin.

 

**From: Armin  
** **Yes, Ymir. We will.**

 

**From: Ymir  
** **Thank you, Armin! I’ll be in your debt forever.**

 

I just want to start to text Levi to find out if I have to do some damage control as the door bell rings and he steps in himself, hands deep in his pockets and obviously offended by the low temperatures.

 

“Hi Mikasa, hello Armin!”

 

“Hi, you.” I put my phone away and kiss him hello. His coat and face are cold, even after this short walk. 

 

“Hi, love. I missed you. Are you ready to leave?” 

 

Armin pours him a cup of tea we still have left from our adventurous tea search earlier, that he takes with a grateful thanks.

 

“Yes, just wait a second, please. I’ll get my things,” I go back behind the register again and move on to the personnel department to fetch my coat and cap, before turning to Mikasa and Armin. “We’ll come over round 5 pm. Or should we be there earlier?”

 

With the party starting at 6 pm I wanted to first go home and change, before helping with the preparations.

 

“No, thank you Eren. Around 5 pm would be perfect—there isn’t so much left to do.”

 

I hug them goodbye, take Levi’s hand and we leave for home. 

 

“How was your day?” he asks as we step out. 

 

A chuckle escapes my chest. “Luckily short. I met your friend Petra today.”

 

“Oh, was she here?”

 

“Yes, to buy some biscuits for Erwin’s party tonight as it seems. She’s lovely. How was your day?”

 

“Very interesting.”

 

“Oh, yeah?” I think I know in which direction this is going to go. “Got some weird text messages I guess?” After a curious look of him I add. “She texted me too. I knew she probably would have saved your number last week when she hacked my phone.”

 

“It was like texting with a second Hanji.” Texting with her? He answered?

 

“That’s what I thought.” I laugh. “What did she write?”

 

“That you were her sweet sugar daddy and I should make sure you’d get all the sweet lovin’ and seme vampire sex bites you obviously deserved.” 

 

I groan. She had to play the yaoi card…

 

“I answered her that I didn’t know who she was because I didn’t have her number, and asked where she got mine.”  


 

“Let me guess.  _I’m a wizard, Harry?_ ”

 

“Exactly. Then she asked if I would be there tonight so she could check if I really am—let me quote again—‘proper wife material’ for you.”

 

“Oh no!”

 

“Oh, yes,” he chuckles. “I told her ‘As you wish’.” 

 

I stop walking and gape at him. 

 

“That’s when the messages stopped.” 

 

Laughter, that I can not hold back, breaks out of me. “You Westleyed her? Ymir must have been thrilled.”

 

“Westleyed?” I hear the puzzled frown of his eyebrows already in his question.

 

“I’ll explain later. ‘The Princess Bride’, page 64, I guess.” I search for my phone in my pockets and take a look at the display. 

 

**From: Ymir  
sweet eren. you chose wisely. or was it westley? can’t remember. anyway. phone five! love ya, you loser.  <3**

 

A heart from Ymir. Well, that was a first! 

 

“Yup. Look at that,” I giggle. “She adores you already.”

 

“Well, I’m a lucky man.”


	30. Chapter 30

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> New Year’s Eve.

“You’re honestly going to wear this?”

 

He has put on one of his diabolic shirts along his suit and grins at me knowingly. “Yes. We’re going out tonight and I want you to be proud. Look nice, you know?”

 

I grin back. “Hm.”

 

“Hm?”

 

“Okay.” I give in and have to admit to actually enjoy the startled irritation in his look.

 

“Okay?”

 

“Yes.” Before he can ask anything I kiss him and start to change myself. 

 

Two can play this game and I _might_ have gone shopping yesterday. The fridge had almost bled out completely during the last days with Hanji being here most of the time, so I had to go out to buy fresh groceries anyway – especially regarding the upcoming bank holiday. 

 

Afterwards I went to Petra’s and Erwin’s shop to tell them that I wouldn’t be joining Erwin’s New Year’s Eve party. 

 

Petra – bless her soul for being a grown-up human being that actually is a little bit smaller than me – was overly joyous to hear the reason why I wouldn’t be there tonight and hugged me tightly. Erwin hit me on my shoulder so hard that I thought I would sink into the ground. 

 

After a short talk in which they tried to interrogate me about Eren, I enquired Petra about a job I would like her to do for me. We already had been working together for a study project once during our training and I adore her work. So I wouldn’t let anybody else do it, if it would be possible this way. I smile at the thought that she obviously couldn’t help herself and go to the Tearoom  today after she had come over to drop off her project this noon.

 

Afterwards I went to the next shop to try to find some clothes for tonight. I never had been one to be insecure about my outfit, but I knew already we would be celebrating with his friends – or at least his family. Also I thought it would be time to surprise him for a change. And his zoned-out demeanour right now is telling me…

 

_Jackpot!_

 

When I slip into my new white button-up shirt and black pants with a provocative wink his eyes hungrily flash over my body and as I reach for my own casual suit jacket he shakes his head as if in an attempt to clear it.

 

_Time to play it cool._ “What is it, love? Do I look stupid?”

 

“You’re doing this on purpose, aren’t you?”

 

I blink at him. “Doing what?”

 

“This.” He points at me and I deliberately frown my eyebrows in dramatic, dark confusion. 

 

“Should I undress again? It would be humiliating for a social gathering though. And so cold. You’d have to warm me… Besides. I thought we’re going out tonight and I want you to be proud. Look nice, you know?”

 

“Oh, you evil bastard,” he snickers. “Don’t quote me on this. And stop that ignorant facade.”

 

“Hm. So glad you like it. This evening will be so much fun!”

 

“Okay. I’ll wear a tie then.” _Oh, love… you won’t win this one._

 

I smugly beam at him, unfolding my black tie I got with the new suit. “Oh, you too?” He grinds his teeth in response and pokes out his tongue at me. It looks so adorable, that I have to step closer to peck him shortly as I wrap the black tie around my neck. “We can leave for home any time we want later, you know? But before that I intend to have a great time with you and celebrate properly.” He truly is beautiful with the light dancing in his ruffled-as-always hair, making it shine, and little dust stars glitter around him in the air, stirred up by his movements. And he is all mine to look at.

 

“I’d rather want to stay here and do naughty stuff with you…” His eyes are literally glistening with tiny sparks right now. And to be totally honest, this admiring gaze and his hands that caress my butt do amazing wonders for my dick.

 

“It’s _your_ party, love. We’re going! And wait until I put on my cologne, that you like so much.”

 

Even if his chocked moan encourages me to banter him even further I decide to let it go for now and move into the kitchen to tend to the apple cake I baked for tonight. 

 

As if the smell of food had lured her upstairs once more that’s the moment in which Hanji’s knock sounds on the door, announcing her entry. 

 

I knew, why I made two cakes at once.

 

“Hi boys,” she cheers. “I wanted to hug you goodbye and wish you a happy New Year before Moblit will be coming over to pick me up and you will leave. Wow, so fancy!” She doesn’t mean us apparently, going with her chirping sounds right now and Lizzy purring so loudly at her crawling, that it echoes all the way from the entry to me. “Got yourself dressed-up nicely for the big night, girl? All in black. And you even washed between your cute, little stinky-toesies? That’s so great. Tell me more.”

 

“Hi Hanji. I made you some cake to take to Erwin’s. Do you think it will survive the drive?” 

 

“Is this your Levi special flat apple cake with cardamom and cream? Only time will tell. You know I could munch it in my sleep… Oh, hello Eren.”

 

“Hello Hanji,” he greets back. “You look so nice. Brought your A-game, huh?”

 

She really does look unusually elegant today. Her glasses are gone, probably replaced by contacts because without correction she is blind like a bat, she wears a green dress, and even her typically messy hair is floating around her. It must have taken her hours to accomplish that. Moblit will definitely be in for a surprise. 

 

“Thanks, sweetie. But look at you two! So posh.” She already has her phone in her hand to snapshot us. Why did I see this coming? 

 

Eren hugs me from behind now and I lean into his embrace. I will never get enough of this, it just feels too good. “Do you have a driver to come back home Hanji? Or should we pick you up later?” 

 

He is always so considerate. It makes my heart melt and I gratefully squeeze his arms that are wrapped around me. 

 

“No, sweetie, but thank you. Moblit will take me home again.”

 

“To _your_ home?” I hear the leer in his amiable voice and have to grin myself.

 

“We’ll see,” she answers with a giggle. “Anyway. Have a nice night, you two. I will take this…”

 

“Don’t drool on the cake, Hanji, or you’ll have to–”

 

“Eat it myself? Damn!” She boxes my shoulder, pecks Eren on the cheek and leaves with the spring form tin after saying goodbye to Lizzy as well. 

 

“You even made cake?” His arms hug me a little tighter. “Is that the reason why it smells so lovely in here?”

 

The scent of freshly baked apples, spices and short pastry really still clings to the air. Sweet, endearing, comforting and like home. It reminds me of him. “Of course I did.”

 

“Thank you. You didn’t have to, though, you know.”

 

“Ah, well. It’s an easy recipe. And I wanted to.”

 

“Thanks.”

 

“You’re welcome, love. Should we go?”

 

“Yes.”

 

\- - - 

 

Eren rings the bell as we stand in front of Mikasa’s and Armin’s door. It is almost as if he wanted to tell me he doesn’t live there anymore. Not completely anyway. It is always small things like this that make my stomach do crazy things. Like silly somersaults. Or going all twitchy. Or turning warm and making it feel kind of churning. Or all at once. Like right now. And to stop myself from becoming all too emotional because of that I wrinkle my eyebrows in a louring frown. 

 

“Stop with that,” he chuckles. “It’s too sexy. I want to eat you up if you do that.”

 

_Damn it._ That does it for me and I smile up at him. “You’re such a strange man. Let me ask you again. Are you sure, you’re real?”

 

“Tch.”

 

“My line, remember?” 

 

He bumps me with his hip, just as Mikasa opens the door to greet us happily. “Hi Eren, hello Levi. Come in, please. Thanks for being here early.”

 

“You’re welcome, sis. Hi.” He hugs her and hands her a bottle of cooled champagne, before saying hello to Armin who joins us in the wardrobe.

 

“Hey, you two.”

 

“Hi.” I greet them back and find myself in two strangely familiar hugs that Eren comments with a beam. “How can we help with the preparations?”

 

She grins. “There really isn’t that much left to do, since our messy roommate moved out this week.” This is commented by a playfully offended snort on his side and a twitching of my lips on mine. “But you could join Armin in the kitchen while Eren helps me in our living room?”

 

“Of course. This comes in the kitchen as well, I guess?” I lift up the cake. 

 

“Yeah, we’ll be having some kind of buffet.” Armin answers and I follow him. “How nice that you baked for us. Apple cake?”

 

“Yes, with cardamom.”

 

“Perfect.”

 

The kitchen counter is already filled with food. I spot green salads, a bowl with lentils, some plates filled with baked and filled puff pastry, a basket with bread and a chocolate cake. The dining table is neatly set and decorated, and the radio is playing Tegan and Sara’s ‘On Directing’ in the background.

 

A pot with vegetables is cooking on the stove and the oven is working on a roast of some kind. Pork apparently. 

 

“Could you purée and taste the soup please, Levi? Then I can prepare the dressings for the salad and finish the gravy.”

 

“Yes, sure. What spices should I use?”

 

“Thank you. Anything you’d like that you can find on top of the exhaust hood and salt and pepper are right next to the stove. Would you also add the can of coconut milk, please? The hand blender is in the second-top drawer to your left.”

 

As I purée the content of the pot and pour in the coconut milk I spot yellow lentils and what I guess to be sweet potatoes. It smells lovely. There isn’t much seasoning left to do, I just add a little more salt and pepper. “How many guests are you expecting?” I could count the set seats at the table, but conversation with Armin feels easy. 

 

“Well, Jean and Marco will be coming, along with Ymir and Christa. You’ve met them once before, I think? Ymir can be a badass but she’s actually really sweet.”

 

“Yes, I know Ymir,” I chuckle. “She also texted me today. What a nice lady.”

 

Armin sighs “She really can’t help herself. Luckily Christa mostly manages to balance her out. I’m sorry for whatever she might have written to you.”

 

“Don’t be. Honestly. I’ve spent my life with Hanji, so I’ve been prepared.” 

 

He laughs kindly in response. “I’m glad about that.” I make space for him so he can get the roast out of the oven. I was right, it is a pork roast with crackling. “And then we’ll be having five more friends over that I think you haven’t met yet as far as I know. Connie and Sasha, and Annie, Reiner, and Berthold.”

 

“I heard of them. Sasha is the one that likes to eat, isn’t she?”

 

“Yes, that’s our Sasha.”

 

“Wow, Armin, it smells lovely in here!” Eren’s voice calls from the hallway. “I hope, you didn’t exhaust yourself with all of this. We really could have come earlier.”

 

“No, Eren. Don’t worry. Mikasa made the cake yesterday while I was preparing the lentil salad and the rest almost did itself today.”

 

The door bell rings. “That must be Annie, Berthold and Reiner with Connie and Sasha. They are always early” Armin assumes and we move out of the kitchen to join Mikasa in the entrance.

 

In come two women. One with amiable crow’s feet around her sparkling eyes, brown hair, and an opened bag of crisps in her hand. Sasha, obviously. The other woman is blond, looking as grim as me on my good days and – praise the Lord, there is another one out there – smaller than me. They are accompanied by three men, one so obviously muscular that all my senses scream at me to build myself up in front of him and hit him with my most scary, poisonous glare – which I don’t, but the urge is still strong as fuck – another one who is as dark-haired as the other is blond and he intimidates me no less with his height. A fucking big arse tree… I guess even Mike and Erwin aren’t _that_ tall. The third man is about my height and clearly a lively character, already jumping around and laughing all the time.

 

“You must be Levi,” the muscleman greets me with a winning smile and embraces me in a hug that is so tight that I fear my eyes will pop out. “I’m Papa Reiner. You can drop the ‘Papa’ though. It’s so great to meet you.” He lets go of me and I am glad to be able to catch my breath again. Eren besides me giggles.

 

_And I thought I was strong…_

 

“This is my Bertl,” he points proudly at the giant and then at the blond woman “and this is our Annie.”

 

“Hello.” I really don’t know what else to say with my still short breathing.

 

“Hi.” Bertl, or Berthold, greets me friendly and shakes my hand. Annie and I nod at each other and shorty after that I am finding myself in another embrace. Not this tight this time, luckily. 

 

”Hello Levi, I’m Sasha. Happy to finally meet you. Armin told me you like to cook?”

 

“Sasha!” The man that must be Connie sighs. “Don’t scare him away right at the first sight.” And he turns to me to shake my hand as well. “I’m Connie. Hey! She’s right though. We are happy to finally meet you in person.” 

 

“Hi. Don’t mind, Connie. I’ve got a hungry caterpillar of myself at home.” 

 

He answers with a cheerful chuckle.

 

“That’s right.” Mikasa says. “Where is Hanji today anywhere? I hope she has somewhere to go? She could have joined us otherwise…”

 

“No, she’s perfectly fine where she is, thank you Mikasa. She’s with friends.” I think about Moblit. “And she probably wouldn’t want it any other way.”

 

“So. Where’s the food? Kitchen?” Sasha calls out and already is on her way, leaving crisps crumbs behind her as if she was Gretel and had to mark her way back home. “It smells so nice Armin.”

 

“Thank you, Sasha.”

 

“Quiche.” Annie says with a faint blush and hands Armin a pie form. She doesn’t seem to be a woman of words, but doesn’t appear to be particularly unfriendly. Just short-spoken. 

 

“Thank you. Wow, Berthold, that looks good. Should we put it in the oven once more to warm it up?”

 

“Only if you’d like to,” comes the answer from way above my head. “It’s done already.”

 

“Perfect.”

 

The door bell rings again and Eren lets the guests in with a buzz on the door. “That must be the rest. Prepare for The Ymir.”

 

“…don’t see what you’re complaining about” A deep and familiar voice echoes up the stairs. “Yes it’s fucking cold outside with no clouds in winter but you can watch the sky this way. The stars are fucking adorable in December.”

 

“Blah-blah-blah, tell me something I don’t know mister grumpy-face.” We hear Ymir’s booming laughter. And now they are standing in front of the door. “Oi people! Glad to be here and being able to take my precious baby girl out tonight. Thanks for the invite! Hi Mikasa, hi Armin. Here is some wine, and Christa’s famous sweet potato pie, along some money for my cup supplies. Eren? I see all the sex does you good? You look so hot, you dork.” He sighs dramatically as she boxes his arm and takes her into a head lock with a chuckle.

 

“Ymir! I’m so sorry Levi,” Christa begs apologetically. “And again for this noon as well.”

 

I hug her. It is always nice to hug kind people that are smaller than you for a change. “Hi Christa. Don’t mind. Hanji says hello to you.”

 

“That’s right! You’ve got one of your own at home.” She grins. 

 

Marco shakes my hand. “Hello Levi, nice to see you again.” His big brown eyes show nothing but honesty and pure friendliness. I really have to get used to that as it seems. “We brought some flowers for you Mikasa, where should I put them?”

 

“I’ll fetch you a vase, thank you, Marco. They are beautiful.” She says and takes him with her into the living room.

 

“Hey,” Jean harrumphs at us. I know him well enough by now, that I see he means well. So I smile back with a nod and his darksome countenance loosens up a bit with a pleasant sparkle in his eyes. 

 

“Well, guys.” Armin’s cheer drowns out the already jolly chattering. “Not that it would be surprising news, but Sasha’s starving already. So let’s eat! Shall we?”

 

Eren takes my hand to link his fingers with mine and we make our way into the kitchen.

 

\- - - 

 

The food is delicious. 

 

Christa’s sweet potato pie with olive oil, garlic, and rosemary breadcrumbs tastes like Heaven on earth, the quiche is amazing and once again Armin’s cooking is marvellous. 

 

The chatter and jolliness doesn’t stop and I enjoy myself as much around people as I haven’t done in years. Jean raves over the Daredevil and Bloodline series on Netflix he apparently has watched with Marco over the last past weeks and is delighted to hear that we have continued Dexter and still like it. 

 

Ymir is openly doting so much over Christa that she actually forgets to let her mischievous side go wild and Connie just seems happy to not having to be concerned about feeding Sasha for one day. As it seems she especially likes the bread and soup. Even Annie loosens up, sitting next to Armin who is talking to her eagerly and actually making her smile from time to time, while Reiner’s contagious laughter echoes over the table. He seems to be a very rough guy with a very big and caring heart,… and a very strange taste in TV entertainment.

 

After a while Eren is done with eating and rests his head on my shoulder with a sigh. I squeeze his fingers under the table and let my thumb brush over the back of his hand. I am so happy right now that it almost feels as if my heart wants to jump right out of my chest and that’s even before he nuzzles even closer. I let go of his hand and wrap my arm around him to run my fingers through his soft hair.

 

Strangely enough the whole scene doesn’t feel like sitting in a round filled with (almost) strangers. It feels so oddly comfortable as if I’ve always belonged to their group. They don’t pester me with questions about myself or our relationship and just seem to accept things the way they are. It is nice and I am grateful. 

 

But with him snuggling up so closely his scent floods my senses. It makes my whole body cringe out of pure want. I am hyper-aware of his presence next to me and his hand that wanders under my jacket and over my back doesn’t especially help. It makes my skin prickle. My fingertips tingle and want to do so much more than ‘just’ caressing his hair.

 

I can sense his breathing, flooding in and our of his body and brushing against my shoulder, when it leaves him. It tickles me even through the collar of my shirt and I get goosebumps. I feel the patterns of his fingers on my back and am sure he just drew a heart. 

 

If I could actually melt this would be it for me. And I wouldn’t even regret it. _He is so wonderful._

 

I try to focus on the conversations around me but it does not work. Not even a bit. 

 

All I can think about is him. And I want him to know.

 

And so I lower my hand and let it trail over his ear. After all it just is there, in open daylight (or at least in open light) and nobody stops me. I need him to know that I want to taste him, show him how I feel, too. That I want to kiss him. Tenderly, fiercely… everything. Or just take off all of our clothes and throw him on the bed, right in his alluring suit that – also – does not really help my whole situation. 

 

He winces slightly under my touch and I struggle to keep my face calm. He thumps my back in return, hence I repeat the stroke and now he his pinching my arse. This man truly drives me crazy.

 

I suppress a sigh. I risk a glance at him, aware of the fact that he presumably will look back and probably seduce me with his bright eyes, without even knowing what he does to me. 

 

_Yup. Just as I thought. Damn these bloody social gatherings! They really can suck sometimes._

 

I could just stand up and go to his room. Or his bathroom. _No_ , I correct myself, _the_ bathroom. It is not his. Not anymore. He almost moved out completely.

 

He shuffles away again with a shy grin and a slight blush to sit up in his chair, his hand searching for mine once more. _Such a brat!_ He really does have no clue how all of this makes my blood rush, does he? My heart is already racing a full marathon and my pants are becoming tight again. 

 

_“You started this, old man, now deal with it!”_ My brain screams at me. My dick on the other hand congratulates me. _“Great!”_ It cheers. _“So smooth! Go for it!”_ And my heart just wants to burst, completely lost for words. 

 

“Hey, you two, get a room!” Ymir suddenly bursts out laughing, interrupting all the thoughts any part of my body can come up with. I glare back at her and… just earn a wide grin in response. 

 

_Isn’t my glare good anymore? I put everything in there I could master to come up with. Has it become weak?_

 

_No, apparently not,_ as Connie’s suddenly very pale face is telling me and I hurry to let it go. If it doesn’t have the intended effect on the right person it’s meaningless anyway. The aim of my choice just chuckles, her freckles dancing all over her cheeks and pokes out her tongue at us. “Okay, everybody. Gift haul! I hereby pronounce it opened. Jean, you start!”

 

“Why me?”

 

“Because someone has to. And you’re my lucky victim today. Feel worshipped, please. And now go.”

 

He groans heavily before giving in. “I got the new Tomb Raider from my parents and Marco gave me a new beany, a box of biscuits, and a board game that you can play as two. It’s with a panda… so fucking adorable. Thanks again, sweetheart. I love it!”

 

“You’re welcome, Jean.” Marco smiles warmly. 

 

Ymir smirks. “Aaand?” 

 

“Fuck. You really know everything, huh?” Jean scowls at her with a threatening frown and a growl. Even I couldn’t have done it better.

 

“I can only repeat that I’m a wizard so many times until one of you believes me. When will you people finally accept it? Now come on Jean-boy, don’t be shy. Share the fun!”

 

His voice becomes very quiet and low as he mumbles. “And coupons.”

 

“What kind of coupons?” That woman really is something. 

 

Clearly both of them didn’t tell her. Jean blushes all the way up to his ears and Marco follows suit to burst out. “Okay, okay. I gave him sexy coupons for cuddling and stuff. It was the least I could do after the plane tickets to London that he gave to me.” I didn’t think Jean could blush even more but apparently I was wrong. “Happy, Ymir?”

 

“Yes, honey.” she beams. “See? Wasn’t that hard, huh? And no need to be embarrassed you two. I’m glad you love each other. Lord knows you’re both as lucky as one can get.”

 

At this I feel Eren’s hand squeeze mine and his head leaning over to rest on my shoulder again. I turn a little to kiss his forehead.

 

“I agree with that last part.” Reiner calls out. 

 

“Thank you Reiner. You’re next!” Ymir raises her glass of water in his direction. 

 

“Bertl gave me a new apron since the last one caught fire. It is so beautiful. It even has frills and…” he freezes in the middle of his exited speech, leaving the room silent. “…ahem, don’t ask.” he manages to conclude.

 

“I will investigate, Papa. You know that. And Bertl I notice your sweating. I know something’s up.”

 

“Yeah…” Reines moans in obvious defeat and is saved by Sasha who enthusiastically intervenes as if she couldn’t keep it in any longer.

 

“Connie gave me a week worth’s ration of potato chips and bread that I could store in the freezer and crisp up whenever I like. And from my mother I got an ugly shelf sitter and a guidebook about ‘trouble in marriage’. So considerate of her, really. So… loved the food hate the latter.”

 

“A guidebook about ‘trouble in marriage’, Sasha?” Marco’s soft voice sounds concerned. “Do you and Connie–”

 

She snorts. “Yeah. My mother wishes.” Connie sighs like an old man that has been challenged by life itself. 

 

“Wow, Sasha. Your mother really is a doll, huh?” Ymir laughs. 

 

Connie brightens up again. “Oh yeah. She got me a guidebook about how to deal with being short.”

 

Sweet. Now it’s my turn to chuckle. “Well it still is better than a box of condoms from your neighbour.” Eren giggles, his head still snuggled agains my shoulder, and at everybody’s stunned gaze I simply shrug and add “Hanji.”

 

“Guess you could use them though.” Ymir leers. Eren was right. Like two peas in a pod those two. But before I can answer her she winks cheekily and turns back to Connie. “Don’t mind that book, bald head. And wow, you really _are_ short, never noticed that before.” Annie laughs and throws her napkin at Ymir, who laughs back. “And yet here we are. Loving you. What else did you get, Con?”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The wonderful music by [Tegan and Sara](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XHbSq7HAPF4).
> 
> The apron is a reference to [this fic](http://archiveofourown.org/works/1077053/chapters/2163538).


	31. Chapter 31

It’s a little after 10 pm and we are on our way home. Leaving the party had become necessary after finding myself pinning Eren against the wall of their corridor once again, in a passionate kiss that had even made Ymir blush, when she surprised us unintentionally on her way to the bathroom. She just giggle screamed as she hurried away in a haste and Eren mentioned between his heavy breaths it may be reasonable to just go to be alone again.

 

I agreed to that wise plan, and a few minutes later we had said our goodbyes and New Year’s wishes, and were out of the house. 

 

It had been a nice evening. They had cleared their living room to make space for some sort of small dance floor adjacent to a lounge corner. Reiner and Berthold turned out to be quite into professional dancing and Ymir needed a lot of room around her too, because she dragged up Christa and Marco in turns and whirled them around dangerously with joyful cheers. Her favourite show though was the Pulp Fiction dance – her part being John Travolta’s of course. 

 

Eren and I had been spending the evening on one of the couches talking to Jean and Marco (if he wasn’t currently a designated dance partner) and Connie and Sasha, who – even after declaring to be stuffed after dinner – bounced into the kitchen from time to time to get herself a refill of her choice until the food was almost entirely gone. 

 

Marco was curious about London and asked about tips where to go to, and was glad we could recommend them a few places, like Foyles, Liberty’s, Borough Market and Bricklane Market, along the Globe Theatre, and a few restaurants. Jean sat besides him, always smiling widely when Marco’s eyes beamed up in anticipation and glowing himself.

 

All the time Eren had held my hand. Sometimes a little loosely, so he could play with my fingers, his fingertips feathery tapping over my palm and then brushing over my own fingers, circling my fingertips and linking our fingers again tightly with a silent smile that made my heart flood over, leaving my chest feel almost unbearably tight.

 

After a while Sasha had pulled Connie, Marco, and Jean up to join them into a chicken dance ‘New Girl Style’ to Phil Collins’ ‘A Groovy Kind of Love’. They stood all in a circle, pecked with their heads, flapped their elbows and gabbled with their hands. It looked utterly ridiculous but honestly like very much of fun, so – naturally – Eren pulled me up as well and we joined them… what somehow ended in me being overpowered by emotions, leading to the second hallway incident this week and our inevitable leaving. 

 

The way home is silent and full of tension. I just want to grab him and throw him into the fucking cold snow again. He holds my hand again and I can literally feel his glances, that flash over me and tell me that he is as agitated as me. Our fingers are linked so hard, that it almost hurts, but I don’t intend to let go. The only thing I can think about is to cling on to him, to hold him tight. It is like holding on to a life-saver. With him I don’t even need or want to wear gloves anymore. It is much better this way with his thumb playing on my skin…

 

I can hear his breathing that has sped up, even if we don’t really walk very quickly. I feel my heart jumping into my throat and nestling there as if it would belong to that place, beating strongly and almost choking me. I sense it pumping fresh blood through me, leaving my fingers hungry for touch and my mouth dry with want. 

 

I feel it throbbing with every step I make, until I even hear it in my head and I wonder why he can’t hear it himself. It is screaming so loudly, that I ask myself why my chest is still intact.

 

And all the same at every beat it is whispering his name. E-ren. E-ren. Over and over again. Like a mantra or my most favourite but broken record. As if I needed a reminder of whose hand I’m holding right now and who is so close, that he is everything to me. 

 

All my senses are enhanced by now. How his hand feels in mine. How our breathing and our hasty footsteps in the scrunching snow sound. How the air tastes like and the aftermath of our last kiss. It tasted like apple cake. Sweet, delicate, comforting. And like Eren. 

 

I notice every little light on our way. His breath that escapes him in small clouds that I would love to catch and keep for myself if they weren’t that fleeting. I smell the cold, the snow, the iciness in the air and a slight fragrance of him. 

 

He really is like the sun. Wonderfully adorable. Yellow – my most favourite colour – and warm all over. And he reminds me of the Coldplay song. He is bright, and beautiful. Life itself. And I think I might burn because of him some day. But I don’t care.

 

The silence between us expands and becomes almost too loud. Too obvious. But saying something would shatter this precious moment. It would almost make it cheap and insignificant, like something trivial… what it is not. It is everything but. So we remain quiet.

 

_Will it always be this way with him? This intense?_ It is like he is my whole world and I would only have to dive into it to find blissful happiness. I want to lose myself in him. In his laughter, in his scent and his winning smile. And I long for him to wish the same. 

 

As I fumble for the house’s keys in my pockets he steps closer and leans down to close the distance between us and nibbles at my cold ears. 

 

“Levi,” he whispers, so yearningly that I feel something inside of me shatter.

 

His mouth is very distracting and soon the keys are forgotten as I push him against the entrance and kiss him again. He answers it intensely, all the same curiously, and his tongue grazes softly over mine… it is driving me crazy instantly.

 

“Eren.” 

 

He moans deeply into my mouth in response, makes our kiss slow down a bit and turns me on with that even more. His fingertips tenderly caress the back of my head and my cheeks with feather light strokes, and send new delicious shivers through me, that make my body react on its own. I inhale sharply while my back arches upwards, completely lost in the moment. _Fuck these thick coats! I want to feel him. Everywhere!_

 

“Fuck!” I hear myself whimper and my body melts against his in a greedy wave.

 

My hands tighten their grip on his coat while his tongue keeps on exploring me. I feel how its gentle, wet, and hot thrushes send shots of electricity from the tip of my tongue right down through my spine and into my cock. It is like being licked everywhere at once and his curious and needy little sounds are like pleas to my soul. Our lips are moving in sync now, our breaths are staring to get heavier, even if he still takes his time, and my knees are getting wobbly. How the bloody fuck does he do that? He hasn’t even really touched me yet. _And where the fuck is my bloody self control?_

 

He pulls away, his glittering eyes burning their gaze into mine. It gives me enough time and willpower to finally get out my keys and let us in. We make our stumbling walk upstairs and trip into our flat…

 

…where we are greeted by a black fluffy monster, who is in desperate need for attention. Lizzy is so eagerly stroking between our feet that we have to break apart first to greet the greedy brat so we don’t trample her. Maybe the first fire crackers outside have made her jittery and needy for care. All I know is that her distressed miaows make me worried and she behaves not as her usual calm self. 

 

“Hey, Lizzy,” Eren coos gently. “Are you all right, girl?”

 

We take off our coats, scarfs, cap and shoes, and I decide to open a small can of fresh cat food. That seems to help, and as soon as the munching sound of a raving beast fills the kitchen I relax a bit. If she eats properly she probably is fine after all. Cats usually stop eating altogether if there is something serious going on.

 

I turn around to Eren again who seems to watch us with a hint of worry of his own. I long for him and to hear his wonderful voice, so I let my fingers trail over his neck as I nibble at his lips and lick them right afterwards. 

 

His eyes flutter shut with a gasp. “Mmmhh! Levi.” God how I love it when he sighs my name like that.

 

“Mhh, please let me hear you more!” I beg, not caring if I might sound needy or pathetic. “I absolutely adore your pretty noises.” I kiss and lick my ways over his jaw, his throat, and his Adam’s apple and slowly make my way to his neck. He whimpers in anticipation. “I love it how you scream my name. It’s so fucking hot.” I whisper into his ear before fondly sucking his skin at the exact right spot. 

 

“L–levi!” _Fuck!_ His voice is shaking already and his hips push against mine. Shit, it is too arousing. So arousing that I gasp in surprise and don’t even know how his lips are suddenly back on mine again and my back is pressed to the kitchen counter. 

 

“Levi.” he whispers again. “Please… I need you.”

 

This simple wish is what makes my mind go into overload. I look up into his fascinating eyes that are begging for more and feel as if he has pushed a button deep inside of me. My stomach roars in joy and time seems to expand. I notice how his lips are red and his mouth is slightly open and subtly quivering, while he bites on his lower lip. It triggers something very male in my gut that pushes me forward and into action. My hands fly forward, grip his tie to pull him closer and before the surprised and satisfied moan can reach his lips I have sealed them with mine. 

 

My tongue is forcing its way into his mouth and his next sigh turns into a deep hum that sets my every nerve on fire. My other hand is feeling around for his fly, caressing him through his trousers and _oh god he is hard and hot already!_ I cup him, making his body flinch and I enjoy my effect before carefully rubbing him through obviously too many disturbing layers of fabric whilst deepening our kiss even more. 

 

I still have his tie in my grip but loosen it enough so he can stand upright again. My tongue is fluttering against his, testing his reactions and daring him to meet me halfway. As he responses and thrusts back with passionate licks I decisively start to push him into the bedroom. My hands are both holding his neck now, playing with his hair and brushing over his ears from time to time while his hands are digging their fingers into the back of my shirt. 

 

_God, this feels marvellous!_ I turn us around, until I feel the bed at the back of my knees and sit, pulling him down with me until he practically is on my lap. 

 

“Eren…” I whisper between heavy pants and look him deep into the eyes. I want to reach down there and touch everything until he doesn’t remember anything but me. “Please. Tell me what to do, love.”

 

As a response he stares back at me with his bright and attentive gaze, and lets his hand move over my head. He brushes away my fringe with his fingertips that leave trails of fire behind, strokes over my cheeks, and jaw, and lips. Not breaking his gaze his hands move down to his tie and pull it open with a rustling whisper that sounds much more intense than it should. 

 

As he boldly moves his hips forward I feel his erection pushing against my stomach, and I have to gulp in pure lust while he is still observing my reactions. His nose is nudging mine tenderly and finally I hear his voice at my ear. 

 

“Levi.” _Oh shit, this feels too good._ “Levi.” He repeats under his breath and I shudder in utter bliss. “Surprise me.”

 

A muttered “Fuck!” is all I can manage before my predatory instincts take over control completely. And this is about the time when I fully realise that, except for his tie, we both are still fully dressed. 

 

“What are we doing with this silly suits, love?”

 

He grins down at me. “They really are stupid right now, aren’t they?”

 

“So stupid…” I mumble and peel off both of our jackets before I unbutton his shirt while already leaning up to kiss his throat. His moan that rises in his chest and vibrates through his Adam’s apple where my tongue is licking him cheers me on to proceed and soon his shirt is open. _Fuck… he smells so endearingly delicious!_ I scatter further hasty kisses over his throat and his collarbones as I unbutton my own shirt and loosen my tie as well. I shrug off the shirt with a fierce tug, look into his eyes and hold him tight before rolling us over so that I lie on top of him. 

 

His warm and inviting smile that he gives me sends a deep and possessive growl over my vocal chords and makes him shiver under me. He pulls the tie over my head but instead of throwing it away indifferently he pulls it over his head now, his eyes still fixed on mine and glittering in all the fucking perfect ways. It makes me feel as if I could conquer the whole world and I lean down to kiss him until his needy little screams fill my mouth again. 

 

I pull away and finally remove our pants and socks. First his and then my own. I toss them away, not caring where they land or if Lizzy will built herself a nest out of them. All I can think about is how he lies on my bed like he is living in a goldfish bowl, with his erection already so hard, glistening, and twitching that I feel my own one throbbing almost painfully in urging need. My tie is wrapped around his neck and lying on his chest as if to mark him as mine…

 

He is so fucking perfect.

 

“Eren!”

 

I hungrily glare down at him before I dash forward to the nightstand to get out the lube and a condom and settle down on top of him again. 

 

“Let me…” he begs and reaches for the condom and my dick. By now I am so hard and sensitive that his careful strokes over my wet tip make me see stars already. 

 

“Eren…please,” he just nods and opens the condom package to roll it on me with his slender fingers. I quickly fumble open the bottle of lube and spread it on my fingers. 

 

He looks so absolutely endearing that I can not stop myself from fondling him shortly before circling his entrance. He quivers as I push my finger into him, coaxing a greedy moan out of him. A second digit follows and I feel how tight he is clasping around me. So warm. And I feel my way to the right spot…

 

“Ahhh!” His yell strikes a chord in me and I hasten to loosen him up more. _Fuck…!_

 

“Is this okay, love?” I ask, my gaze fixed on his once more, trying to catch every emotion. He nods with watery eyes and beams up at me with so much love that I now I have to hurry. I add the third finger, on my search for the right spot again. I want him to feel good… I need him to. 

 

His back arches up with an ecstatic scream and I pull out my fingers to replace them with my cock. I hold his hips in place and slowly thrust into him. 

 

I am all inside of him now and lean down to kiss him fiercely. He gasps into my throat and one of my hands flies upwards, under the noose of my tie to play gently with his neck.

 

His muffled groan hums over my tongue and I begin to retreat and push back into him, hoping to find the right angle, because I’m so fucking close already that I don’t know how much longer I can keep up. 

 

“Ngh!”

 

“Oh my… fuck…! Eren!”

 

I let go of his mouth to lick over the other side of his neck with another thrust and am rewarded with a breaking, ecstatic scream. 

 

“L…levi… ah–” his nails dig into my back for hold and the uncontrollable twitching of his body and his clasping around me take me over the edge with him. 

 

All I can do as I come down is look into his bright, glowing eyes. His face is breathtaking and his smile is like a sunrise… even his hair looks at if it was glowing. He kisses me tenderly letting his whole body press up against mine and makes my heart flood over with love for him. I slow down my thrusts, carefully move out of him, remove the condom and go into the bathroom for something to clean us up. 

 

I fetch a towel to dampen it with warm water and bring it back to him before cleaning myself. I lay back down on the bed besides him, reach out, and reposition us into a deep embrace, my chest at his side, so we can both hug each other, and pull the blanket over us so he doesn’t get cold. 

 

And there I listen to his beating heart, so wonderfully strong and powerful, until mine almost beats in sync, while his hands are running calmingly through my hair and over my back. 

 

I never want this to end. 

 

“How late is it?” he asks softly. 

 

My eyes glance over to my nightstand with the old radio alarm clock. “A little after 11 pm…” 

 

“Should we move over to the couch? I don’t want to fall asleep before midnight.” His arms hug me closer. “I want to kiss my man properly and wish him a happy new year.” 

 

“It really is cosy in here, isn’t it?” _Fuck this hoarse voice of mine!_  


 

He just hugs me once more in response, kisses the top of my head and we move out of the bed to dress in comfortable clothes and join Lizzy who already awaits us on the sofa.

 

She seems a little calmer now, but flinches pitifully at every early fire cracker that goes off outside. Bloody New Year’s Eve in Germany. I never understood the concept of having private fireworks all over the country that don’t even make sense. Guy Fawkes Night’s fireworks is so much more reasonable… Probably my poor cat will endure the night under our bed until it is safe and quiet again outside. 

 

But for now she keeps us company as we lay down under the blanket, again facing each other with his feet besides my chest and mine next to his. I am so nervous this night and hope he won’t notice it, so I reach out for his feet and massage them carefully to distract my thoughts. 

 

“Mhh. This feels so nice,” he smiles at me. It is almost too emotional and I decide to antagonise it and pinch his small toe. “Hey!” he chuckles.

 

He reaches out for my feet with a mischievous grin on his beautiful face and I wonder why, since he knows I’m not ticklish. But instead of poking my sole of foot he simply pulls on the sock. _What the hell?_

 

His slender fingers tie a knot into my sock that is still attached to my foot. “That’s what you get for evil tickling,” he smirks proudly. “Do you like it?”

 

“This is so uncomfortable…” I moan and every attempt to stay calm and feign an angry mood is going to hell as I have to giggle so heavily that I end up in an embarrassing hiccup of my own. 

 

Great! So much for staying composed… 

 

“Look what you’ve done!” _*hic!*_ “You broke me!”

 

“Who’s adorable now?” his laughter shakes through the both of us.

 

“I’m not adorable! Am manly as fuck!” _*hic!*_

 

“Yes, you are.” But his smug grin tells me otherwise and as he pokes out his tongue at me I fold my arms over my chest in defeat and wait for the annoying hiccup to fade. 

 

“Pull it off, please?”

 

“The other sock, too? Of course.” And before I can fight it properly my other sock is in a hideous knot as well and the so innocent looking devil in front of me giggles like a maniac. 

 

Who ever once had their sock knotted in such an obnoxious way knows… it uncomfortable as fuck. It feels like a scratch you just have to itch, so of course I jerk forward to do the same to him and shuffle my feet until they are freed from their awful prison that’s called socks. 

 

It doesn’t even seem to concern him at all – he is resting on the couch with a beaming grin and making himself at home. 

 

“…”

 

“…”

 

“This doesn’t bother you?” It bothers me, actually. He’s looking so absurd with his easy demeanour, the black tie, that somehow got spared earlier, still wrapped around his neck, and the twisted cloth on the top of his toes that I want to shiver. My hands itch and I have to force my eyes to look away.

 

“What? My socks? No, it’s nice.”

 

“Oh, what the fucking hell…” I pull them off of him and can finally sigh in relief what makes him bubble out in laughter again. 

 

_Well at least my hiccup is gone._

 

“You’re such a neat freak! I love you.”

 

“Tch.” I try to pout, but it doesn’t really work with that foolish smile glued to my stupid face. “I know.”

 

The firecrackers outside pop up more frequently now, announcing the approach of the new year and shooing away our fluffy companion. Yup, just as I thought, right into the bedroom to hide under the bed. 

 

I check my phone on the coffee table. 11.48 pm. Better get started. I squeeze his legs and stand up again. “I’ll already get the champagne.” 

 

I also fetch a pair of glasses and, after hesitating, the ashlar-formed box that Petra had brought over today. I look into it again and have to smile excitedly. Just as I remembered. My heart his skipping a beat, my hands are suddenly sweaty, and I want to curse at myself. Is it always like this? I never have done this before, obviously, and it always looks so easy in films. I glance over to the couch where he has sit up again, his back to me and his arms over his head in a stretch. 

 

_Come on. You kicked a guy once, you can do this._

 

Suddenly it all seems so tacky and lame. I want to run and hide. But the urge to go back to him is too strong so I pull myself together and make myself to just go through with it. _He won’t kill me for this, will he?_

 

I clear my throat, sadly it doesn’t scare away the loud and agitating screams in my head, and casually place the box on the coffee table whilst twiddling with the cork of the champagne bottle. 

 

_Damn these sweaty hands! I’m over forty years old. This should be_ easy _for crying out loud!_

 

“What’s in the box?” His curious look is fixed on the black, wooden object in front of him and turns to me. The fact that he still wears my tie, marking him as mine in such a sweet way, is making me strangely proud. But it doesn’t improve my situation. It just makes this almost strangling lump in my throat even worse. 

 

In loss for words I shrug my shoulders. _Smooth… so smooth! And so eloquent._ “Open it.” He fumbles with the small plain container, searching for a lid to lift.

 

_He will laugh at me._

 

_He will sigh and excuse himself._

 

_He will storm out and leave me. Maybe even scream and shout. He will tell me this all was a joke. No, he won’t. He’s too honest and kind for that._

 

_This is so much too early…_

 

_Oh what do I care? I’ve been defying conventions all my life._

 

“Ahem… Levi?” His question comes out with a slight tremble, that makes my mouth go all dry, and the lump in my throat where I can feel my heart hammering like crazy feels as if it is about to choke me. 

 

“Hm?” I try my best keeping calm and not to shake with my hands as I pour us the champagne. 

 

“What is this?” His voice is only a gasp now and I force myself to look at him.

 

_Don’t you dare cry now, old man. You sobbed enough this noon with Hanji, when she found out accidentally, remember? Happy tears really are the worst…_

 

I clear my throat once more as I put the champagne filled glass and the bottle itself back on the table. “I designed them during my education. It was a studies project in cooperation with a goldsmith’s school. That’s how I met Petra and Erwin.” 

 

He just looks back, his widened eyes bright as ever, but silent. And now that I started talking I can’t stop the words. “She makes them out of a single piece and bends them until the shape is right. Usually they only weld the ends to make them round, which I find quite odd actually. Also they are both from the same disc of metal so they are practically actually the same, you see?” 

 

_He’s still sitting here. You can do this!_

 

“These are made of silver, for now. First because I wasn’t quite sure about your size and second it’s for finding out if they fit properly without being uncomfortable after a while or if they have to be changed somehow. Mine has been finished for years now…” 

 

_Almost done._

 

I take a short look at the two rings sitting next to each other in the small box in his hands, before meeting his stunned stare again. The bands are slim and simple, the edges just curved enough so they fit comfortably – which they should, regarding the fact that they will be worn for hopefully the rest of your life. 

 

I just hope we guessed his size right, even if it is just a dummy for now.

 

“I realise this is so early…? But fuck the rules! And I don’t want to wait with this. I don’t want to fucking miss out on anything with you.” The amused sparkles in his beautiful turquoise eyes that flash up at that almost make me lose it. “I love you. Please–”

 

“Yes.” Suddenly his arms have shot forwards and hug me in a warm, tight embrace. How good that we are sitting already because right now I am close to fainting. I inhale his wonderful scent and hug him back, so utterly relieved that he is still here. “Is this the payback for me saying I love you first? Oh,… sorry… you weren’t finished yet,” he chuckles in apology. 

 

“Tch. You will interrupt me anyway again, so I don’t see the point.” I mumble on his shoulder with a chuckle of my own.

 

“True.” His arms squeeze me again before letting go of me. “But let’s try anyway please? So, hit me again.”

 

“Please–”

 

“Yes!… Shit…” He clasps his hands over his mouth, his eyes glowing and beaming happily at me. 

 

With knowing my answer already this should be so easy. So why isn’t it? 

 

I glare at him, daring him with my gaze to neither laugh or cry right now or this will take forever. And it is emotional hell. 

 

“…marry me, Eren.” Tiny tears are glistening in his eyes as he nods.

 

“Of course, I will.” He sighs, relieving me from my self-imposed torture, just as the fireworks outside begin to brighten the night sky and welcome the new year. It will be a good one. I know it. 

 

I just do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The chicken dance is adorable and every time I watch New Girl it makes my heart melt. I mean… honestly. [How can you not love this?](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=z_adVaRBkPI)
> 
> [The Coldplay song](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1MwjX4dG72s) is freaking amazing and also part of [this beautiful Ereri fic](http://archiveofourown.org/works/3253295) with a deaf Eren. 
> 
> Thank you so much for reading this! Please let me know what you think. <3
> 
> My [tumblr](http://sugarplum-senpai.tumblr.com/)


	32. Chapter 32

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> (just a little extra)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Apparently a thing: Drawing the ground plot of the flat in your own fan fiction when you can't sleep at night… \o/
> 
> So here it is. Not really additional text (yet… I'm already writing on a prequel, since those guys just keep on telling me stuff) but a little guideline for those who might be interested in how Levi's flat looks like in this story. The ground plot of Hanji's flat is exactly the same since she lives on the floor below Levi, it only is furnished a little differently of course.

Levi's place:

 


End file.
